Transferring Twice?

College Search & Selection
1

<p>I attended, what I thought to be, my dream college after high school. It was a city school, and it turned out that I was unhappy having no college campus and I felt like I wasn't getting the overall college experience that I wanted. I decided to transfer, but was still unsure of who I was and what I really wanted in a college. All I knew was that I wanted to go to a small college with a campus. I ended up applying to a few schools and decided to transfer to one of them my sophomore year. It was kind of a rushed decision since the whole summer I was debating whether to go to this new school. Part of me was telling me to go back to my old school for another semester and be sure of what I really wanted before making the decision, but my parents were pressuring me since they thought I would really like the new school. So I transferred to the new school and am here now. It is a prestigious school, I have made some great new friends, and am fine here. However, I don't feel as if I am being pushed or meeting any interesting people. It has a very homogenous student body. Everyone is very preppy, the greek life is overwhelming, and it seems all anyone wants to do is party and drink. I thought this was how I was as well and it actually was how I have been my entire life. However, I am just starting to realize who I am and what I really want to do. I did a great deal of self-evaluation here and took a theatre class that really opened my mind. I realized that I am extremely interested in film and the arts. I realized how much I miss painting and doing things that truly make me happy. I want to meet interesting people who aren't afraid to be individuals and speak their mind and are passionate about something other than partying. I feel as if I have been holding back who I truly am for so long and am finally ready to embrace it. I regret rushing into this new school but at the same time I don't think I would have realized this about myself had I not. </p>

<p>So here's my question: I now am contemplating transferring to a school that is more centered around the arts and has a more heterogenous student body where I can pursue my dreams and feel free to be an individual and not conform. (Schools like Vassar College, Wesleyan University, Bard College). I feel like college is the best time to explore who you are and try new things and I am feeling very anxious about making the change and not wasting my time somewhere where I know isn't going to allow me to be pushed. Based on all of this information, do you think it is the right decision transfer to a second school?</p>

<p>PLEASE HELP!</p>

2

<p>Transferring to a second school is a potential huge financial burden and is rarely a “positive” thing (even people who are choosing to transfer for positive reasons like you have very bad outcomes with increased numbers of transferring).</p>

<p>I think you need to work on finding or creating a space for you to be who you are regardless of your environment. Losing the credits, time, and money and not learning how to adjust your circumstances to fit your need are just not worth it, IMO.</p>

3

<p>That’s a pretty good response from Melody.</p>

4

<p>All of it is true. But it can be done and I have seen it done. </p>

<p>However, one has to learn to make the best of their situations and circumstances in life. We can’t do job hopping because we are not finding the perfect world we are seeking. Life isnt that way. </p>

<p>It is true that in undergraduate school we do more exploring and self analysis and growing…all that is good. But there are some limits…some of which are external, like time and money, others which are internal like always jumping from place to place searching for our own soul. So you have to examine the situation from both paradigm’s. </p>

<p>Making the best of what you have and making creative things is part of what you are supposed to do in college. Get involved on campus. If that fails, then get involved in a community theatre group. </p>

<p>No school is perfect, certainly not for everyone. The grass is not always greener on the other side…it could be a mirage (or marketing! lol.) </p>

<p>Don’t be too hard on yourself either. These are normal feelings and need to be channeled into positive energy and outcomes. Develop a sense of humor when things go wrong or you get frustrated. </p>

<p>If you tend to be a perfectionist then learn to curb that to a more reasonable and rational level, accepting that people will often frustrate you and life is full of surprises both good and bad. Balance. </p>

<p>Transferitis is a common feeling among freshmen…and sometimes sophomores. Most of the time it will pass if you persevere and seek out bigger and better challenges on campus, adjust lifestyles, or learn to cope better/find humor in things. Growing up is not an easy path for anyone…and its awkward when dreams confront reality. </p>

<p>Without more information, it is hard to advise you. Did you talk to a professor about this? Did you speak with your advisor? Did you speak with student counseling services? All three may have really good suggestions on how to make it better where you are.</p>

<p>Theatre is excellent and fun…but also highly competitive as a career…the starving artist syndrome. Better to do it as a hobby and outlet for your creative “karma” and get a degree in something that might help you find solid employment…even if that is a history or english degree…something that a company wants or needs…liberal arts students DO find meaningful and well paying work…sometimes in surprising places. </p>

<p>Best of luck.</p>

5

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<p>If you decide to transfer, it’s important to choose a university very carefully. With your new self-knowledge, you should be able to identify traits of schools which would suggest that the schools are a good fit for you. This, along with thinking long and hard about whether it’s worthwhile to transfer and where you’d like to transfer to, should help you make a good decision.</p>

<p>I can relate to your situation. I’m also creative and individualistic, but didn’t realize it until well after high school. I had to learn the hard way that I don’t fit in with the preppy types you describe. I also know firsthand how disruptive it is to transfer…</p>

<p>I agree that in general, it’s good to try to make imperfect situations work for you. But there are limits to how far you can shoehorn yourself to fit into an environment that just won’t work. If you’re creative and individualistic and the people at the school really are as conformist as you say, it’s likely that nothing you do will make it possible to connect with them. At the end of the day, you can’t make people accept you. And people will eventually see through a fa</p>

6

<p>Agree with Melody.</p>

<p>If I were your parent we would be talking about how to make the best of your situations in life rather than believing your perfect world is another transfer away.</p>

<p>You’ve only got 2 years left!</p>

7

<p>If you go to three schools, you will have to face questions about that at every job interview, and you will at times have to submit three transcripts. If you go to grad school and graduate, some of that problem will dissipate, and as you age it will lessen as well. But it’s still something to consider. Going back to school #1 sounds like a pretty good option. If the third school is much cheaper than the first two, that could help to explain the changes, plus it would help if case you need more than four years to finish college.</p>

8

<p>I know someone who did this and was very happy with her decision. She started at a small school and she was an URM there. She hated this. She did not have the grades to get into the school that she wanted, so she went to a state school and lived at home for one year. She pulled up her gpa. She reapplied to the school she wanted to attend since senior year of HS BTW, but she was rejected at this school twice. She was finally accepted and she graduated in 4.5 years. Good luck!</p>