<p>I'm currently a sophomore and I don't have a group of friends to hang out with. I have a couple friends here and there but we don't hang out regularly. I always get depressed over the weekends because I don't have any plans. I'm in a club so I know some people but I don't really have any close friends. The semester is almost over so there isn't much I can do about it right now. This summer I'm going to be studying in China through the fall semester. I'm going with a group of people from my school but I don't know anyone because I'm in a different level Chinese class than they are. I'm a little worried about making friends with these people because I've had trouble making friends in the past. Sometimes I think it will probably be find and that I won't have any trouble making friends with them but I'm still a little worried cause I can be very socially awkward and a little shy. It's really important that I make good friends because I'll be in China for seven months.<br>
Does anyone have any tips for me to help me stop worrying and help me be more confident interacting with people?</p>
<p>Here’s some ideas that jump into my mind:
1 - Read both fiction and nonfiction about China over the summer. Bring paperback copies with you of favorite books - you can loan/give them to others.<br>
2 - Read/research the area of China that you will be visiting (e.g. transportation options, good places to hang out, fun day trips, etc). That way, you will walk in with confidence of where you are going and what to do. Having your “bearings” while others are still gaining theirs will give you confidence, and make you someone that others can talk to about practical issues.<br>
3. consider setting up a Facebook for students who are going. Ask the study abroad office if they will send an email to all participants suggesting they join the Facebook group. Be an active participant in discussions on the group - many shy people do better in writing. </p>
<p>If all else fails, get to know the locals! When I was 20, I did a January political science “tour” through my university. There were 12 of us on the tour, and we visited 5 political capitals in 3 weeks. We would have one day and one night free, one day of meetings, and one day to sightsee and travel to the new country. I have never had trouble making friends, but spent the first country trying to find my niche. Of the 12, 4 consistently were doing drugs. Seriously? In a foreign country you are smoking dope in someone’s room on your one night? Of the other 8, 2 just didn’t resonate and 6 liked to stick together, wake up late, have breakfast in the hotel, see one spot, return to a semi-ok restaurant close to the hotel, and then play cards. Seriously? By the second country, I had stopped trying to convince them that there was a more interesting way to travel, and started going out on my own. As a 20 year old woman, I had to be extra careful, but the more I started going out by myself and following the recommendations of locals and others, the more fun I had. By the third country, I was completely on my own, and making friends in cafes, etc. Obviously, I continued to be VERY careful, and never go with people I didn’t know, but there was never an issue. I brought my good judgement with me from the states. It wasn’t until the fourth country that one of the girls came up to me and said “You know, it seems like you are having way more fun and experiences than we are - can i come with you tomorrow?” I actually felt really sad for the others - the rest never really caught on. Moral: a person alone can have interesting adventures that wouldn’t happen in a group - be brave but smart!</p>
<p>How many people are going on the trip total? Do these people all know each other already aside from you? Will you have a roommate?</p>
<ul>
<li><p>I studied abroad this past summer for about 2 months with a group of 30 people that I didn’t know prior to the trip. I’m also a shy person and was worried about not fitting in or not having a “group,” but from the very start, I was able to get to know a lot of the people rather easily. I had a good experience, and it was a good confidence booster as well. I found that everyone was pretty friendly and open. Particularly with Study Abroad groups, everyone’s excited about having a great experience abroad and sharing that experience with others, which means that most will be open to meeting new people, making new friends, and hanging out. You’re not the only one who wants to make friends. Keep that in mind. </p></li>
<li><p>This might not work out since you’ll be in China (I think Facebook is blocked?), but I’ll talk about it anyway: For my study abroad, we had a Facebook group. It’s a great way to connect with everyone, communicate, ask questions, and make plans for activities. During your time abroad, you’ll have a chance to travel (weekends or holidays). For my trip, we’d have people post things in the Facebook group saying stuff like “Hey, anyone interested in taking a trip to <city> during our long weekend from <date> to <date>?” or “Hey, anyone want to do <activity> tonight? Meet at <location> at <time>” etc. This was really beneficial, because it was always an open invitation to the entire group collectively.</time></location></activity></date></date></city></p></li>
<li><p>When invited to go somewhere or do something, accept! If you don’t have anything to do and want to do something, ask if anyone wants to join! If you have a roommate, it’s easier. If you’re living alone / with a host family, identify people from your study abroad program that live close by.</p></li>
<li><p>Promise yourself that you’re going to make an effort to get to know people from the get-go. Talk to people, introduce yourself. Ask them questions. (Most people like talking about themselves.) Be genuinely interested. I know for shy people, it’s sometimes difficult to take initiative in talking to people you don’t know, but it gets easier. Also, China has tons of people! Make friendships with the local people as well, not just the people in your study abroad program.</p></li>
<li><p>Studying abroad is like a fresh start again. Think about things you did when you first started college that worked and things you didn’t do that you wish you did. Explore! Try new things! Have fun!</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Yeah I don’t have a roommate so I’m worried I might be isolated from the group.</p>
<p>You need to start LIVING! 
You’re in the prime of your life, young, traveling …Let go of your shyness. Live without this kind of regret so you don’t miss out on many great friendships!</p>
<p>To make friends…
Locate a person who you want to make friends with. Walk by them or sit down (helps if you’re already sitting next to each other) and ask them a question about themself. Like, “are you in such and such program too?” “What’s your major?” “What do you want to do most in China?” and so on…it can be anything. Odds are they are shy too so you can easily make friends if you open up first, they will open up in response. Be complimentary and be honest.
Ask them about themself and smile a lot! Just ask whatever you like that you want to know about them, people love making new friends and talking about themself hehe ^^
Just keep talking each time you meet and being friendly with them, let down your barriers, say what comes to your mind, and soon you guys will be good friends.</p>
<p>I used to be a really shy person too…but since I came to college, I have actually become an outgoing person. Don’t let your past stigma of “shy person” stop you either.
The most important thing is to not fear rejection from friends. Sure, friends come and go, but you should not regret making fun memories together! Enjoy yourself and get out there and live ! :)</p>
<p>You don’t want to get old and be kicking yourself for being so shy!</p>
<p>Also, take the initiative to ask people to hang out.
Once you show you’re interested in being more than just acquaintances but actually good buddies, they will understand. So, it’s good to do this early when you meet them.</p>