twins

Parents Forum
1

<p>How does being a twin help in the application process? I'm referring to circumstances when both twins apply to the same school. </p>

<p>I am a fraternal twin. My brother and I are both "overachieving," you might say, but doing well academically comes more easily to him than it does to me. He is valedictorian, nationally ranked for math, he has perfect board scores, and that is out of 5 different sat IIs, the sat I, and multiple APs that he self-taught. He is the student teacher for the Physcis C and the Calculus BC courses at school. He is president and concertmaster of the regional youth orchestra. Etc etc etc blahdy blah blah - he was accepted to Harvard early this past December. </p>

<p>I, on the other hand, used to be third of 500 at the beginning of junior year, but now am eleventh, having dropped after an exhaustingly full year of extracurriculars and only ok academics. I have completely different interests than my brother has; every weekend, I drive to Rhode Island to study voice with a former Metropolitan Opera singer, and last year, I left school three weeks early to study voice and Italian at a program run by Met affiliates. I've won several voice competitions. Additionally, I do original research in a laboratory at Yale University for which I was funded by a national grant. And I've been invited to speak about my research at statewide and townwide conferences. </p>

<p>He and I each, respectively, have leadership positions at school, too - I'm the first person ever to be Ed-in-chief of the school paper for two consecutive years, I've created a chamber choir at school, I'm cast as a lead in every school show, while he is president of a number of teams, including the debate, the chess, and the physics teams. </p>

<p>But my academics have taken a definite hit. The first quarter this year, I was more busy than I've ever been with all my various activities, and my grades were utterly atrocious, very mixed, with an A+, yes, but also with Cs. My boards are "ok". I have 1450 sat I and an 800 writing sat II, but my math and bio sat IIs are in the high 600s. </p>

<p>Also, I was deferred from Yale early. </p>

<p>I do have a point - that extracurricular backdrop is to give you a sense of how we "measure up" to each other, if you will, although it probably is rather unhealthy of me to compare myself to him - and my point is to ask your opinions, thoughts, and ideas about the situation. He and I both applied to the following three top schools: Yale, Harvard, and Princeton. </p>

<p>I've also applied to a billion other schools, although really only ones where I can study classical voice seriously while working in a really academic, intellectual environment. I'd love to hear your thoughts about my getting into those schools, although that is not my intent in creating this thread. </p>

<p>Thank you very much for taking the time to read through all this.</p>

2

<p>I know it is tough not to compare yourself to your brother. But it is clear from your post that you both are unique people with great futures ahead of you, and I think the comparisons will be less frequent and less important after you both have a chance to follow your interests in college. That will happen even faster if you don't end up at the same school. </p>

<p>I think you are in a win situation no matter what happens. You clearly know what you are doing, so I am sure you've picked your "other" schools with care. And outside of the Harvard, Yale etc. group, where most of the applicants have outstanding ECs, your music and research ECs will make you stand out in the applicant pool.</p>

3

<p>As the mother of boy/girl twins myself, I can only say that your parents must be totally popping their buttons over the two of you! If you were my daughter and getting all the leads in the play, I'd just be enjoying the heck out of it and saying who cares if your grades aren't perfect? It sounds like you both got a dynamite package of talents and to the extent that you can, I'd say try not to worry about competing with your brother.</p>

4

<p>First of all, a big thank you to both reidm and enjoyingthis. Your comments make me feel really positive about this process, as demoralizing as it may be. Unfortunately, I don't always have support at home re:college. My parents are proud of my and my sibling's multiple accomplishments, definitely, but my dad is very disappointed in me for allowing my grades to drop, especially during the two most important marking periods of my high school academic career. I do understand his point of view, but I often wish he could see it from mine - I already have a lot of self-consciousness regarding my academic work because my brother and I are always viewed as "the twins" by teachers in school; I am a very sociable person, and I tend to place at least a moderate priority on my social life; being a teenager is difficult! Trite, I know, but true.</p>

<p>Anyway, thanks again.</p>

5

<p>Figure out where your brother is going to go (Harvard?) and go somewhere else! :D Sounds to me like "voice" training/department/performance opportunities will be a high priority for you in choosing a school. Also bear in mind that based on your unique circumstances anyone within a 500 mile radius of your home will instantly recognize you by your post! Write as if your parents, or GC, or college admissions officer, is standing behind you reading over your shoulder! (My philosophy at work - I write as if my boss is behind me... he is such a GREAT boss!!! :) )</p>

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<p>I realize that. Honestly, I don't care if my mother (she reads this board) or my brother (he literally is standing behind me) read this. :)</p>

7

<p>To begin with, it sounds to me like are a great kid who is going to get into a wonderful school and have every prospect of success. So in the larger view there isn't that much to worry about. Comparisons to your brother or exactly which school you get into are sort of minor points compared to the overall view.</p>

<p>But since these minor points are exactly what you are asking about: l can certainly see your dad's point in wincing over the drop in your grades. HYP will all take a dim view of some Cs turning up on your transcript unless there is some sort of death-in-the-family type explanation to go with them. Just being "busy" may not be sufficient, because you are going to be very busy pretty much your entire time at a highly selective college. I'm not saying that your chances for those schools are gone, only that they are certainly reduced. But on the plus side, you are still a very strong student overall and with terrific ECs, so I'm sure that most of the "billion" other schools you applied to will be eager to accept you. And who knows? Maybe Princeton is looking to boost its voice program and will be putting you in admit pile later this week.</p>

<p>The twin thing is an interesting angle. I'm guessing it means different things at different schools. I know that some schools like to take both twins. There are several sets of twins at Harvard this year. I think MIT accepted something like 8 sets of twins last year, and Berkeley accepted all three girls of a set of triplets.</p>

<p>As for being compared to your brother, you might as well accept that it is inevitable. It's been going on since at least the caveman man days with no let-up in sight. Sometimes I think kids hurt themselves by deliberately avoiding activities that their siblings also did just to avoid the comparisons. The key thing is to make your own path in the world and do the things that interest you without regard to whether your brother did/does them too. Don't try to be be the same as your brother, but don't try to be different either. Just be you.</p>

8

<p>Go to Rice and have a wonderful life. No, seriously, you and your brother sound like amazing kids, I'm sure your family is extremely proud. I understand where your father is coming from - we have always emphasized to our kids - do your best, and we won't ask for more - the problem is he feels as if "you didn't do your best", and have ruined your chances at the "gold ring". There are other schools rather than HYP, and it sounds as if you are beginning to feel out what place science and art will have in your life. The "gold ring" for you may be very different than for your brother, and with the wide diversity of your interests, may be very different in the end from what you are considering now. Perhaps, pursuing these interests in place that is known for both, even though it doesn't have the gilt edges of Yale is what you need?</p>

9

<p>Aha! A twin! Yes, I am a twin as well dealing with a similar problem like yours. My twin brother and myself perform well in school, though I challenge myself a bit more than he does. Our ECs and academic achievements aren't as top-notch as yours, but they are still solid. What I want to point out is that I wish for a place where everything I do will not be compared between my twin brother and myself, a place where people can know me simply as Mike instead of one of the twins. I used that premise as my Common App essay and I think it turned out nicely. Obviously since the app deadlines have passed you can't work that into an essay, but I'm just saying what I used. w00t! twins unite!</p>

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<p>As a mom of twins, I can see exactly where you are coming from. I also have a S and D who do extremely well academically and in ECs, yet one is more of a "natural" test-taker than the other. So what? It won't matter in the long run.<br>
I have always encouraged them to strive to do their best and to each be their own person. It's not easy for twins. All siblings compete, but it's that much more difficult when someone is your same exact age, in the same grade, especially when you are both high achievers and feel like people are constantly comparing you.
I agree with NJres and reidm ... go to different schools and just look for what will make you happy. You both sound like amazing people who will go far in life on whatever paths you choose as (fortunately) you both excel in different areas. While it's natural to compare yourselves to each other now, when you are in separate environments you will just be you.<br>
I am not an expert, but I don't know that being a twin should impact your acceptances at all. I'm sure that neither of you would want to get into a specific school based upon the other's achievements.
Please keep us posted on your search and decisions!</p>

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<p>Thank you for the support and wisdom, everybody.</p>

12

<p>Wow, that's cool.. having a twin... not the part where you're overshadowed by his brilliance. </p>

<p>Your mark drop might hurt you, but I'm sure you're not alone. Most people's mark have dropped during this term. It sucks, for me anyways. </p>

<p>Anyways, here's my point. Don't compare urself to him. You guys are both great in your own ways. I heard the songs u sang and it was amazing.</p>

13

<p>Hey! I'm a twin, too! Cool. Of course I would never get into Harvard or Yale or Princeton, I am looking at very good schools (Brown/Dartmouth/Georgetown (accepted EA) being my top choices). My brother, however, is applying to a totally different set of schools: LACs. He has applied ED II to Pomona College. We are very similar in our stats: I have a 1410 SAT, he has a 1400, I have a 3.9, he has a 3.8, I have 2260 SAT IIs, he has 2220... you get the deal. His ECs focus on music and volunteering, while mine focus on French and and leadership. We are very different people (even though we have been branded "the twins," like some sort of single organism).</p>

<p>I have always wanted to go to a different college than him, however he does not care. The chances of this happening, however, are slim: the only schools that we both applied to are UPenn (not an LAC, but he liked it anyway) and the UCs (instate). I applied to only 8 schools (including 4 UCs), and he applied to a whopping 19 (including 5 UCs). Little things like this also make us different.</p>

<p>I'm not sure what I was trying to say in this post or if I was trying to answer a question, but oh well. Oh, and by the way, I have heard that being a twin counts as a kind of skewed form of "diversity," and in some cases does help (also, sometimes, even if one twin would not be accepted on his/her own, he/she is accepted if the other twin would be, since some places don't like to split up twins... this could just be a rumor, though). ;)</p>

14

<p>Back to Frecklybeckly,
Fraternal/different gender twins have the best of both worlds. You can play the "twin" card when it seems helpful (or cute when you are 5 and dressed in coordinated outfits), but you can opt out as well and no one has to "know" unless you are in a HS class of 500 and both near the top, or you both have red hair, are freckled and have an unusual last name.</p>

<p>I am not sure I understand the intent of your original question, at least as you frame it. Is it, will I get in since I am a twin whose brother is also outstanding and somewhat more likely to get in-in spite of the fact that I had a slightly off semester or two? </p>

<p>I guess I am not understanding, either, your motivation. Do you want to be compared with your brother and this is why you have applied to at least one school (impossible to get into) to which he has already been accepted? Do you want to attend the same school as your brother? Do you want on any level to think his coat-tails got you in?</p>

<p>You sound and seem like an articulate and clear thinking person, a person with tremendous abilities and talents. If/when the shadow of your brother is not looming on any level whatsoever, your star will shine that much more brightly...If you were my children I personally would not have written 2 checks to those 3 schools-- I wouldn't say this as an absolute for all twins, by the way.</p>

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<p>Thank you, again, for the responses. </p>

<p>To robynm: My original question was whether being a twin tips the admissions balance in my favor, especially given my circumstances. I did not intend to imply either that I am not strong enough to be a competitive applicant at these schools or that I do not want to go to these schools. I am, however, concerned with the dip in my academic record, but that is a much more general concern re: my applying to college. Personally, I think that's what kept me out of Yale early. Anyway, thank you for your response. It sometimes is difficult to keep in perspective how inconsequential the college admissions process is in the longrun, compared to what I have done with my life and what I plan to do with my life (and who I am!) and really how unimportant peoples' comparisons between me and my brother are. Thank you for reiterating both. </p>

<p>To calidan: It's good to hear that there's another twin out there :) I'm also applying to one of the UCs, to Berkeley, as is my brother - maybe I'll see you there! Good luck with this whole process, and good luck to your brother, too.</p>

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<p>Thanks! Good luck to both of you, too! :D</p>

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<p>I have a fraternal twin brother and we both went to the same college. Having a twin was great because when we visited campuses and talked to professors and admissions staff they remembered us. We were in the top 3 of our high school class and held similar leadership positions. We spent two years together at the same school before I transfered out due to academic problems. While bad for me at first it ended up being pretty good. All of our life people looked at us as one person and that continued when we roomed together in college. Other students hated the fact that we always hung with each other and kept to ourselves. When I transfered we became our own person. So when he goes to hang out with his engineering buddies they know only him and not "the twins".</p>

<p>I used to compare myself with my brother but that ended in college. While we both are in engineering we chose very different disciplines and have different career goals. I want to finish undergrad and go straight to law school. He wants to be an engineer for a while and eventually get a MBA. We will reach different levels of success in our careers and it would be unhealthy for use to measure up to each other in that respect. Competition between brothers can lead to bad things. My dad's brother had more success than him early in life and certain family members favored him because of it. And to this day they have a very distant relationship.</p>

18

<p>Frecklybeckly,
Can I just say that your willingness to consider input so openly is evidence of your strong sense of self and resilience. Some people might consider those even more important in life than straight A's..</p>

19

<p>Becky,
I can tell by your posts on the Yale board, and by listening to your voice in the sound files you posted, that you are one amazingly awesome person. I don't know how being a twin will effect your admissions, but I will say that some college is going to be very, very lucky when you choose that place to attend.</p>