<p>I'm a freshman this year and so far I just really haven't enjoyed myself at unc. I'm living in a dorm with primarily upperclassman who already know people. I haven't met that many new people. My only friends so far are really the people I know from high school but I'm so sick of them. Everyone keeps raving about how much they love unc and how many people they've met. Am I just missing something?</p>
<p>As a junior (AAAH!), that LOVES UNC, I have to say that in my opinion to love any organization/school/actvity...etc, you have to feel as if you are a part of it. So, with that being said, I say join a few clubs...do you have any particular interests/what's your major, maybe some of us upperclassmen (AAAH....I don't want to be one of those yet! ) on here can recommend some....also, once you get into Kenan stadium and the Dean Dome with everyone sporting their Carolina Blue as you cheer for the Heels, you'll really grow to love it here...there's nothing like screaming at the top of your lungs with all of your fellow Tar Heels. The semester just started today, don't worry yet...the days before class starts are always kind of a reunion with old friends/people in the dorm (ie somewhat boring if you're a freshman and you get to have a reunion with the people you've spent the past 13 years trying to get away from)...now that classes are in full swing, I'm sure you'll meet plenty of awesome people! As a freshman, I felt the same way for a little while (I was quiet), but now as I'm on the downward slope of my college years :( (and a lot louder) , I can't imagine how I ever felt that way here...give it a few days/weeks and I'm sure you'll love it just as much as all the upperclassmen that are ready to stay here forever...especially once the anxiousness of being a freshman wears off and you find your own rhythm. Now, I rarely see the people I graduated with...and it's kind of exciting when we do run into each other and get to catch up....my how things change. You really will grow to love it here as this place starts to become home and not just some strange place with lots of big brick buildings that your parents left you at. Really, it does get better....promise! :)</p>
<p>As a doddering old alumni, I concur with Carolina Girl. Join something. Carolina is just exactly as big as you make it. If you are a churchgoer, check out the various campus ministry offerings. If you are a musician, Carolina has scads of groups for non-majors. Investigate some of the hundreds of organizations available on campus. One of them will be full of your new best friends. Trust me.</p>
<p>uncgirl... don't worry, my D is going through the exact same thing. Everything is new and a little confusing... and you're probably feeling a little overwhelmed. This is all very natural, but hang in there.<br>
It'll take a little time, but you'll be fine.... and you'll end up loving the place. This is what everyone tells me, both current students and alumni. So be patient and know it'll only get easier. You'll see.</p>
<p>That's crazy that you haven't met new people! Maybe you aren't being crazy enough. By crazy I mean, maybe you aren't striking up random conversations with people while you're waiting for the 'walk sign to turn. Or sitting with people you've never met in the cafeteria. Or just inviting people on your hall to go get a burrito. Try it out! I've met a lot of people and it all stems from being a little crazy. No one will you think you are crazy, though, they'll probably just admire your eagerness to make friends. :)</p>
<p>Its not crazy. First you are not alone. Not all people are extroverts to the extreme who find it easy to talk to people they don't know or going and sitting with people at lunch. There is nothing wrong with it, it just makes it a little harder to get to know people. My D is the sameway and has felt lonely. She has joined some clubs which will help in the long term but joining existing groups will take time to fit in. If you are on north campus, eat at south to find some freshman. Just realize this will take time...advice I gave my D that she may or may not have taken......join a few clubs....volunteer for jobs in the clubs.....participate in activities at dorm and around campus.....attend lectures....don't be afraid to eat alone but don't bury your head in a book.....make eye contact.....say hello to everyone.....</p>
<p>Honestly, so many are there feeling like you it is just connecting with others....I wish there was a club or something that says Rams Head singles dining club for people wanting to eat with others....</p>
<p>Hang in there. If you want to pm me i can give you my D contact info...she would love to have someone to get coffee with, go to movies on campus etc or just dinner.</p>
<p>i am in the same boat as you. i am an out of stater and right know i refer to chapel hill as "chapel hell." i'm basically alone. everyone tells me how they are here with 1/2 their high school class and that really ****es me off, but i dont blame them for sticking with who they know. i joined some clubs .. but i am really losing all hope of remaining here. i miss the beach in charleston, i miss that sense of humor. no one i've met seems to have one. i've said hello to many and some dont even respond or give me a funny look. i've met new people and they are friendly, but most already have a friend group and dont seem interested in making any more. so my goal is to keep my grades are high as possible and transfer. i didnt want to, but this is ridicules. i am living on a floor with mostly upper classmen that cracked jokes about last year all during the first hall meeting. oh, and no one goes to the common room so i cant meet people there, either.</p>
<p>See the pm I just sent you. Hang in there. I promise things will improve. For now just enjoy the scenery....attend events....and stay true to who you are. Don't cop out and drink just to fit in...I know you are too smart for that...after all you are an os at carolina!</p>
<p>ahduke</p>
<p>If you haven't already tried it, attend some fraternity rush events...even if you have NO desire to go Greek. They have great food for free and there will be an opportunity to meet many OOS students. Look at Chi Psi and Delta Upsilon in particular...both are not your "typical" fraternity and both have high GPAs, many Carolina, Morehead and Robertson Scholars as members as well as members who are very active in other campus activities like student government and working on the DTH staff.</p>
<p>You need to find a way to get outside the dorm to make friends....those in your classes etc.</p>
<p>Being homesick is natural and having a period of adjustment is as well, but you also have to be actively engaged in the process of making friends. if you sit around your dorm waiting for something to happen, it won't.</p>
<p>Didn't you meet anyone at orientation or the OOS students meeting that you might like to get to know better?</p>
<p>Contact the OOS Students Association and reach out to them perhaps by getting involved on a committee or helping to plan some activity.</p>
<p>rush is this friday and i will be attending them. my OOS roommate is being recruited by chi psi at their formal rushes, but it's only because he was invited by someone already in it. we have a meeting friday about the rush process. i have joined clubs including the greek club (not frat, but greek americans) and i am the granville rep of the college republicans. i haven't just sat in my dorm, though i have at night cause i have nothing else to do. </p>
<p>i attended the last orientation .. and no, i met no one in my group that was out of state and was from the US. We had a few Chinese, a brazilian, a russian, and four from korea. i kid you not. maybe i just have bad luck.the rest were from north carolina and all of them had at least one friend from their school with them.</p>
<p>i missed the OOS meeting with was the 19th because it was the last night my mother was in town and granville neglected to post the information about it till the night of.</p>
<p>Wait. How long have you been there? A week? Give it some time. And don't worry about those in-staters. If they're clinging to their high school friends, they're feeling exactly as you are right now. Trust me, they'll get sick of hanging with them within a few weeks. Seriously-- give yourself a break. It's tough to meet people-- anywhere-- at any age-- as soon as you arrive somewhere. You will, though, and you'll find your niche and a great group of friends. Relax, and just explore the campus and the town-- the pool, whatever-- it will get better. I promise. :)</p>
<p>ahduke (and others)</p>
<p>If you like live music, The Library on Franklin St is an over 18 club that features live music many nights. Being that it is over 18, the fact that you don't drink will NOT put you in an uncomfortable position. I know this because my son plays in a band that has a regular monthly Thursday night gig there. In fact,they had their first gig last Thursday night and he said the place was packed.</p>
<p>Glad to hear that you ARE reaching out....be patient....it will all come together...jack is right, the in-staters are going to get very tired of their old friends very shortly...just try to think of it as their built-in security blanket (like you might have had at Clemson) that they will eventually want to shed.</p>
<p>College is all about taking risks, trying new things, expanding your interests and growing socially as well as academically and everyone (whether they will admit it or not) are all having some doubts and feeling some degree of insecurity. Some will mask it by getting drunk, others will deal with it by secluding themselves and hoping that something changes and the rest will be just like you, taking the small steps to start a new life. Remember that is really what you are doing...starting over. The truly nice thing about that (especially when you aren't surrounded by tons of people who know you) is that you carry no baggage or preconceived opinions about you. You can be whoever and achieve whatever you want and UNC with its vast array of clubs, intramurals and social opportunities will eventually open that world to you. It just takes a little time. Do NOT be discouraged by people who appear to "have it all together" because I assure you there isn't one person in that 3750 member freshman class that does....they just are able to act like they have it together but when they go home each night and get into bed, they are all at one time or another feeling just as insecure as you do right now.</p>