As a mom of the girl I can confirm that getting flowers is important for them. And I am sure she appreciates getting it from your son and might not even noticed the size of the bouquet. It might be impractical, but special occasion gifts should be just that.
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Oh I know, I have 3 daughters as well! Back in the day I did, too, but after I got married, and it was technically my money that paid for them (well, ours), I told my husband please don’t. We also only went out for dinner on Valentine’s Day once, 33 years ago, crowded, rushed, pre fixe menu, and haven’t ever since.
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I sent our son dinner-in-a-box for Valentine’s Day: toasted sourdough rounds, bruschetta spread, artichoke and olive tapenade, cheese straws, black truffle oil, balsamic vinegar, heart-shaped pasta, vodka sauce, and baklava. I didn’t really expect him and his GF to dine in for Valentine’s Day, but they did, and said they really enjoyed the meal. (His BD was the week before and they had gone out for that so preferred to cook at home for the holiday.)
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Same, I told my husband not to get flowers for V day many years ago. And we prefer dinner at home as well. But he still gives me flowers 
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“Don’t get me anything” is a total trap. Rookie move to fall for that. 
I still remember that Christmas, we were just talking about it on Sunday!
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Why aren’t couples splitting the bill? Times have changed, shouldn’t both seek equality?
That is up to the couple to decide what they prefer. My DD and her girlfriends, all high earners, prefer that BFs pick up most of the bills. DD paid for expensive dinner for BF’s BD, got him expensive gift so it’s not the money thing at all. She wants to feel special. My DS did not date until he was able to pay for his date.
My son’s current girlfriend is a college junior, he graduated a couple of years ago and has a nice salary. My 20 year old and her boyfriend are the same age and at the same college so I think it’s more equal.
I have no idea how S and GF handle $$$. He likely earns more than her as he has his EE job plus his part time job, while she has her social media and PR jobs that seem to change fairly often.
I don’t figure it’s my business to ask and he doesn’t offer info. I suspect they spend V Day together, and they cooked it brought in takeout but have not been told.
Haven’t talked with him about it specifically but I suspect he splits the checks with his girlfriend on a pro rata basis relative to their incomes. I know he does that for rent/utilities/groceries. He inherited a frugal gene from my wife’s side of the family which is amazingly powerful.
Selective equality must be confusing.