<p>Very good post #60, sylvan! The difference between the Expected Family Contribution and what families think they can afford to contribute is the cause of much unhappiness during the process, and especially when FA letters are mailed. As is the fact that many schools simply cannot afford even to meet the remainder after the family manages to come up with the EFC. </p>
<p>If the counseling department really wants to help their students/families, they could start with a handout outlining the EFC Facts of Life for incoming hs freshmen. It should be blunt. As sylvan said, it takes a while to get used to the realities of paying for college.</p>
<p>I cannot imagine not discussing finances with our kids. We have worked for a long time to teach them fiscal responsibility, financial management, savings, budgeting, etc. My older s has developed an amazing skill for finding deals and bargains. As they got older, and on a case-by-case basis as was appropriate, we discussed real numbers (ie how much was in savings for them, how much they had in retirement-- yes, when they worked for me in my office I put their income in a Roth for them-- etc).</p>
<p>When younger s was thinking about changing majors and thinking about he asked about our earnings, we decided to be forthright with him. If he wants a similar lifestyle he needs to understand costs and income. We recently got one of those things Social Security sends out to let you know your years of qualified earnings. It lists salaries all the way back to when we first paid taxes. It was a real eye opener. Older s is making almost 5X what DH made at his age, and surely more than that for me at that age (I was still in grad school at his age earning only traineeship income).</p>
<p>You have summed it up in one of the nicest, clearest sentences the problem of EFC:</p>
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<p>I hear it all the time. I was having a conversation this week with a woman who was talking about finding a way to hide a good sum of money from FAFSA/PROFILE. A relative had passed away and she didn’t want to be “dinged” for it when her child got her FA.</p>
<p>I asked her what obligation she thought she had to pay for college and she felt that her child was very smart and didn’t want to sacrifice her family’s future to dip into their savings if there was a chance for getting free money. She wasn’t talking strictly scholarships, either. </p>
<p>I told her she had “free” money, left by a loving relative who will help them to fund their child’s education. Which I believe was the point of this relative, to help pay for their child’s college. </p>
<p>We all look to the Finaid system to help us make it affordable for our children to get an education without breaking the family bank. It does, for most of us. </p>
<p>This attitude by this woman really irritated me. If I had that amount in the bank, I wouldn’t try to hide it, but use it to the fullest to help my kids get a good education/pay some bills/etc. </p>
<p>EFC shock was big when I first ran my family’s numbers on FAFSA when my son was a senior. I wish I had done that when my kids were younger. FAFSA4Caster wasn’t available until much later and it is a great reality check for families. (Even if it doesn’t tell the whole picture.)</p>