VERY inconsiderate roommate. Venting time.

Student Lounge College Life
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<p>Okay, so I made the mistake of thinking that living with one of my better friends = a good roommate because boy, was I wrong on that one. Yes, some of my friends have told me that my situation is not all that bad, and I agree, based on what some of my friends have told me, that my situation is not nearly as bad as theirs. The problem is that I don't like putting up with my inconsiderate roommate and a lot of the smaller things she does REALLY irritates me. Here is basically a list of what she does (also keep in mind that I am a male who likes things to be relatively clean):</p>

<p>1) NEVER puts her dishes away. They will make it to the kitchen, either on that table, or on TOP of the dishwasher, but never INSIDE the dishwasher. I literally do not understand how hard it is to put your dishes in the dishwasher and take that extra 5 seconds so that it doesn't look like a disgusting mess. And mind you, the dish WILL NOT be moved to the dishwasher unless I do it myself.</p>

<p>2) Leaves lights on ALL the time. Every time she comes up the stairs or goes downstairs at night, she turns the hallway light on and will just leave it on and will NEVER turn it off. She has left it on overnight a couple of times. She might be able to wipe her ass with 20 dollar bills and pay more for electricity, but I REFUSE to pay for her blatant waste of electricity.</p>

<p>3) Refuses to compromise with me about taking night showers. She has morning work/class every day this semester at 8 am and wakes up around 6 am to shower and get ready. My room is immediately adjacent to the bathroom. I do not have to be up until 9:30 am every day. I am an incredibly light sleeper and have made her aware of this. When I asked her if she could please take night showers so that the shower and her hair dryer won't wake me up, she just tells me that a night shower would "wake me up too much." She is incredibly non-confrontational and I know for a FACT that she will never bring up the subject again.</p>

<p>4) Is completely ignorant and oblivious to how her Netflix usage is eating all of our bandwidth. Our internet in our apartment sucks, we both know it. What she does not seem to be aware of is the fact that every time she watches Netflix, the internet basically becomes unusable for me. This would not really be an issue except for the fact that she watches Netflix pretty much EVERY SINGLE DAY. Once again, I tried explaining this to her, but she refuses to believe that it is the Netflix that is the problem and is currently watching Netflix right now...once again refusing to compromise with me.</p>

<p>Those are pretty much my main complaints. Yes, I know communication is key, but believe me, I have tried. She refuses to compromise with me on anything that might inconvenience her even in the slightest, when she has been the one that has been inconveniencing me and just likes to live in her own little oblivious world where as long her life is not inconvenienced, nothing that she does matters, regardless of how it affects the people around her. Just needed somewhere else to vent. Sorry if it seems like I'm complaining about very minute things, but stuff like this really gets to me.</p>

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She doesn’t have to compromise with you when she takes showers. She can take a shower WHENEVER she wants to. Get some headphones. </p>

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Get better internet. If two people can’t stream videos at the same time, something needs to change.</p>

<p>Change how you react to her. If you really can’t stand her, move out.</p>

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<p>I agree with niquii77. You seem too uptight about most of this. Get some earplugs and an ethernet cable, and consider asking her to pay a larger percentage of the electricity bill if her habit of leaving lights on is really causing a dent in your budget. </p>

<p>The dishes thing… Literally every group of roommates with a kitchen deals with this issue. If you’re the one who has a problem with it, maybe you should suggest a cleaning schedule. Not everyone conforms to the idea that you have to clean up your dishes right after you use them, but most people are cool with having a designated cleaning day every week or two as long as you give them a day that works with their schedule and only requires basic stuff (taking out trash, doing dishes, wiping down kitchen countertops). </p>

<p>I’ve had roommates who wanted me to vacuum the entire living room, clean every surface in the kitchen, and scrub the shower/toilet every two weeks, to which I basically implied “I’m not doing that, take your head out of your rear end and calm the hell down.” The key to successfully living with others is compromise, so it’s important to realize when you’re holding other people to unreasonable expectations.</p>

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<p>How is this a compromise? You’re telling her that she’s not allowed to take showers when she’s used to (and when it fits her schedule)-- what exactly are you compromising on?</p>

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<p>I understand how this bothers you. But you’re overreacting about the shower situation. She can take showers whenever she wants. You telling her when to shower is like telling her what time she needs to go to bed lol. Sorry to be so blunt.</p>

<p>Honestly communication is key. You need to let her know about the dish problem. You should ask her if you guys can make an “internet schedule” so that you can each set up times to use the internet so that its not slow. If you really can’t stand her do you think you could find another place?</p>

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<p>Yeah, some of these things are annoying but it could be worse. I feel you on the dishes thing, but it wasn’t worth my blood pressure to keep fighting it. I just take care of them because it’s less stressful than constantly being ****ed off. </p>

<p>The shower thing is absolutely ridiculous on your part though. I am also a night shower kind of person and if my roommate told me to change the schedule that I’ve done my whole life, I’d tell them to politely shove it. </p>

<p>The Netflix isn’t the problem. Your internet is the problem. Get the company to fix it or upgrade the package. Netflix shouldn’t be causing issues on any relatively modern equipment and plan.</p>

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<p>Can you switch bedrooms? Ask her to use the hair dryer in her room. If the shoe was on the other foot would you make the switch and shower at night? How would you react if she said that you should get up earlier to accommodate her schedule? I suspect you would also ignore the suggestion.</p>

<p>For the dishes, stop cleaning them. At some point, you will run out of dishes. If you continue to provide free maid service, then why would you expect her to change? A work schedule as suggested above could help.</p>

<p>I agree about the lights but life to too short to stress about the little things. I would let it go. It could be worst. I had roommate that would set the heat on 72 and then open the windows because they were too hot. Needless to say daddy was paying the bills.</p>

<p>For the internet you might be able to adjust the settings of your router to prioritize the traffic. If what you need doesn’t take much bandwidth then this shouldn’t impact her streaming. I am not suggesting that you use the router to kill her Netflix access. She has the right for her fair share.</p>

<p>Bottom line, focus on find solutions that are acceptable to both of you. So far you seem focused on your needs just as she is on hers.</p>