Violated (Grades)

<p>Okay, so I was grabbing a DVD out of my roommate's backpack tonight (she was at work, told me I could take it). I stumbled upon a piece of paper with the last 6 digits of my student ID # as well as another roommate's last 6 digits. Wondering WHY in the world she would have these two numbers, I called my other roommate into the living room and asked if she knew why other roommate had our ID numbers. She had no idea, and we weren't sure if we should be upset or think nothing of it.</p>

<p>We set the paper on her desk and left a note asking "why do you have our numbers?" She came home from work, saw the note, and said "oh I just wanted to know how you guys did on the last two quizzes and last exam so I know where I stand in the class. i think i should stop studying with XXXXXX and start studying with you two, you seem to know what you're doing more than me and i have to get into med school." </p>

<p>She thought absolutely nothing of it. The two roommates are in the same program and I'm in the same department, so we have a lot of classes together and sometimes we'll speak generally of how we're doing in the class (nothing specific), but she's always asking how we did and keeps pestering until we finally just ignore it and try to get on. It is NONE of her business what our grades are.</p>

<p>Needless to say, there's now very awkward tension in our apartment. I've been friends with this girl since elementary school, and I never thought she would do something like this. Maybe me and other roommate are overreacting, but we both feel like our privacy was violated here. If I wanted her to know my grades, I'd tell her. </p>

<p>Thoughts? Ideas? How do I avoid the awkwardness now since she seems oblivious to the fact that we are upset about this.</p>

<p>First, why in the world does she think that is ok?</p>

<p>Second, how did she find your student ID numbers?</p>

<p>I would be extremely bothered by that. It would make me wonder what else she takes of my things (does she know my bank account # or social security #) and if she is going through my things.</p>

<p>I would tell her that you rather her ask you in the future instead of taking it upon herself to steal your ID number and sneak around.</p>

<p>If she's that competitive maybe she posts here =/</p>

<p>I wouldn't think much of it, though I would have preferred that she just ask me rather than get my digits.</p>

<p>What else is accessible with the ID? At my daughter's school her personal info including financial aid etc is accessible with her ID. You might want to ask for a new ID number.</p>

<p>are you sure you even trust her response? it seems a tad bit suspicious to me</p>

<p>I think you're over-reacting. It's just an ID-number. she could've gotten it online or somewhere.</p>

<p>the swooping of the student ID number might be a bit of a problem. also, if your roommate is asking you what you got in your classes because she wants to gauge how much you can help her with the same coursework. get over your hypersensitivity and tell her what you have in the class, jesus. who cares if she knows what you have?</p>

<p>I think it's absolutely inappropriate for her to be checking up on your grades without your permission.</p>

<p>You should sit her down and have a frank (if not aggressive) talk about it. I would just tell her that you feel that your grades are private and that you would be happy to study with her (if that's the truth) but that she shouldn't ask you about them or look them up online. I'd do it soon, if you wait too long it'll look like you're bringing up an old grudge.</p>

<p>yeah, totally inappropriate on her part!
I'm sure it's against your school's policy for her to be doing this.
How did she obtain your ID #s? (Just go through your stuff and find your IDs?)</p>

<p>pearlygate, I'm not sure what school you go to, but at some universities your ID number is used for a lot of things. For example, at mine, most of the security confirmations for school sites require the last four digits of your ID, or even the entire thing. It's really not a trivial matter.</p>

<p>And no, Ilikedice, if she wants to keep her grade a secret, she has a right to. Why the hell is she obligated to reveal information she'd rather not? Has nothing to do with ultrasensitivity.</p>

<p>I agree it is a serious thing. Almost everything about my daughter can be accessed with her ID and password. Grades, personal information, financial information, bursars account. If it were my daughter I would want her to get the number changed ASAP. Though she does need to use a password - does your ID # not require the use of a password?</p>

<p>swimcatsmom, it sounds to me like the prof probably sends out emails or posts their grades online w/ ID #s instead of names, so students simply look for their ID # to find their most recent score on a test.
Actually, though, my school's online class system (which is separate from our main student account) sets your username to your ID and your default password to your first name! ...This means if you know someone's name and ID you can easily get into their class....or, if you know a TA's ID and name (assuming they haven't changed their password), you could actually change people's grades!!!</p>

<p>If my roommate did that, I would have read him the Riot Act, and then gone out and gotten a new ID number.</p>

<p>Agreed with futurenyustudent.</p>

<p>That crosses the line so egregiously I'm appalled that she thinks it's ok. I'd make it clear immediately that what she did was absolutely unacceptable; ask her what she'd think about you taking her SSN without permission to check her credit score, or something. Tell her what a ridiculous violation of trust it is. And then tell her that if it or something like it happens again, you'll complain to the administration at your school.</p>

<p>And then, email her the link to this thread, so if she complains that you're overreacting, you can point out how most people agree.</p>

<p>She probably got it because I've made a habit of tossing my ID card on the counter when I get home from the rec or dinner or somewhere else that needs an ID card. Won't be doing that anymore...hopefully the card office lets me get a new number even though I know it'll be a hassle to get things changed. Worth it in the end.</p>

<p>My professor posts the grades online through a spreadsheet that we can download and it has the last 6 digits of ID numbers as identification. We use our school e-mail addresses to access most secure sites for school and our Student ID number is used to access our U-Bill, Fin Aid, Transcripts, Course Schedule, Housing sign-up, etc. on a program called Access Plus. AP requires a password though and I've NEVER written down the password. </p>

<p>I'm pretty sure she can't do anything else with the number and that she doesn't have any other numbers (I don't leave my wallet or anything like that laying around), but it's the crossing the line that has me (and other roommate) so upset about this. It's a known fact in the program (only about 15 students/grade) that you can't tell her anything personal because it will get out to everyone and that she's hands-down the most competitive about her grades. If she wants to study with us, fine, whatever, I'm happy to help out. But she could just ask to study some time with us and ask a general question about our grades. I'm more than happy to tell someone I'm doing "good" or "bad" but I don't like telling how I did on a specific exam and I don't ask others how they did. To me it's just a personal thing that only me and my parents (who pay tuition) really need to know.</p>

<p>Total violation of your privacy. She accessed to your personal info and knows where you send. BAADDDD mistake to try and ruin a good friendship unless you can forgive her. I would be very, very upset and it would take me a while to forgive someone.</p>

<p>I would get a new ID number- who knows if she's been passing them around to your other classmates.</p>

<p>That attitude of hers isn't going to get her anywhere.</p>

<p>this is not ok.</p>

<p>I also think its REALLY inapproperiate. I can't believe she just thought it was alright to check my grades, I would think its REALLY REALLY RUDE.</p>

<p>So, now that it's been a couple days, an update. My other roommate who had her ID number told another friend here, and somehow word got back to their program director (who is also their advisor AND the instructor for class in question) about the situation and the roommate who took the ID numbers was given a serious, formal, parents-notified warning of academic dishonesty. She's on thin ice now and if she does it again (or anything similar), she's out of the program. </p>

<p>She can't use our ID numbers for anything but looking at the scores, which the school feels isn't enough to warrant the process of changing ID numbers--apparently this takes several weeks and has to be approved many times. So we've asked our instructor to assign the two of us random 6-digit numbers that only we will know. This way our grades will be posted with the others but there will be no way of our roommate finding out which number is ours.</p>

<p>Hopefully it's settled now.</p>