Warning for Students of Color/Women/Queers/Low-Income Students Interested In Colby

Colleges and Universities A-Z Colby College
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Hey Y’all,

I am a current juniorwho has attended Colby for the past 2 years, but am now taking a semester off due to the oppressive environment. Let me tell you a bit about myself. I am from Houston Texas, and received a POSSE scholarship to attend the Colby. I was pulled in by the promise of a beautiful campus, amazing academics, and a friendly environment. I really only got one and a half of those. While at Colby I was the president of my class for 1.5 years until I resigned to become the President of our LGBT club, The Bridge. As someone who has dealt with the inner workings of the institution, I feel that I have some sound advice to give.

First off let me start by saying that Colby is an overwhelmingly white and overwhelmingly wealthy campus. I knew that I was going to be in the middle of Maine, which is the whitest state in the United States, however, was not prepared for Colby. I often joked that I felt like one of the few Oreo pieces in the cookies and cream candy bar. It wasn’t just the whiteness that got to me, It was the micro aggressions and blatant ignorance of many of the students. I was told my first week of class by two white girls that I was the first intelligent black person they had ever had a conversation with. During my time in SGA, I had people tell me that, After looking at all old Instagram photos of me, they thought that my straight hair looked more presidential than my natural hair. And other things.While I’ve Hadn’t been in the racial majority of any school since intermediate school, Being a Colby was the first time where I was the only student of color in the classroom. Many times I felt that my classmates felt that I was not as smart as them, put down my ideas; at other times, such as in my sociology class, I had to lead the entire class in the discussion about race because my professor was not able to, and no one wanted to respond to him.

At Colby, Many students of color spend their time in the Pugh Center, which is a club space used by many organizations at Colby, where many people feel at home. A lot of white students avoid the Pugh Center because they feel that they are not welcome When actually they are just intimidated by being in the minority. Tour guides also skip this center on their tours because they do not find it important. However, the space has been crucial to me. I feel that many white students are Colby, Although they love to major in Spanish, Don’t make any real attempts to get outside their comfort zone and socialize with black, latinx, or other minority students. While I myself do have white friends, they are not your typical Colby students.They are mainly queer or nerdy or grew up with poc.The preppy, Straight out of boarding school culture doesn’t appeal to me, but is not very accepting also.

I feel that students of color are merely used as opportunities for learning for white students and marketing tools.As a part of SGA, And As a person who worked in the admissions office for a while, I was always kind of in the front seen helping out with things. However, I felt that I was often being put there because I was one of the only black faces. Also, several people have sent me pictures of Colby publications with my face on it. I did not give them permission to use these photos, nor was I paid for them. There was one point where the Colby website literally showcased every single student of color in a photo. It was so misleading it made the school to be so much more diverse than it actually was. I talked to the head of communications about this, and she said that they were just trying to draw in more students of color. However, they do not have enough resources to support us.

As far as the dating scene, Men of color are usually sexualized/fetishized.A lot of white girls find it an accomplishment. However, most women of color are ignored when it comes to romantic life, Both in a dating sense (even though no one really dates at Colby) and in the hook up sense. I’ve seen many gorgeous women of color get passed over for mediocre white women, Both by men of color and by white men. Many of us feel stuck, Made to feel unattractive and undesirable in this foreign land.

During my time at Colby there have been several-racist events. Most recently, a group of senior football players decided to throw up “Back to Africa” party, where the party invitation said to come and gather around the watering hole to watch the beasts wash off the sweat of the day. -_- They begrudgingly gave an apology. There was also a senior who decided to publicly disrespect our only black female Dean on our online civil discourse, for the most bogus reason ever.There was also an incident two years ago where two black students were assaulted on a bus coming back from a Frat party (we have annoying underground frats). My freshman year there was an incident where a genderqueer student was assaulted by some Jocks, who threw ice at them through the window. When they tried to get an apology, The athletes started to choke them and attempted to cut their hair. The result of this being reported was the student who was assaulted getting charged with a penalty, while little to nothing happened to the assaulters.

Also, I feel that there is just a lack of understanding and consideration.This past semester I created a natural hair club at Colby, Which many black women /WOC rejoices in, and had a beautiful time. However, I faced some backlash because some people thought the club was too discriminatory. They said that Colby didn’t have a blonde hair blue eyes club, so why should Black women with curly hair get their own club? First of all, Colby is the blond hair blue eyes club. Everything about the institution upholds that. However, what scared me is that people were talking like that actually had a claim - they did not want us to exist.

However, I also feel that it was very hard for me as a black woman to make other black friends. Many of the people of color here were socialized in whiteness, so they feel that they can be the only black person in their friend group. I have actually had people go out of their way to not talk to or have interactions with me. Mind you, we are 3% of the population, so you notice quickly. I messaged one girl asking why she was avoiding talking to me, Genuinely wondering why she did not want to be part of my hair club, and she simply told me to stop messaging her because it was harassment. I feel that this environment sets people against each other Because there’re only so many coveted spots for minority students to enter these friend groups.

While this is a fairly small campus, and there are some queers, many of whom in the closet. Those of us who are out are out and proud.However, there is a fair amount of homophobia on this campus. Colby’s gender-neutral bathrooms were vandalized this year, and there are always homophobic slurs being thrown around. Also, as a person heavily involved in the Jewish community, I have seen anti-Semitism. I heard one athlete being called a “dirty Jew,”. Also, many people refuse to acknowledge our Rabbi even though he has done so many things for our campus and gave a benediction at the Obama;s last Channukah party!!

PLEASE READ COMMENTS FOR PARTS 2/3

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I talked to the bit about Colby’s elitist attitude.Basically half of the students come from the top 1%, and you can believe that they like to keep their friend circle that way. If you can’t talk about daddy’s Yacht, heli-skiing, or what exotic location you were going to for spring break, do not expect to be friends with them. A lot of things at Colby leave out low-income students.For one, even though it may seem like a small thing, Colby definitely has a dress code. In fact, you could say that many people look the same. On campus, you can see the girls sporting these workout leggings, Running shoes, and Patagonia fleece, while many guys wear these khaki shorts, Pastel colored Vineyard vines button down shirts and Sperrys.There are a few people who break the mold, Most of the population looks like this, and if you dress differently you will be stared at. It was actually funny, One day I was wearing a Patagonia fleece and I actually saw how people treated me differently. It was like all of a sudden that I had money and I was part of them. Or, one day I decided to do a social experiment, wearing pink and blue striped button-down, Some light colored jeans, and some Sperrys. I got so many compliments that day, but I just said: “Oh this is my unoriginal look.” Their faces when I said that was HILARIOUS! They were actually offended.

Also - going back to the immense privilege at Colby is the topic of DORM VANDALISM. On any weekend or even a rare week night, you can find students (mainly white male athletes), knocking down exit signs, breaking vending machines, pulling fire alarms, lighting furniture on fire, and just doing dumb shit, simply because they feel that they can and their parents will pay for the damages. These acts of vandalism cost Colby’tty
s\ HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of dollars in damages each year. You would think that with all of their money and fancy education these kids would have been taught home training, etiquette, or decent manners, but no. I once had to scream for someone to leave my dorm at 3AM because they were breaking someone’s drying rack -_-. THERE IS 0 ACCOUNTABILITY.

Besides all of this, Colby is just a generally unfriendly place. At first, people are nice and seem nice - THEY ARE BEING FAKE. At Colby, people will not look you in the eye, smile, or acknowledge your existence when you pass them outside of class. They don’t really care about getting lunch with you unless if you are one of the types of people I mentioned before. everything seems to fall on deaf ears, although I have met about 3 genuinely kind people, who checked up on me after Hurricane Harvey and during my depression.Most conversations stay on the surface level because no one cares to push them deeper. I was there for 2 years and felt like I didn’t really “know” anyone. It made suffering through the winter that much worse. Colby is a very artificial environment.

There are many people who benefit from Colby, Both the academics and the social aspect. I have friends who are students of color, who have their rich white friends take them on vacations and fly them to places, however, they know that it is in exchange for them being the token within their group, The filling a certain role, and not speaking up when racist or sexist things are said. People at are Colby you’re very touchy, They do not really like to talk about race or any real topic because they don’t want to be labeled as and -ist. Unless that’s environmentalist or feminist.

Also, Something that you probably won’t hear about is that Waterville, in general, is not a very friendly area towards nonwhites.You can see Confederate and Nazi flags being flown around the back of pickup trucks. Also, there were a bunch of KKK flyers passed around at the end of last semester, The town responded with an anti-KKK rally, but just the fact that it happened in the first place was enough to spook me.I have been followed around Walmart because people think that I’m going to steal something, and my family and I have been openly gawked at when eating out of the restaurant.These are small things, but they can definitely make me feel out of place.

Many of my frustrations at Colby come from students and not necessarily in the administration, however, they do slack a lot, specifically on the topics of reporting of sexual Assault. Many times these reports are investigated by an “unbiased” Investigator hired by Colby, Who almost always rule in favor of the person who committed the assault. I know several people who transferred because Colby Refused to punish their rapists.I’ve heard of several of my friends being drugged parties, usually hosted by hockey. There was one guy, who I was interested in my freshman year but was warned about, because he had five no contact orders. That means that this person was more than likely accused of five counts of sexual assault, or someone reporting five times. It doesn’t matter the same person, or separate people, those people should not be allowed to stay at the school, however, they have money - what do you think is going to happen?

Well, this does sound very negative, but I have definitely had some amazing experiences, at Colby.If there’s one thing that Colby does have, that is money.If there’s something you want to do, then do it. I got funding to do an independent research in Israel, I raised $16,000 in one week to coordinate for pride week, I received funds for natural hair club, Basically, if you want to do something you can do it. Colby has amazing counseling services, which helped me do my many bouts of depression as well as other services, nutritionist, trainers, etc. .I would not have survived Colby if not for Rabbi Rachel Isaacs and her wife Mel. I highly suggest taking her Hebrew class or anything in the Jewish Studies/Religious Studies department.The faculty really do care and that matters. Also there are some AMAZING staff. I loved my custodians, food workers, etc. They made my day honestly. Ask anyone at Colby about Andre and they will have good things to say.

While Colby is generally cold in attitude, there is a large group of POC/queers/cool peeps who support each other. They can usually be found in the Pugh Center. They also helped me alot, but then again sometimes it can feel like a fishbowl, and everything has its limitations. Maybe if Colby was a bit bigger I could have found my “people” and not have gone through the things I did.

I thought about transferring from Colby many times, and who knows, I may. However, There is something about my department, The good people that I have met, and especially all of the exciting things in the course catalog that make me not want to leave. However, I’ve had to realize that I do not have to suffer in order to get a good education.

I wrote this because I want to help all of you who are thinking about applying to Colby. Please feel free to respond with any questions and I’ll answer them to the best my ability or direct you to someone who can.

I feel that like Kanye, I’m too Black, I’m too vocal, I’m too flagrant. If you are also like this, Colby may not be the place for you, but who knows. Everyone’s experience is different, but many share my sentiment.

I apologize for any punctuation, spelling, capitalization, or grammar errors. I promise Colby teaches you how to write, but I have Carpal Tunnel and physically cannot stand the process of editing this entire thing.

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So, what’s the rebuttal here? Colby is our first choice. What do others think?

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Wow. This is a very strong indictment. :frowning:

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OP, I’m sorry you’ve had such a rough time.

I know nothing about Colby. But it has been my experience that people who write reviews tend to write bad ones. People who have had a good experience-- at a college, a movie, a restaurant, anywhere-- tend to pat themselves on their backs and smile about their good judgement. But people who have had a bad experience tend to be so angry that they want the world to know.

Or, in other words, I suspect “your mileage may vary.”

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I looked up some graduation rates on Colby’s common data set.

For the class entering 2009, 94% graduated after 6 years. The 6 year graduation rate was 90% for the class that entered in 2008.

These graduation rates are very high, so the vast majority of students are satisfied.

College can be a very lonely place. Sweetthang13542’s problems are not unique, and something that she might experience at any of the NESCAC colleges. I hope she remembers the positives of Colby, returns, finds her niche, and graduates.

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“These graduation rates are very high, so the vast majority of students are satisfied.”

The vast majority of graduates at Colby aren’t POC, which is a big part of the issue for the OP. It would be interesting to see the data parsed for race but unfortunately Colby doesn’t seem to publish such data as that detail is left blank on the website: http://www.colby.edu/administration_cs/ir/consumerinfo/student-information-details.cfm

I’m honestly not surprised by much of the descriptions/experiences. However, I do agree that the experience painted above - lack of diversity both racially and socio-economical - would not be limited to Colby. Colby is more isolated and rural and more preppy than many schools. The uniform part made me chuckle. Too true. Unfortunately, a lot of the stupid comments directed at the OP by classmates area problem with society at large in this country.

It’s hard for places like Colby to fix these issues without significant commitment. It’s a bit of a Catch-22. Without attracting more diversity - in many forms - things won’t get better, but because the experience is lacking currently, it’s hard to attract that diversity. I will say that not all small LACs are this way or as extremely homogeneous as Colby.

Good luck, @sweetthang13542. I hope you either transfer to someplace with a social environment that is a better fit for you or you use the supports you’ve developed to finish your degree at Colby. Either way, don’t let these obstacles keep you from achieving your goals.

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I am not sure that all small LACs are not like this. I would love to hear from POC who have different experiences at other small LACs. The percentage of minorities is tiny at most of them, no?

Colby was also on our list, but it was always a reach, and this doesn’t endear it to us, though we are white. Our D is more like the OP than not.

OP, I’m sorry for your experiences but you do sound centered and strong and able to find the positives in your situation and make the place work for you, which speaks well of your character and future.

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Just pulling out another LAC, somewhat at random but one in which I know there is a little bit more diversity and much less preppy of a culture:

Let’s compare the CDS of Colby and Wesleyan from 2105-16 (Wesleyan has more recent data posted but Colby doesn’t)

Colby
Total Student Body 1,857
Black 49 2.6%
Hispanic 119 6.4%
Asian 115 6.2%
Two or more races, Non-hispanic 94 5.1%

Wesleyan
Total Student Body 2,897
Black 225 7.8%
Hispanic 307 10.6%
Asian 237 8.2%
Two or more races, Non-hispanic 166 5.7%

So, for a black student, there is a decently sized difference between the 2 schools above, both in percentage but also in just the absolute number of black faces on campus, some due to size differences in the student bodies but some due to institutional acceptance practices and the ability to attract POC to campus. There are close to 5x as many blacks students on Wesleyan’s campus as Colby’s. Plus, less geographic isolation and being located in a more diverse area, would allow for more off-campus opportunities to be among other POC. OP would still be a minority on campus but I doubt the degree to which she would feel so isolated would be as great.

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Let’s also compare tiny Haverford to the Colby numbers above.

Haverford
Total Student Body 1,233
Black 86 7.0%
Hispanic 118 9.6%
Asian 120 9.7%
Two or more races, non-hispanic 50 4.1%

So, even tiny Haverford is kicking Colby’s butt on the diversity front. Plus, Haverford’s location close to Philly allows for opportunities for cultural/social connections to POC that doesn’t exist in Waterville, ME.

Colby is very homogenous even by LAC standards.

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@sweetthang13542: I think that your post is valuable to a number of high school students who might be drawn in by the names and rankings of some of the top ranked schools (whether a LAC or a bigger school), but who might not actually be comfortable if they went there. To me it emphasizes an important point which has also been hinted at in some other threads: A ranking is just a number. It doesn’t say much about what the school is like for a student who attends there. Students need to find a good fit for them.

“If you can’t talk about daddy’s Yacht, heli-skiing, or what exotic location you were going to for spring break, do not expect to be friends with them.”

For what ever it’s worth, there are plenty of people who are in the top 1% who would be very uncomfortable with a discussion about any of these subjects (and who don’t have a yacht and have never heli-skied and wouldn’t want to). From what you have said I suspect that there are also plenty of students from the top 1% who would not be comfortable at some of the more “preppy” of the LACs (even if they would excel at a different LAC).

Obviously you are an articulate person who I expect is also a strong student. I am sorry that you didn’t find a better match for a school. From what you have said I am quite happy that we ended up going a different way (we thought of Colby for one daughter who wanted a small school, but didn’t end up applying).

@Gatormama said: “This doesn’t endear it to us, though we are white. Our D is more like the OP than not.”

I feel the same way. We are white and as far as I know not particularly gay or lesbian. However, even with these differences I think that our D’s are probably more like the OP than not in terms of what environments our daughter’s would find comfortable. As one example, I think that my D’s reaction to dorm vandalism would be almost exactly the same as OP’s.

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Colby has been working very hard on diversity and inclusion over the past several years and has made real progress. Not enough, and the work continues as there is still much to be done., The challenge of attracting POC to this part of the world is the first hurdle. The diversity numbers here, sadly, are comparable at most more isolated schools. Maine (and Vermont), while the definition of paradise for many, can feel very uncomfortable to others. (Just had this conversation with non-white colleagues this week.)

I am sorry, OP, that it has not been a good experience. Being at a school where you feel you don’t fit can be miserable. It sounds like you have found some sources of joy, and I hope these sustain you through graduation. I suspect that many of the people who were friendly to you meant well and were genuine. I am glad you connected with 3 of them. As you note, there are students who are not white who have friends and are having a different experience. And no doubt, there are genuinely obnoxious folks as well.

@Gatormama , I would suggest you check it out for yourself. I have met quite a few Colby students from different backgrounds who are very happy there. With that said, I also know students - including preppy white ones - who visited and felt it was not right for them and didn’t apply. At most small schools, there is a “vibe”. You need to figure out if it’s the right one for you. If this has raised issues you will want to ask about and explore further, it has been useful. And at isolated schools, if the vibe isn’t right, there is not much of an alternative, so do your homework.

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Sweetthang13542’s post is a reminder that whatever a college says about their commitment to diversity, particularly New England LACs, many may talk a good game but still have a long way to go. Even to this day, a lot of these schools still cater to the privileged, white upper class who want to send their progeny to the “proper” college to start their careers in law and finance. Many have a Neanderthal “lax bro” subculture of athletes who have never been told “No” or been denied anything in their lives. I would think twice about sending our minority children to a such a school.

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I was lucky enough to attend Wesleyan in the early seventies. I say lucky because Wesleyan had a twenty year head start on recruitment of African-Americans and Latinx students before there was anything like the USNews rankings which IMO have exercised a conservative influence on higher education - but, that’s a subject for a different thread. Demographically, it was probably not that different from Colby today; Wesleyan was still 80% white as late as 1990. Nevertheless, it was enough to earn it the nickname, “Diversity University” for years after I graduated. There were plenty of accusations of micro-aggressions (even though, we didn’t have a word for it back then) and I suspect there still are. The big difference, I think, is that Wesleyan was also doing its best to diversify its white students. Half my white friends were first generation college and a good portion of the other half were Jewish (like the OP, I have very fond memories of the first Jewish Chaplain at Wesleyan, the late Rabbi George Sobelman - and his wife, Nina.)

We didn’t have nearly the perspective folks now have on gender identity (Wesleyan was a mostly male school at the time) and that’s obviously another layer of isolation. Hey. What can I say? Everyone has their tolerance for pain. The OP has to decide what her own is, keeping in mind that her education should come first. Colby offers some wonderful opportunities, if she can grit her teeth and bear the rest of it. She doesn’t have to make friends with the entire college. But, if, and especially if , it’s affecting her studies, she should consider transferring.

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As a parent of a daughter who is a junior, we are not the 1%… my daughter is the farthest thing from preppy you will ever find. We are not from New England, do not own either a boat, plane or any clothing from Vineyard Vines or Patagonia. My daughter shops at Goodwill. Colby is not Vassar or Wesleyan. My son attended Vassar. I do not think she has ever discussed anyone’s wealth or status. I’m fairly certain she couldn’t care less. I think my daughter would say that Colby is not as diverse as some other LACs. However, all that said, she does have some fairly diverse friends and definitely seeks them out. She does not play any sports and actually couldn’t if she wanted to - we lack that gene in our family. She does not ski, although she has tried it ( in borrowed clothes and Colby paid for the ski rental and lift ticket). I am stressing here, she is NONE of the things mentioned in the original post. She has grown up in NYC and loves theater and nightlife.
She LOVES, LOVES, LOVES Colby. No question, it is what you make of it… she was accepted at other more progressive schools and did give those much consideration, but she did not want that type of homogeneous environment- she saw the “Vassar” experience first hand and wanted something else. She has grown to love the outdoors (still doesn’t own any appropriate clothing for Maine winters)… she goes into Portland and shops at the used clothing stores. She is currently abroad (Colby’s abroad program was one of things that drew her to the school) and having the time of her life. Maybe what sets her apart is she truly does not care what anyone else thinks about her choices. She thrives on being different and has so many friends who share her academic interests and crazy joy. I understand that Colby is precieved as a white, privileged school by some (I confess I thought so as well when my daughter was applying) but that is not entirely true of this school. I’m not interested in debating my account… I know that the OP is truly unhappy and should transfer if possible, I am only proving a glimpse into another prospective from a very different student who has embraced her time at Colby.

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“The big difference, I think, is that Wesleyan was also doing its best to diversify its white students.”
I think this is important to repeat. Some LACs make more of an effort and are more successful at this than others. It does result in different vibes.

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This is indicative of basically every college and the ‘Hookup’ scene. Read Lisa Wade’s American Hookup as the demographics of the Hookup scene are discussed at large. But alas that is also a topic for another post but I thought the original poster might find the book interesting.

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^^ Fwiw, and not to invalidate the OP’s feelings, I recently had a conversation with someone who has spent 2 decades working as a college chaplain and as a dean of diversity and inclusion. His comment was that everyone articulated that they felt excluded in these residential communities. Even the people who were seemingly in the majority. Because yes, while one race may be the predominant race, it includes different wealth, religious, sexual orientation and identification, political leanings, artsy, sporty, nerdy, etc.

This is a real problem not just on college campuses, but in society. But college campuses can do better, not just in helping create their own communities, but in teaching young people how to build them. Very few of us know how to have the conversations we need to have – they are uncomfortable and the fear of saying the wrong thing make silence and superficiality much easier. We can control what we say and what we mean but not how it’s heard, and that creates minefields!

I am grateful for the efforts being made, even if progress is glacial. These students are our future. They have to do it better and we have to support them. .

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I’m sorry you’ve been unhappy at your college. Some of the attitudes and actions that you related are truly dreadful. It’s unfortunate any college student has to deal with immature, irresponsible behavior.

However, it might be helpful for you to reflect on some of your own attitudes and assumptions. There are numerous comments in your posts where you assert what other people are thinking. White students don’t use the Pugh Center because they’re “intimidated by being in the minority.” Tour guides don’t visit it because they don’t find it “important.” Black men are “fetishized” and white girls consider it an accomplishment to date them. Whites have a “token” black in their friend group and treat them to expensive trips with the understanding that the black student is giving up their right to object to racist or sexist comments. I suspect you’re using interactions with a few students to generalize the behavior of the other ~1800 on campus. Some people may have those attitudes, but it doesn’t mean the campus is full of students like that.

You might also want to consider that there may be other reasons for some of the behaviors you mentioned. The Pugh Center is a facility dedicated to serving people involved in issues of race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, and spirituality, and was designed to provide meeting space for groups whose purpose meets that mission. If I visited, I wouldn’t expect to see many white students, especially white males, because they aren’t among the majority of populations the center was designed to serve. Tour guides might not have the autonomy to choose which buildings they visit. At my son’s college they don’t. At the private college where I work they don’t either. Their training teaches them where to go and what to say. It’s also possible that some tours happen while you’re in class or involved in other activities, so you wouldn’t necessarily know whether or not every tour excludes the center. It’s certainly reasonable to want the Pugh Center included on the tour. I’d contact admissions and suggest making it part of the regular tour if it isn’t already.

You were class president for 3/4 of the time you were at Colby, and that kind of position carries certain responsibilities and expectations. You can’t make fun of the way people dress and expect them to respond favorably to you. You can’t assume that every black woman will want to join your hair club and private message them multiple times after they decline to find out why. You can approach the administration about some of the egregious behaviors and issues that concern students and work towards improving campus life for all students.

You sound like an intelligent, competent person and many campuses would benefit from having you. If you’re truly unhappy at Colby, I hope you can find a campus you’ll like better.

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so @sweetthang13542 are you leaving Colby?