What do you say when someone asks where you're going?

<p>Good country song says that Friends scatter in the wind. And people who judge you on your choice of colleges aren’t even near the status of Friend.</p>

<p>I have to agree with Stever MA. I am sorry you are in a difficult situation and you do not have the parental support that you need to make your dream a reality, but you would most certainly qualify for student loans. Good luck to you!</p>

<p>Originally I was supportive of the community college idea, but when you further expressed you future educational goals and your present level of preparation, I do feel that community college might be a setback unless you are able to specifically design your course load so that every class transfers into the four year curriculum you want. </p>

<p>The other alternative is finding an AS degree that would land you a decent paying job and then you could return to school part time once you are employed.</p>

<p>‘I’m looking at all my options for financial aid. I’m sure it will be interesting where ever I go.’</p>

<p>OP, whether you end up at the CC or are able to work out financing, hold your head up. You are much more mature and prepared for life as a young adult than any of the HS classmates who might allow themselves to feel superior simply because they have more help from home. One of the life lessons of the late teens and early twenties is that you can’t make everybody understand everything. It can hurt to be misunderstood, but some of that is inevitable, and we can survive it.</p>

<p>The 12th grade classmates who don’t get it today – some of them will get it in a year when things haven’t gone well at the 4 year school, financially or otherwise. Some of them will get it in five years when they have a bachelor’s degree and they can’t pay their loans. Some will not get it until 30 years have gone by, and they have to help their own kids make hard choices. Most will get it eventually.</p>

<p>Thank you all for the responses. I went ahead and attempted to get the tax returns to fill out the FAFSA, but for the time being my parents are not willing to give me the information.</p>

<p>I looked into it, and I’m not sure how far I could go simply on the federal loans. Including the cost of food and board, I would need about 15 grand a year. The federal loan is only about 5 grand for that first year, so I’m not exactly sure how I would even be able to come up with the rest.</p>

<p>If your parents veto your college plans (by withholding information needed for the FAFSA), then you may have to wait until you are 24 or otherwise considered an independent student (e.g. married, military veteran) to be able to apply for college financial aid to attend a four year school to complete a bachelor’s degree.</p>

<p>I was under the impression that if I was providing for myself for a year, I could declare myself an independent?</p>

<p>Use the following to determine whether you are a dependent student (for the purpose of needing your parents’ information for applying for financial aid):</p>

<p>[Will</a> I need my parents’ information?](<a href=“http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/help/fftoc02k.htm]Will”>http://www.fafsa.ed.gov/help/fftoc02k.htm)</p>

<p>Read the last sentence on that link. Call the financial adviser at the school you want to attend and find out what you need to do. But it sounds like your parents really really don’t want toying to go to a 4 year school right now. I would humbly explore with them why that is.</p>

<p>Subsidized, if you do ultimately find that your only immediate higher ed option is at the community college, and you do not reasonably expect to have the means to finish the bachelor’s immediately thereafter, the AA or AS degree may not be your most strategic option at the CC. You sound like a person who will ultimately succeed with the bachelor’s and beyond. If you have to support yourself starting in your late teens, and be judicious about debt, and gradually work toward the degree, it might be best to take a technical, applied 2 year degree (AAS) or even a certificate in the computer or engineering field, which might be as few as 10 courses. This might make you much more employable, at a better rate, than the AA or AS, which is understood principally to be the first two years of gen eds for the bachelor’s, and maybe not immediately valuable to a lot of employers. Even something applied and medical, like a 2 year x-ray tech program or a phlebotomy certificate, might put you in a better place to support yourself within budget. You could then pursue higher academics from there. The right employer, such as a good tech firm or pharmaceutical company or hospital, might offer higher ed benefits.</p>

<p>You sound like a strong candidate, academically, coming out of HS. Would you be going for the bachelor’s if you had a full free ride merit scholarship, or something very close to that? You get those by applying to schools where you would be the cream of their crop, and where the school chooses to enhance their enrollment pool by offering significant money to a few. Did you not apply to such schools? If not, maybe a gap year where you apply to a new group of schools, work and save, would produce an opportunity for you. If you proceed to community college instead, you are turning yourself into a transfer student at four-year schools, and transfers are typically not eligible for significant merit aid.</p>

<p>A further observation – some of the schools where you might be a big merit aid candidate will expect the FAFSA. Some may not. I think, often, the school wants to know that governmental grants are being obtained where they can be, to keep the cost down for both sides, even when they are trying to use merit money to bring in a desired candidate. Don’t let this stop you. Some schools may not require it. Other schools might ordinarily say they require it, but might waive the requirement on a showing that the candidate would not be eligible for need-based governmental grants, in any event.</p>

<p>Call the financial aid officer at the school you want to attend. THEY can help you with this. You are not the first student to go through this, they see this every year. Start searching for outside scholarships and apply to as many as you can. You said you got a large scholarship at one school, is that enough to cover costs along with federal loans? Fact is, you are going to have to do a lot of legwork if you want to go to college. We can only help you so much. Make that call TODAY.</p>

<p>Subsidized, here is my 2c for what it is worth to you!

  1. I attended both a cc and a very well known 4 year college. The instructors at the cc were fantastic, class size was small, very individual attention. The 4 year was okay, but to be honest I enjoyed cc better, had better quality instructors, more serious students.
  2. Different state now, years later. My daughter has been a dual enrolled student since end of 9th grade and loves it. Great experience overall (one REALLY bad statistics teacher). Initially all her peers were looking down on cc as ‘not real college’ but now due to rapidly rising college costs are saying that was really smart of her. She put her nose to the grindstone, kept up her grades, finished in top 5% of 500+, all the while standing her ground and telling classmates, ‘Well, I’ll be finishing college in 2 years versus four, with little or no debt. So come see me when you are 40 and still paying off college loans.’
  3. Initially she was going to take extra semester after HS grad, finish AA and transfer to particular college. Turned out she didn’t like that college, so applied to more local college, upon their advice as a freshman (more scholarships available). Ended up with full tuition scholarship, with several other smaller scholarships which will be able to go toward room and board.
  4. Guess what? A good portion of her peers are now planning on attending our local cc before transferring to a state college (we have a 2+2 system where if you have an AA you are guaranteed a spot at state university). There are many scholarships available at cc level – particularly through Phi Theta Kappa (cc honors society).
  5. I have always told her, education it what YOU make it. It doesn’t matter whether you go private or state, cc or 4 year, there will always be bad teachers and good teachers. At least in college you can check out professor ratings and drop a class, can’t do that in high school!
  6. Cannot BELIEVE your parents will not even give FAFSA info to you. Could say more but want to be polite! Talk to financial aid office at local cc or state college, tell them outright about your situation, in a weird way, it is an amazing essay/scholarship story! There are other ways (work study, RA job on campus, etc.). Apply for as many scholarships as you can (5 $2000 scholarships is 2 years of tuition here!!). You seem very smart and grounded, so check them out.
  7. Lastly, don’t rule out the military. Married to AF enlisted who did 24 years, amazed he wasn’t booted out as he is not exactly a rule follower. His parents kicked him out of home at 17 (because he refused to cut his hair – seems so mundane now!), worked full time, went to HS at same time, graduated, joined AF after couple of years, became instructor, got 3 AA degrees, eventually BA, works as civilian now for AF. Even if you commit for 4 years, you are likely to be placed in a career field where you will get on the job training (OJT) for engineering, you can take college classes and ALL your college will be paid for, books, tuition, labs…can’t beat that.
  8. Good luck to you! We are all cheering for you – even if your parents aren’t!! Don’t give up on your education, no matter where it takes place or how long it takes.</p>

<p>OP - It sounds like you really need to talk to your parents. Why will they not help you with your FAFSA? Are they worried about you accumulating debt? Are they afraid you aren’t ready for a 4 year school? Have you been in trouble? There has to be a reason they’re COMPLETELY not supportive of this avenue.</p>

<p>Find out why. Then, if you still feel strongly about it, and they won’t budge, go talk to the financial aid person at the college. If your parents will sign a note saying they don’t support your decision - it might help. I don’t know.</p>

<p>I reread your first post and realized you have 50 hours. Going to a CC with the thought of transfer later seems sort of pointless. You already almost have an associates. NOW, with that being said, if military IS an option, go get your associates - you can probably finish in one semester, and then enlist. It’s a lot better to enlist with a degree.</p>

<p>If not, I suggest you get some face-time help with admissions and a financial aid person at the college of your choice. They may have some suggestions.</p>

<p>Perhaps a gap year, as someone else has suggested - Americorps might be a good option. Then you wouldn’t have to worry TOO much about the roof and food thing.</p>

<p>[url=&lt;a href=“http://www.americorps.gov/]AmeriCorps[/url”&gt;http://www.americorps.gov/]AmeriCorps[/url</a>]</p>

<p>@Cromette, I guess I could try calling their office, no harm in trying. </p>

<p>@Fieldsports, I guess I could look into that, but my concern would be getting into the fields of my choice at a late age. I am far from a strong candidate. My GPA is an absolute joke, and my SAT scores were nothing special. The local school I got aid from isn’t horrible, but it isn’t exactly great either (UMBC). I originally wanted to apply to some even lower schools (Morgan State, Capitol College, ETC.) but my parents did not approve of it. They encouraged me to apply to reach and medium schools, but I declined knowing that even if I got in I wouldn’t be able to afford it. I don’t know if a year off is a great idea, as I’ve destroyed myself senior year. I’ve, and I am still, convinced that I’m on a straight track to community college or no college education at all; I finished my first semester with a 1.2 GPA.</p>

<p>@Steve, I’ll make the call over the weekend, but I think they were generous enough to begin with. I’m not a highly qualified student. The scholarship was partial tuition and with federal loans I’d still be short a significant amount.</p>

<p>@Cairde, I don’t have a good relationship with them but they aren’t horrible people. I don’t really think I have any hooks for third-party scholarships. I know the military can be very generous, with respect to education, but I just can’t stand the organization. In-fact I’m not even sure if I’m going to sign-up for the selective service. It isn’t that they aren’t cheering me on, they want me to go to a four-year school, they just aren’t willing to face the facts that they can’t afford to pay for my tuition.
@Cromette, I have no idea why they won’t let me fill out the FAFSA. When I asked for the tax returns, they kind of got hostile with me and accused me of going behind their backs. They said they’d get me the papers the night I asked, but they didn’t. I brought it up again the next day and they told me they didn’t have the papers, but would ‘eventually’ get them. Which in my household doesn’t mean much. I don’t like to talk about school with them, but when they do approach me about it I have voiced that I am strongly considering community college. They retort with something along the lines of if you don’t think you’re capable of a four year college then fine go to a CC and get a remedial education. A few times I’ve lost it and made it clear that I wish I had the choice to go to a four year, but can’t because they have been immature with their finances. They continue to claim that they can afford to pay for my school, and I’m the only obstacle, but I know they’re lying to me. My sibling will be spending an extra year in school, and they already had to put his 4th year on credit cards (at a moderately expensive school). I don’t know, I just get angry when I have to deal with these issue. I understand that school can be expensive, and you shouldn’t rely on your parents for everything, but it just irritates me how they spend their funds. They can afford to purchase pompous vehicles for themselves and my sibling, and a vacation home, but they can’t afford things like this for me. That is another issue with bringing up the whole finance factor to friends. Most just retort with “but your parents are rich” and make assumptions about my inherent capabilities. I don’t’ know, I guess I know how this situation is going to end up and all I really want to do is vent, but talking about this doesn’t make me feel any better. It just makes me bitter. Thank you all for the response and advice, but you don’t need to put any more effort into this thread.</p>

<p>OP - Per your original questions… you are making a good and necessary choice, but you don’t have to discuss it if that makes you uncomfortable. Come up with a non-answer answer… “Ask me in May”, “Harvard… or another college”, whatever. Good luck with your parents.</p>

<p>Do you have a 1.2 total gpa, or just for the 1st semester of your senior year?</p>

<p>OP, maybe you’re depressed. Seems like you’re dealing with a lot. There has to be someone at your high school you can talk to.</p>

<p>The financial aid people will not be in their offices over the weekend, you need to call on a weekday. It seems like there is some disconnect between you and your parents or maybe something you aren’t telling us. If they wouldn’t allow you to apply to safety schools and now are withholding their financial information–what got missed between those two steps? Was there a condition that you bring your GPA up or something?</p>

<p>I also feel like there may be holes in the information. If my kid’s gpa was a 1.2, for her own good, I would not be supportive of her going to a 4 year school. At least not until I determined what the problem was and was able to get her to address it.</p>