<p>I have three kids with one already in college ,one a junior in high school,and one freshmen in high school.The one in college is at OOS at the U.Wisc. majoring in Economics and will graduate with over $100,000 in loans which was his choice.Now the junior in high school also wants to go to U.Wisc.and take out that much in loans also. I was against the first one taking out that much but was over ruled by others. Now the arguing has begun with #2 because I am told how can you deny #2 that he can't go there when #1 went there. #1 is very capable of repaying those loans because he has been very successful securing jobs so far from part time jobs in high school thru current internships. But #2 has never had job mostly due to Crohn's disease that causes many stomach issues and constant treatment and I fear him taking out that much in loans even though he is better student than #1.</p>
<p>If the kids are taking out that many loans are you financially supporting them? If not they really can go where they want, no matter how much you try to guide them toward somewhere else.</p>
<p>I suggest that you try to entice him into applying to some private schools where he will have a realistic chance of getting some merit money and/or FA, as well as some in-state financial safeties. Perhaps when he sees the numbers line up he will change his mind.</p>
<p>$100,000 at 8.5% (if you can get it!) with a 1% origination fee, paid off over 10 years, would require a median salary of $115,000/year during those 10 years, paying the loan off at 10% of income, or $101,000 at 15% of income.</p>
<p>How many people do you know who averaged $115,000 in their first 10 years after graduating from college?</p>
<p>mini,i know about the payback concerns ,like I said I was overruled on that choice.#2 just got his ACT score today (32) without even studying or practicing for it so I hope maybe some school comes forward with some scholarships that might change his mind.This wasn't what we had in mind but my wife had cancer treatments and then #2 was diagnosed with Crohn's which has changed our lives the last couple years which we didn't plan on financially.</p>
<p>Can an 18-yr-old GET a loan for $25K without a co-signer?</p>
<p>"This wasn't what we had in mind but my wife had cancer treatments and then #2 was diagnosed with Crohn's which has changed our lives the last couple years which we didn't plan on financially."</p>
<p>I know the issues - my wife had a very aggressive form of cancer, and I had a major heart attack in the past 2 1/2 years. But the issue is how HE will be able to pay back the loans. (I would worry for #1 too). If he understood the numbers, it might not seem all that desirable.</p>
<p>Agreed that this is a huge amount of loans for an undergraduate degree and the truth is, school loans are the only loans that follow you for life (even if you file bankruptcy). The truth is, there might be more of an issue in getting these loans with the economy the way it is as there are lots of threads on here that speak to exactly that and having to withdraw for spring semester.</p>
<p>Can you find a middle ground? Are the community colleges good in your area, and could your son then transfer to the university after 2 years? With the change in the economy, the community colleges are seeing quite an influx of students. I think a broader range of choices for your second son will be good. Keep that conversation open and avoid drawing a line in the sand. Good luck!</p>
<p>How do you tell a kid who has worked his butt off his whole life that he can't go to a good college because we have no money to help you out with.Also things might get better for us financially shortly (wife is currently of work right now ) and maybe some inheritance money down the road.</p>
<p>You do it by seeking the "NBA", next best alternative. With his scores, etc., he should come into some hefty merit money elsewhere, at a very good college, perhaps one better than UWisconsin.</p>
<p>Given UWisconsin and $100,000 in loans versus good college and much less, NBA may look more attractive TO HIM than BA.</p>
<p>There is more than one good college and more than one place to be happy at. My daughter didn't get in at her first choice but that was ok because she was accepted at many others that shared similarities and environments. If we had not been able to afford the one she is attending, she would have gone to one of the ones that gave her merit money. She would have been happy because all of the schools she applied to were of a type.</p>
<p>This is a rather long winded way of asking - What is it about U of WI that he likes? Social atmosphere? Certain departments? Sports programs? Snow? If you can isolate what he likes, then you can try to find additional colleges that share that profile.</p>
<p>In my opinion, no one with a chronic health condition should take out that much debt. A flare up could tack on a semester or two. Have him take as many AP and CLEP exams as he can. This may free up his schedule some should he get sick again.</p>
<p>If you cosigned on your older son's loans, you were not overruled. You gave in. It will be hard enough for a healthy person to pay back that amount. Some one with health issues will find it harder. Don't borrow against future inheritance. God forbid you may need it for other medical issues.</p>
<p>I really don't mean to sound harsh. There are many places where he can get a great education without being burdened with so much debt. Look at the threads for merit money for ideas on how to approach this.</p>
<p>If your question is:</p>
<p>
[quote]
Must I arrange the same financial resources for #2 as for #1?
[/quote]
</p>
<p>my answer is "No."</p>
<p>Each child is different.</p>
<p>There is more than one good college and more than one place to be happy at. My daughter didn't get in at her first choice but that was ok because she was accepted at many others that shared similarities and environments. If we had not been able to afford the one she is attending, she would have gone to one of the ones that gave her merit money. She would have been happy because all of the schools she applied to were of a type.</p>
<p>This is a rather long winded way of asking - What is it about U of WI that he likes? Social atmosphere? Certain departments? Sports programs? Snow? If you can isolate what he likes, then you can try to find additional colleges that share that profile.</p>
<p>In my opinion, no one with a chronic health condition should take out that much debt. A flare up could tack on a semester or two. Have him take as many AP and CLEP exams as he can. This may free up his schedule some should he get sick again.</p>
<p>If you cosigned on your older son's loans, you were not overruled. You gave in. It will be hard enough for a healthy person to pay back that amount. Some one with health issues will find it harder. Don't borrow against future inheritance. God forbid you may need it for other medical issues.</p>
<p>I really don't mean to sound harsh. There are many places where he can get a great education without being burdened with so much debt. Look at the threads for merit money for ideas on how to approach this.</p>
<p>"How do you tell a kid who has worked his butt off his whole life that he can't go to a good college because we have no money to help you out with.Also things might get better for us financially shortly (wife is currently of work right now ) and maybe some inheritance money down the road."</p>
<p>You tell him the truth. That's reality. That's life. Just because someone studied hard doesn't mean that they get their dreams.</p>
<p>Your S also can pursue other avenues of achieving their dream including applying for every scholarship that he might qualify for. He also can look at other colleges that may give him an experience similar to what his dream school would.</p>
<p>I don't understand why so many parents seem to think that just because a kid worked hard in school and got good grades, the kid should be able to go to whatever college the kid is accepted to. Most of us parents have worked extremely hard on jobs, in school, etc., but we still have learned to modify our dreams to fit what we can afford. That's the way the world works....</p>
<p>As for the kid with the $100 k in loans -- how could he take out those loans unless you were willing to co-sign, something that was ill advised then and is even more ill advised now.</p>
<p>"How do you tell a kid who has worked his butt off his whole life that he can't go to a good college because we have no money to help you out with."</p>
<p>This is our situation; xxx is what we can afford. If our situation changes for the better, we may be able to increase our support. There are many, many good colleges out there. We will help you identify some more affordable options.</p>
<p>I suspect that the days of easy money for college are over, as Modadunn alluded. </p>
<p>Maybe you can send him articles that we've featured on CC about kids with $100k debt and a job that can't service that debt after graduation. </p>
<p>There are times you have to be the "bad parent" and just say no. Maybe this time you won't be overruled--these tough times should make anyone pause about taking on $100K of debt.</p>
<p>I don't know that much ( hardly anything actually) about Crohn's, but I have a friend whose daughter is a college sophmore and has it. She has been in and out of school for medical reasons,sometimes for 2 weeks at a time.The University is awesome in accommodating her, but she is attending an instate public because it could take her more than 4 yrs to finish a degree with the many setbacks she has had. I hope this will not be the case for your son. Having her only 1 1/2 hrs from home has made a big difference for her and her parents when she has gotten ill and needed her parents,or had to be hospitalized, etc.<br>
The decision might need to be about health issues as well as debt.
I wish you luck. I imagine it would be difficult to tell your son he can't go. Many of us have to do so now for many reasons. I am sure he can find some other schools he would love!</p>
<p>Just say no. He'll thank you later. Parents are under no obligation to repeat the same mistake twice. That's how I feel with my kids. S #1 will have more paid for his college than kids #2-7. Kid #2 is a senior and she limited her college choices according to financial limitations that we didn't have with S#1. No complaints from her. She understands reality. I would encourage my kids to avoid ANY undergrad debt if at all possible. Certainly going to an out-of-state public u is not worth $100,000 in loans when you're paying taxes to support your instate colleges.</p>
<p>What's wrong with the state schools in your state? You've been paying taxes to support them so you should seriously consider benefiting from them.</p>
<p>I also wonder - what is it about UW that your second S (or first S for that matter) is so enamored with? I'm not saying anything's wrong with UW but I don't understand why they think it'd be worth that price if they have other good or better alternatives for a lower price. Does you second S want to go there largely because his bro does and it's familiar (and comfortable) for him? If so, he needs to open his eyes and mind to other possibilities, maybe even some out of the box ones.</p>
<p>One problem is that many kids at that age don't really comprehend the financial aspect - they're more in the 'I want' mode. Even showing them some of 'mini's' numbers might not help that aspect but it's worth reviewing for the kid because I think a lot of them view this as just funny money at this point and then get slammed after graduation when the reality hits. But this is why parents who either pay the bill or cosign (which means they might end up paying regardless) have veto power. The kid might get disappointed but financial compromises are what most of us have to make in life. Sometimes it helps to put it in a context they might be able to relate to. For example, if he were given a hypothetical choice between going to UW ($100K OOS) vs. going to a less expensive in-state or merit-aided private but also with it getting a new Mustang/WRX/Evo, plus a new plasma TV, plus a new video game system, etc., which would he choose? If he thinks he'd choose the latter then why's he so strong on UW in the first place?</p>
<p>Have you researched other colleges, including privates, that might be appealing to your S? Depending on where he ends up with stats he might get a much better deal at another college that might be just as or more appealing to him than UW. </p>
<p>Finally, is there any way S2 could get some reduced tuition rate either through a merit grant, due to his sibling already attending, or otherwise?</p>