<p>In general, white girls are pretty nice about black girl/white guy pairings when the white guy in question isn't of any interest to them. The anger comes out more when the "big man on campus" types (Ex: hot frat boys, football players, rich prepsters, etc) date black women who are equally as attractive as they are. I guess they are not used to us being any kind of competition. I'm not drop dead gorgeous, but I can hold a torch to the aesthetic appeal that is usually reserved for white women.</p>
<p>Whether or not we want to admit it, the beauty of white women has always been put on a peadastal as something that the women of the other races have to "play catch-up" to. I think the white girls at my school are just really surprised when they see me hanging on the arm of a white guy that is desired by them. It's kind of like we're all running in a race for a prize, but I'm using a slightly different method/technique than them that is still just as effective.</p>
<p>Wow it is the same way for black guy/white girl, usually white guys don't care when the girl is unattractive but when she is hot (think Heidi Klum) then they are mad, but I think it is for a different reason that the one from white girls. Black males systematically were made subjugated so when an attractive white girl wants a black man it is a literal slap in the face to the white male ego. Perhaps the same is true for white girls.
I never noticed that white girls ever cared, they always seemed aloof to the whole thing. But maybe that is because girls act in an antagonist way to each other that guys don't really know about. Like someone had to tell me that girls were mean, I would have never known, especially white girls. Every single white girl or white woman I have ever interacted with have always been extremely kind to me. In fact I was told that I was really handsome by an older white lady who said that I had the attractiveness that girls won't notice until they want to get married. Oddly I always get along well with white women. I guess our two experiences are kind of inverted, lol.</p>
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"Whether or not we want to admit it, the beauty of white women has always been put on a peadastal as something that the women of the other races have to "play catch-up" to"
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<p>I don't know if that is neccesarily true, but IMHO white girls as an aggregate are tied as the most attractive race with middle eastern and indian girls. Then asians then blacks and then hispanics. In my own ranking of group attractiveness, but there are certainly individuals who stand out exceptionally i.e. alicia keys.
But in my personal life girls who are not black seem to be nicer, not to offend anyone, but some of the rudest people I have ever met have been black girls. So I would consider the vast majority of black girls to be un-dateable (I am sure that is not a word, lol).</p>
<p>It's alright. Not all black girls are the same though. I'm so sick of the "Angry Black Woman" stereotype. I couldn't be more mellow if I tried.</p>
<p>As far as personal dating preferences of races go, we all are entitled to our own opinions. I just love sampling all the flavors, ya know? One day maybe you'll meet a black girl who tickles your fancy and doesn't appear threatening. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I'll be able to break my guy's habit of calling me his "Ebony Queen". It's just a little too awkward to hear that come out of someone's mouth on a regular basis. Call me "Hot Chocolate" all you want, but not an "Ebony Queen".</p>
<p>When it comes to dating, you really cannot group people together by race.Girls and guys get upset when you date people they are interested in, regardless of what race or ethnicity they are! It's all about the individual.</p>
<p>Additionally, Dbate, your small sampling of rude and offensive black women is definitely not indicitave of every black woman. Don't date us if you aren't attracted to us. But don't assume that we are all rude, stubborn, loud, offensive, and un-datable just because we are black.</p>
<p>And on a side note, I agree with Sassy on the beauty point. Why do you think so many black women, and women with just plain thick and curly hair are always trying to straighten it?</p>
<p>Sassy6519- I soo agree with you! I get mad but all hell isn't going to break loose. I love my beauty! My family doesn't consider themselves AA so, I just consider myself Haitian-German, even though I look completely Haitian lol. My hair is the only thing from my German side. I think every race, every women, every man, and every person is beautiful, sometimes it takes more time to see it (not always physically beautiful). I look at everything; the whole package. Looks are VERY deceiving. :)</p>
<p>Ah! It's like I've found people who are living my life =)</p>
<p>I live in a 97% white town, but I love it. I'm also the "token" black kid, and have spent most of my life around whites/asians. I did spend my middle school years at an "urban" school, but honestly, I felt really constricted. It was like I had to change my manner of dress and speaking just to fit in (although I will say, that I've been laughing so hard for the past couple of years. The same girls who used to tell me that Baby Phat and Rocawear were God's gift to man, now wear the same "white" clothes they made fun of me for wearing, just 3/4 years ago.) I don't know. I hang with anyone, regardless of color, but I found that when comparing my "black school" experience vs my white school one, I've just found that I'm more comfortable in the latter...It's easier to just be me, especially since everyone will just think it's "so cool!" anyway, hahaha.</p>
<p>Anyway, at first, in this new neighborhood, people didn't really know how to act around me. There's a very small AA population, and to a lot of my friends, I'm the only black person I know. They expected me to be loud and obnoxious--that whole stereotype. But they soon realized I'm the total opposite...I'm verrrrrry laidback (like, I rarely ever get mad), nice, and somewhat of a flower child. I'm also pretty smart, which people didn't expect. Oh, and I didn't get mad at their black jokes, haha. Now, they barely even register me as black, though I still try to make them see that it's not that I'm not "really black", but that there's no one type of black. If that makes sense?</p>
<p>I agree with you sugarpop. I think it makes perfect sense that there is "no one type of black". I am also very chill and never get mad, I'm actually pretty bubbly. I think that being black is something that is unique to each AA, and not something that can be defined in a broad generalization, i.e. loud, and always mad, as Sassy6519 put it, the "Angry Black Woman". Being black doesn't define us socially or academically.</p>
<p>One thing I must add is, being a successful black male means that the spotlight is always on you. It's like this double standard, where the current black generation will stop at nothing to see you fail, but then the older black generation wants you to "stay black" and not "sell out". It's like a catch-22, in that one says any form of success is a form of whiteness, and the other says be successful and still stick with us.</p>
<p>My experiences may not reflect everyone, but I feel this is why many young black males don't succeed in school, because they don't want that sort of pressure. They just want to be themselves and be happy. Except you have this double-standard placed on you at birth, so why bother trying? </p>
<p>It doesn't matter to me. I am, was, and always will be myself. Being African-American is what I am, but not who I am. I've had that pressure to identify with the culture my entire life, but it's just not **who **I am.</p>
<p>But thankfully, I'm hoping that in future generations black culture diversifies. It seems as if up until the past few years, black culture has been this very one-dimensional idea, a very overlying prevalent culture with few subcultures contained within. But now, it's pretty interesting to see kids taking to like punk-rock culture and adapting it as their own.</p>
<p>":Ah! It's like I've found people who are living my life =)"</p>
<p>"^^^I don't really understand what you are saying. "</p>
<p>I'm saying some schools are currently re-evaluating the usefulness of these minority events, and some feel they perpetuate "self-segregation". I think there may be something to be said for those opinions, but I think the "ah!" moment described, is something all of you should experience. I think these invitationals are a similar experience.</p>
<p>I definitely agree with Shrinkrap with this one... I went to an invitational thing in the fall, and it was mind boggling. I loved every minute of it.</p>
<p>I have lived in some major cities liek Boston, DC( well like 15minutes away, I lived in MAryland) and Atlanta. Every experience has kinda been the same until i moved to Maryland. I was in a majority black school and to them i was the smartest kid they've ever known. I was also the "white" one because how they put it to me, "you don't sound white, you just sound really proper". I hated it there. I couldnt be myself and i had zero friends because the black kids said i thought i was better than them which wasnt the case at all. Before then i lived in boston with a whole race of people. I had friends of all shades and cultures and backgrounds. Then i moved to a small town in the south. OMG CULTURE SHOCK!! lol. Its just not for me. I am the only black in my sophomore class at school who is in all honors and top 10 in my class. Before anywhere I lived people asked me for help, but now no asks me because im black. ALL the time during school if I say an answer they say its wrong and double check everything I do. has anyone else experienced that before?</p>
<p>ambaturkey11, I live in the south, and I used to get the "whoa, you're a smart black kid' looks and remarks, but now I don't get them, because my classmates are used to it, and they appreciate me. I also get the comment that I talk proper, but I dont care. lol I like the way I speak, and it was how I was brought up to talk. lol I cant change it. I am not the only black in my AP and honors classes, there is one more AA girl, who is very sweet. But I am the only AA in the gifted program in my grade. It is just something I have gotten used to. The underclassman have more diversity within their honors and gifted classes, so there are more AAs and other minorities. :)</p>
<p>I'm in the same boat as all of you guys. I'm biracial, and it's funny, there's always this awkward moment after I've known someone for a while where they ask, "sooo... what <em>are</em> you, exactly?" They're so afraid they're going to offend me or something. Although, that used to happen more when I wore my hair straight; I have since accepted my natural curls. :)</p>
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"ALL the time during school if I say an answer they say its wrong and double check everything I do. has anyone else experienced that before? "
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<p>This used to happen alot with the asians in the honors classes until they realized that I was smarter than they were. It makes me want to chuckle at how everyone on here has such similar experiences, and at the same time it is a little said that a smart black person is such a "rarity" that it draws some of these responses.</p>