Im a senior in high school and Im shy but I can hold up a conversation, I just have trouble making actual friends instead of just acquaintances. I struggle with starting a conversation but am fine when someone comes up to me. A lot of people say I seem chill and cool but thats it, usually the conversation ends and we go and do our own thing. The thing is Im a mix of a lot of different cliques in high school and so It gets boring staying with one clique (which most people at my school do). Also no one seems like they really want to make friends (even freshman year was like this). One thing I can say though is I dont step out of my comfort zone which I want to change in college. Do most introverts end up making friends? (I know you cant really answer this because you cant generalize everyone, but for those of you who are Introverts how was your experience?)
You’ll need to, like you say, step out of your comfort zone. I have made three or four friends but not close ones. Can’t just wait for people to come to you, because the odds are low that you’ll be randomly noticed by the people you like in a school with 40k+ other students. You have to show them you’re interested in getting to know them. Join clubs and stuff too.
It’s a school of 40,000 kids, so while there is always something to do and something going on, it is all on the student to take the initiative to participate. Making friend as a freshmen is easier since lots of freshman don’t know anyone either. I think that the fact that there are so many students means that if you don’t find close friends right away (which most people don’t) there are thousands of other kids to meet! Meeting new people and making friends is work, but just like anything else the farther you step outside your comfort zone the more you learn and the easier it is the more you do it. Good Luck. I’m sure you can find your place at PSU.
Yes, I agree with what JJHS2014 mentioned: it depends on how involved you are. I just finished my freshman year, and since I’ve been pretty involved, I’ve met quite a lot of people. I am an introvert as well. My friend, on the other hand, was not involved in anything, and had only spend time in the library or at his dorm, so therefore he did not meet too many people during his freshman year. However, I have to admit that meeting people in college is not difficult, but keeping those relationships is more difficult, and this is true regardless of which college you’ll end up at. Just remember that any kind of relationship takes time.
You will be in a dorm with the majority of extroverts. If you have any reservation i would consider something smaller. I had a few friends who never got used to the size and transferred. My daughter is quite shy and has a hard time going out of her comfort zone. She went to Shenandoah University which is quite small and did great. Now my son only wants huge. He has no trouble walking up to a stranger and making friends. Now having said all of this I am sure there are programs in place today to help you that I didnt have in the 80"s. A lot more programs to help you get involved with something where you can make friends. Penn State is one of those places that you either are crazy about and that’s the only place to go or not.
I have social anxiety disorder and just finished my freshman year at Penn State. People constantly saying you need to get out of your “comfort zone” is really hard when for me I’m NEVER comfortable around others and putting myself out there results in a lot of anxiety and self-loathing. That being said, it IS important to find things to get involved in, but only do what you feel most comfortable doing. Try living in an SLO your first year; that means you would be on a floor with people with similar interests/backgrounds and it would be easier to connect with people. If there are floor events go to those and see if you can connect with people; if you feel too uncomfortable, leave (you’re an adult and it’s your life). Finding some clubs or other extracurriculars to get involved in helps too. I had joined three clubs at the start of the year but because of anxiety and depression I only ended up still going to one by the end of the year, but that’s the club where I’ve made basically all my friends and the club I’m going to be on the exec board for next year. Definitely try to go to events that your club has; I regretted not going to events sooner in the year but I went on a week-long trip with them and that really helped me to make friends. You could also try connecting to people in class or at work, but at least for me those relationships only existed in that context.
A few more things about my experience: I lived in Discover House which is an SLO for undecided first year students (tbh I didn’t really like it and didn’t make any long lasting friends but next year I’m living in an SLO that’s better suited for my interests). I never went to the football games and I didn’t go out to parties on the weekends, and it sometimes felt like I was the only person at Penn State that wasn’t involved in that part of PSU culture, but it’s a big campus and a lot of people aren’t interested in those kinds of things, and even though a lot of my friends are the type to party or get super drunk on the weekends they still respected that I didn’t want to do that and didn’t try to pressure me to do things I was uncomfortable with. Even though I had met people I still felt really lonely during the fall because I wasn’t really sure HOW one makes friends, but going to more club events in the spring semester helped me and now I feel like I have a group of people I can talk and hang out with next year.
Sorry this is so long lol. You’re probably going to have a better time than I did, especially since you have the initiative to get out there, which definitely helps. Definitely check out the involvement fair the first week to find clubs you’d be interested in doing and try to let yourself be open for conversations with others, and definitely give yourself some time alone if that’s what you need. Good luck!
So you did make friends right? If so, Im happy for you man. ( I have minor Social Anxiety, but only during “first time” meetings and stuff).
Yes I did make friends 
it took a bit longer than it did for most and I don’t know how long-lasting those friendships will be but I did make friends, and you will too! First time meetings are really hard (for the club I’m on the exec board I left the first meeting crying because of my social anxiety lmao) but there will be a lot of people experiencing similar fears that you are or have in the past, and you’ll be able to connect with people once you make it past those hurdles.
PSU is big. However, the benefit of it being really big is that there are a thousand small subsets of people with different interests. Introvert here with social anxiety, I was kind enough to pass both of those traits on to my PSU student who is entering her second year. Her advice is this:
No one is looking at you or judging you or anything like that. So put that out of your head and ‘just do you’.
Welcome Week can be exhausting for people like us, but make yourself go to every event. Promise yourself that you will go and smile and see what’s up for five minutes. Set a timer in your phone. Most of the time, after five minutes, the ‘flight response’ has waned and it feels fun to stay. And if not, then leave! But look at the schedule and be ready to attend the next event whether it be a hall meeting, a campus walking tour, a trip to the creamery or a movie or whatever. Welcome week is to help you become comfortable with the campus, not to force you into friendships, so get out there and see stuff and don’t feel pressured to make lifelong buddies.
My daughter said it helped her to say in her head ‘I am not the only one who feels awkward or anxious’ if she was in a big group, and invariably she would see someone else who had that same quiet look of panic nearby, and could wander over near them and say ‘these things make me feel so awkward!’. She says the other person would always say ‘OMG me too! Ugh!’ and they would agree to maybe hit the next event together.
I personally would not recommend rushing a fraternity or sorority if you aren’t an extrovert. Just my opinion, I am sure there are introverts in Greek life, but it can be a struggle. (Many of the THON committees are a big energy commitment as well.)
Most important, ATTEND THE INVOLVEMENT FAIR. It runs for a couple days so you can easily stop in a few times to peruse the tables. Sign up for absolutely anything that seems interesting…like to work out? Sign up for fitness clubs. Played tennis in high school? Sign up for club tennis. Like to play board games or read books? There are many clubs that meet in the HUB for that. Like anime, music, Harry Potter, skiing? Clubs for all that and many many more. Then you will be notified via email about info meetings where you can learn more about the club and gauge whether you want to continue. Sign up for five, you may stay with only one or two, but starting out with choices is nice. Oftentimes these clubs become social groups as well. Think the people at the table seem nice, but the not sure about the club? Sign up anyway, you may enjoy trying something that you have no history with!
Go to the football games. Seriously. Every home game. Even if you don’t love football. If you didn’t get season tickets this week, buy individual tickets at the HUB ticket desk or the BJC. You will not regret it.
If you have any trouble adjusting, please reach out to the RA on your hall…they can help in any situation, and are usually good listeners.
Mostly just have fun and enjoy the experience, there’s no place quite like Penn State in the Fall!