What to do during a gap year?

Parents Forum
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<p>Our daughter’s school had granted her request to postpone college for one year.
She worked very hard in high-school, was extremely focused on her studies and was admitted to a great school. We (her parents) agree that a gap year will help her gain some maturity and maybe regain some enthusiasm for school (it’s not easy being a valedictorian 3 years in a row, even in a non-competitive public school:-)).
She had some vague plans about traveling (we have friends and family in several European countries and in Australia) but this week-end she suddenly panicked when she realized that she had a whole year to fill out. I have no intention to tell her what to do:-), but I would like to at least give her a few ideas.
She has several thousand dollars in savings. Although I hope that she saves some of it for college, it also means that she does not have to work the whole time, or that she could enroll in a volunteer program such as AmeriCorps.</p>

<p>What experience have you (or your children) had with gap years before college? What have you/they done? What have you/they wished they had done differently?</p>

<p>Thank you for any help</p>

2

<p>I took a gap year way back in 1969. I guess I was a pioneer. There wasn’t much support for it then, but now, it is, as you know, common.</p>

<p>In hindsight, my biggest piece of advice might be to not be too hands off. Granted, at this age, the push for autonomy is strong, and sometimes we have to be subtle or even tricky in maintaining influence. But I wish that my mother had given me a little more guidance, even though I might have seemed to resist it at the time.</p>

<p>I would also recommend against your daughter doing too many things for short periods of time. I did that, because I was so excited about having freedom to do things other than school, and I think I burned out quicker than I would have in college! (I worked in Appalachia, then traveled, then lived on a farm, then worked in a fish factory- it was the '60’s). It was a patchwork without any continuity or depth.</p>

<p>I am curious: when did your daughter decide to do a gap year? Did she say she was tired of school and schoolwork? Does she feel less motivated than she would like, now that she is “in” a good school? In a positive direction, are there things she feels driven to do, or is the gap year mainly, in her mind, to take a break from academics? Is this gap year a result of burnout?</p>

<p>I think that at 18, I realized that my academic motivation (and I was also a top student) had too much to do with habit, and with external goals, rather than internal motivation. I wanted the year to rediscover what really excited me, and to get away from always doing what I was “supposed” to do. Again, looking back, I wish I had just gone to school. I had just as good a chance at making those changes while in school, and I found it hard to return to the academic path later on, after the gap year.</p>

<p>Where is she going to live? Does she have friends around? Isolation was a big problem for me, during that year, and so involvement in something that brings friends/peers can be important.</p>

<p>Nowadays it is easier, and many students are taking a year off before attending college. But, at 18 a year is a lot longer than it is for us parents, and a lot of changes can happen. I would be very involved in helping her plan, if she will let you…it is very overwhelming to fill a year at her age.</p>

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<p>I attended [INSTITUT</a> DE TOURAINE](<a href=“http://www.institutdetouraine.com/index.php?LANG=ANG]INSTITUT”>Apprendre le français en France | Cours de français en France | Institut de Touraine). Great experience, I spent the last part of the year auditing courses at the local university. I lived with a French family. My nephew was going to do this: [WWOOF</a> - World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms](<a href=“http://www.wwoof.org/]WWOOF”>http://www.wwoof.org/) for the second half of his senior year (he graduated in January), but had to have knee surgery instead.</p>

<p>I think learning a foreign language before college is enormously helpful and makes more sense than losing part or all of your junior year.</p>

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<p>Thank you compmom, very interesting advice. Particularly about the risk of isolation. I think that is what she is starting to realize, which prompted the crisis during the week-end.</p>

<p><<i am=“” curious:=“” when=“” did=“” your=“” daughter=“” decide=“” to=“” do=“” a=“” gap=“” year?=“”>>
There was some burnout. But she has been rather shy and reserved, I get the impression that she wanted to get out of her comfort zone and explore what she could do. Of course, this was a great idea, but she will need some pointers to make it work in a concrete way.</i></p><i am=“” curious:=“” when=“” did=“” your=“” daughter=“” decide=“” to=“” do=“” a=“” gap=“” year?=“”>
</i>

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<p>Thank you Mathmom, the WWOOF web site was very interesting and had some great links. You are right about languages, she is seriously thinking about spending most of that year outside of the US.<br>
However, she has definitely ruled out any situation where she would have to attend school, or be an au-pair, since those are 2 things she has already experienced;-)</p>

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<p>Just want to add that I did not intend to sound negative, especially when I said that I might have been better off just going to school. If I really sit down and travel back in time, I know that is not true!</p>

<p>Your daughter sounds like an interesting person, and I think it is wonderfully brave of her to try to “get out of her comfort zone.” I think that is what I was trying to describe, too.</p>

<p>She is lucky to have you, too. Coming on here for advice is a great idea, and I hope you get some great ideas here on CC.</p>

<p>There are gap year websites online. I don’t remember what they are called, but maybe someone here does. In my town, several kids have gone to Costa Rica to work in an orphanage. I also know kids who have taken the train to a job every day, doing something more mundane, and then they pursue art or music or theater after work. There seem to be infinite possibilities these days, which is great- but also a big problem!</p>

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<p>In addition to all the good new ideas on this thread, try running a Search here on CC for prior threads. Click the “Search” button top-center on this page. Type in the keywords: gap year</p>

<p>Also read parents’ pointers about running a search:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/741736-how-do-i-find-gap-year-threads.html?highlight=gap+year[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/741736-how-do-i-find-gap-year-threads.html?highlight=gap+year&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>She might enjoy traveling to see your family and friends for a few months and then staying in one of the countries as an au pair: <a href=“http://www.planetaupair.com/aupaireng.htm[/url]”>http://www.planetaupair.com/aupaireng.htm&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>There’s always gapyear.com for ideas: <a href=“http://www.gapyear.com/[/url]”>http://www.gapyear.com/&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>I’m sure she wants a break now, but school might not look so bad by January. I’ve found that my experience both in France and also studying German at a Goethe Institute are very different from high school or college. You are only studying one thing, there is minimal homework, a good portion of the fellow students are there to have a good time (another portion are being paid by their companies), and classes are often only half the day. Good luck to her whatever she ends up doing.</p>

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<p>I agree with mathmom.
I believe that a student on gap year needs some kind of structure, whether it is provided by a set of courses, a part-time job, a volunteer project, or an internship. Doing nothing or constant traveling gets boring quickly and at the same time erodes the discipline that was provided by the high school and that will be expected again in college. The student could create her own project depending on her interests. I could see exploring the world of French bakeries or fashion, or French church architecture, etc… The important thing is to have a goal and a project and carry it out.</p>

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<p>marite, LOL
“exploring the world of French bakeries” as a gap year project.
Genius, sheer genius!
:)</p>

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<p>Did the college that accepted her give her blanket pre-approval to do anything on a gap year without getting back to them first, or must she submit a project description to them in advance for approval ? </p>

<p>When you filed their forms by deadline, was there any indication of a review process to approve her gap year plan? Be careful of that, because if they have such, she needs that approval so they’ll hold her spot for next year.</p>

<p>Not to scare you, just a caution word. The school itself might have some ideas if it’s okay to just travel, or if they need to see some product, coursework, or her own outline of goals for the year.</p>

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<p>My son is completing his gap year. His primary task for the year was to complete a novel that he and a co-author are writing. They have made great progress, but are not yet done. He had not applied to college so he used part of the fall for taking SATs and applying, which took much more time than expected. He had surgery in January, and post-recovery, has been writing, with occasional traveling – to a music festival, to Quebec, hiking in the White Mountains. He was supposed to spend a month traveling in Europe but his friends flaked out on him. [He’s traveled a lot with us and has done things like Outward Bound, so it isn’t as big an issue as it might have been]. </p>

<p>He was not at all interested in gap year programs like Where There Be Dragons (<a href=“http://www.wheretherebedragons.com%5B/url%5D”>www.wheretherebedragons.com</a>). He just felt that these would be organized baby-sitting. Not clear that he was right. We had friends whose kids have loved these programs. A friend’s son spent a year in Israel in an organized program, which included working on a farm, some study, touring in Israel and Europe, and doing the basic training for the Israel Defense Force (let me tell you that this kid is in really good shape at this point). He really enjoyed it.</p>

<p>Getting a job in another country could be a great experience. Most of the kids who work on the ski hills in the Banff area are from Australia and New Zealand. They do it before heading off to university. How about trying the same in NZ? If jobs are hard to find (likely these days), how about a pseudo-job organized by one of the gazillion gap-year companies? Or teaching English in a school someplace?</p>

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<p>Katliamom: Glad you like my idea.:slight_smile: The student could get the freshman 15 before freshman year. Though one would hope it would be only 15 lbs and not 15 kgs. Shudder…<br>
I met a prof at some dinner party who was writing a book about chocolate in France. All I could remember from my childhood was very ordinary milk chocolate (Poulain). But she was exploring the marketing of dark chocolate as a luxury item and had accumulated tons of notes as well as eaten a lot of chocolate. There are people who know how to have fun…</p>

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<p>Does your daughter have a favorite foreign language that she wants to either improve or pick up? It would be great to spend at least a few months on that. Why don’t you tell her to plan a 3 or 4 month program with a focus on a language, choose one, and then fit trips visiting family and friends before or after it.</p>

<p>Or is she artistic and didn’t have time to take many art classes in h.s.? How about finding a program where she can learn glassblowing or some other unusual art? Again, find a 3 or 4 month program that is especially appealing and then work other things around it.</p>

<p>I have heard that during a gap year you can take community college classes as a non-degree student, saying you are enrolling in the classes for personal enrichment. Maybe a community college near her favorite out-of-state aunt’s house has a program she would enjoy taking a few classes in. Think outside the box - a vocational program like motorcycle repair? or something like web design? Again, maybe she could find something structured to do for a few months and then work other things around it.</p>

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<p>Also, my friend’s daughter has had great success with WWOOF travelling.</p>

<p>And the coolest GAP year program I have ever read about was this one:
<a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/525195-gap-year-ghana-2-945-a.html?highlight=volunteer[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/525195-gap-year-ghana-2-945-a.html?highlight=volunteer&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>Or, for a shorter program, three months in Ghana for $1595
<a href=“http://www.workingabroad.org/volunteer-africa-ghana.html[/url]”>http://www.workingabroad.org/volunteer-africa-ghana.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>Is she a skier? My S had a friend who took a gap year and worked the ski season as an employee at the Jackson Hole Resort. Needless to say if she has skiing friends, she will have people who come and visit. It allowed this student to start learning real responsibility (get to work on time w/o parents around), bugeting, etc. </p>

<p>Working somewhere for the Winter Season also breaks the year up. The friend of my S said that it was weird that while all his friends were having their new “college experiences” and were really only into that, he was working. He said that he was glad to have been off doing something interesting when all the college freshmen swarmed back home at Winter Break.</p>

<p>This student also did a 6 week stint of traveling in Europe.</p>

18

<p>I could not possibly thank all of you!!
Since we did not know anybody else who had done a gap year, we were a bit at sea, but it is obvious that there are lots of possibilities for her. I am also relieved to see that it is not too late to apply to many programs or to think about taking a class if she chose to. Her school does not seem to care, just asking that she reconfirms her intentions next February and not enroll in another college in the meantime.</p>

<p>What I am seeing here is the need for a definite structure, whatever she chooses to do. That is interesting because that had been my first instinct, but I was trying stay back;-). Also the need to make sure that she is within a group of people. I like the warning about keeping up with her friends in terms of new experiences or accomplishements.</p>

<p>Thank you CC!</p>

19

<p>Gap years that are positive and fulfilling are usually the result of pursuing a passion - language, sports, volunteer, travel, writing a screen play, theater group…joining some type of organization with a common cause, theme, passion results in friendships and bonding, exploration, freedom and a refreshing time to regenerate academically for next fall. Hence, without some type of a plan, passion or group, one can tend to take on a nomad type of gap year that can do more harm than help.</p>

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<p>I haven’t got much to add besides what has already been said, but I’m fresh out of my gap year and I thought I’d just share a little of what I’ve done.</p>

<p>For the first few months, I took it really easy just to unwind and jotted down things that I might be interested in pursuing during my year off. Anything that seemed fun or interesting, I’d just write down to consider later. I found it helped to hype up the gap year by just having an easy month and just seeing a list of fun things that you <em>can</em> do start to pile up.</p>

<p>After this first month though, I started to look into my list and see which of them were viable (Too expensive? Not available? Not enough time?) More than half the list got scrapped, but I really found out about what I was interested in (Funny how I never really noticed that before).</p>

<p>Anyway, I’m not quite sure how things are like over in the US, so my experiences would probably be wildly different. In any case, a few things that I did (and would recommend if your child is interested in them)</p>

<ul>
<li><p>Picking up a new sport. With the whole high school life, sometimes it’s hard to pick up a new sport that you’re interested in; instead just focusing on what that you already know. Same goes for spending more time on sports that you already find fun but don’t have time to play much (Golf! I have to say, having lots of time to practice makes your ball fly a LOT straighter)</p></li>
<li><p>Tutoring. I had a full time job for 6 months (I worked as a croupier at a casino [Legal age is 18 in Australia, but I think it’s 21 in the US? I’m not entirely sure on this]) but I found that a full time job made it hard for me to focus on what I <em>wanted</em> to achieve. It was a really good experience into working life and for saving money, but not something I’d focus my entire gap year on unless I desperately needed the money.</p></li>
</ul>

<p>That said, I found tutoring to be an exceptionally good way to add a little extra pocket money to fund gap year plans. Not only that, but it helps to keep you familiar with academics while you’re on your year off so you don’t become entirely rusty. In fact, I found tutoring helped me to refresh on stuff that I’ve already forgotten. To find jobs, I got my schools help in giving out my name (school might be willing to help since your daughter was valedictorian) and by going to family friends that need help. Those friends often help to spread your name if you their kid shows some improvement.</p>

<ul>
<li><p>Picking up something unrelated to your major. I knew that whether I decided to stay in Australia or go to the US, I’d probably not be doing anything related to commerce/finance. That said, I started to self-study accounting. I have to admit, that was a little tedious since I was in a “gap year mood” but I eventually got to it. The way I see it, when I graduate, I’d not only have an extra qualification, but I’d be a much more well-rounded person too. </p></li>
<li><p>Learning a new language/Travel. This was, probably, a highlight of my gap year. I took full-time employment mostly to fund my traveling. I studied two different languages, then once I got some level of proficiency, I packed up and went to that country for two weeks or so. Not only did that help me to better learn the language, but I got to travel too! Definitely a worthwhile experience. I found a really good way to study this was to get an audio-learning aid. Something like Pimsleur that I could throw into my iPod, and play while I was driving around - whether to the golf course, sending my siblings to school etc. Rather than listening to the radio, I’d just pop that on instead.</p></li>
<li><p>Writing a book. Not something everyone would be interested in, and I probably won’t get round to finishing it till after college, but I found it a very useful way for “spending” all that creativity that I have now that I’m not studying the whole time.</p></li>
</ul>

<p>All that said, however, I think the most important thing for a gap year is just to really evaluate <em>what</em> you want out of college, and refresh yourself – because that year will go by really really quick. I’m sure that something good will come out of it. Best of luck to your daughter, and if you have any questions, feel free to message me!</p>

<p>(I apologise for the lack of organisation in this post, but it’s rather late. Oops.)</p>

<p>EDIT: With regards to financing a gap year, I found that I didn’t need much at all by living at home (my parents didn’t ask me to pay them anything - thank you mum/dad!). My other expenses, I managed to get by with tutoring, and even had some to spare. That said, I’m not a big spender, but I found tutoring one kid a week was enough. I had an american lady approach me and ask for SAT tuition, I’m not sure if that’s big in the US or not, but that might be viable as well. </p>

<p>My only big expenses were traveling, but that was definitely money well spent.</p>