<p>Ok aplogies for starting a thread in my very first post but I have found this site to be a facinating place almost addictive. So spent a lot of time here lurking. Anyway to my question. My son is playing U11 soccer and is doing well (dominates his U11 Div 1 team). He is passionate about the sport and we are hopefull he is able to pursue his sport along with keeping up on his grades. However what happens next ? Do we as parents continue to be supportive and let things work out on thier own natural pace or do we do anything different. After all my S could change his intrests as he grows older , god forbid .. get hurt etc.. How have other parents handled this phase and when do you as parents know for sure your child is destined to play soccer at a competitive level?
Thanks for any response on this..</p>
<p>I am a few years ahead of you in soccer, my daughter is 15 and has been playing club soccer since U9. Next month she will be attending her first college showcase, I still cannot believe we are at this point already, it seems like she was just 5 and starting AYSO (they actually let her play at 4 1/2).</p>
<p>While she still has a few years to go until college, she has had many ups and downs and I am sure she will have many more!! Main advise, do not pressure your child, let them take it at their own pace, if you do not they will burn out. Find a good development coach, and a team with a good group of players (and parents), who will support each other. I would suggest private training and definitely high level camps, so he can really see where he is at. I do not know where you are, but we are in California where for every good kid, there is a great kid!! </p>
<p>Oh, I forgot, the downs, being released from a team, injuries…my daughter wanting to quit on numerous occasions, devistation after losses or bad play, hours of driving to places we never would want to go to again, and sitting on fields for day on end…the ups…love of the beautiful game, great friends, learning to win and lose (in sports and in life), and FAMILY time that will be cherished for ever…</p>
<p>Goo luck…and see you on the pitch</p>
<p>love the question!</p>
<p>i knew when she was a freshman the first week of practice. the way she said it, when I asked if she could miss practice tomorrow, her response, “NO, I HAVE PRACTICE” …it was all in the tone of voice, serious commitment.</p>
<p>from a non-athlete to an athlete in just 4 days of practice. 4 years later I think she’s missed 3 maybe 4 practices. and they practice 6 days a week, 10 months of the year. </p>
<p>that’s when you know:)</p>
<p>Thanks SockherMom and pacheight.
SM you make some great points about not putting any additonal pressure.
About private training - How does this work? Do you approach a coach in his present team or ask around? Is it worth it? Same goes for Camps - do they help the player?
I think my S is strong minded having seen how he handled his being cut from his first team… He has since improved a lot since then…He is in California as well and boy do we know about the competion. Great players and great competition. As far as my S goes I am thinking the season this year should tell where he is at … I think. The season starts early with Spring /Summer and Fall games. I am hoping that he and we can reach the conclusion of where he is at after that. The commiment is large 3 days a week and with games on the weekend. So burn out might well become an issue…</p>
<p>pacheight- 6 days of week practice is a lot - is this soccer or some other sport. if it is soccer is that the level of commitment at HS ? That is scary with the acads etc that they would need to maitain as well.</p>
<p>The way that you find out is not to worry about college. If S wants to play and loves it, more power to him. Sports are great for kids, and if they make varsity in high school andor go on to play in college, its just gravy.</p>
<p>Volleyball became our life when S2 was in 9th grade (14 years old). That was the year it truly became a family affair. We all looked forward to tournament days when she could play and we could enjoy the social aspects of the day. We knew she was good (good enough) at about that time too. Everything got more serious in the Spring of D2’s sophomore year. That’s when it became important to be at a good club with good coaches. But the social aspect was still most important to D2. </p>
<p>We went about the recruiting process with the hope that she would be recruited but also kept it as secondary to the college admission process. We did not pressure D2 at all; we said that if it works great, it not it wasn’t a big deal.</p>
<p>During the Spring of Junior year it became apparent that she would be recruited - somewhere. All of a sudden it became a choice of which school she would choose and only the volleyball schools seemed in the running. But academics drove the equation. First she choose academics and then the volleyball would be the deciding factor. </p>
<p>So, in retrospect, the recruiting fervor grew over quite a few years. I think we went into it with a good attitude - school first, volleyball for fun, volleyball for leverage in admissions and crossed fingers. </p>
<p>Good luck with your athlete. Enjoy the years!</p>
<p>Check out these forums:</p>
<p>[Forums</a> - Powered by vBulletin](<a href=“http://www.socalsoccer.com/forum/index.php]Forums”>http://www.socalsoccer.com/forum/index.php) </p>
<p>for all your So Cal club soccer questions. Lots of discussions on clubs, coaches, private coaching, camps etc.</p>
<p>it’s an “other sport”</p>
<p>if you want to help your son stay at it and love it get him on the right team/club with the right coaching. The right coach is everything!!!</p>
<p>My d lucked out and landed with a fantastic coach who knows how to make it fun while developing an athletes abilities and character.</p>
<p>It all starts and stops with the coach in my opinion.</p>
<p>grades take a hit with full time competitive sports in high school.</p>
<p>HYPS and the rest know this, they said to d and me, “we know you have a 40 hour a week job called your sport on top of going to school full time”</p>
<p>although you still need to have a 3.0 or better to get a lot of recruiting opportunity. as well as a good SAT, I believe they put a lot of weight on the SAT because it’s the most objective measurement they can get.</p>
<p>I’d say I “knew” I was an ‘athlete’ when I gave up other sports for mine. I think this is the case with many other kids, too. Through 7th grade I played school basketball, league soccer, competitive skiing (which I was probably actually better at than my current sport, but I didn’t like it as much), and had also played some football. Things got more “serious” when those other sports that I was doing more for fun were pushed aside. It’s been worth it, though.</p>
<p>Since the elem school years, our athlete tried many many sports over the years, golf, tennis, swimming, soccer, surfing,hiking, rock climbing, etc etc
owns
cleats
heelies
climbing boots</p>
<p>you get the idea
and our student is always up for trying something new…</p>
<p>Four yrs ago I suggested our student try a cedrtain summer camp for a week…
and there it was…the right fit…and has stuck with that sport for 4 yrs now…</p>
<p>Still enjoys everything else…and really enjoys the sport…
Wouldn’t have guessed it and am glad it was a natural pursuit of interests. If our student says, “i’m done” with this and decides not to pursue it colegiately (NOT likely and yet we never know)…thats ok too.</p>
<p>With boys especially, it’s best not to put too much stock in who’s good at age 11. Sometimes kids dominate in soccer when they’re young because they’ve got size or a little more smarts and physical maturity than their peers at that age. But we’ve seen time and time again that puberty can totally change the pecking order!</p>
<p>In addition to the motivation and commitment criteria above, I think you know you have an athlete when he excels outside the local club or school sphere as well. Where I live, political considerations really affect positioning and playing time on soccer teams, so I’d agree that high level summer camps can give you a better idea of how good your son is when all that stuff is stripped away.</p>
<p>My recruited S switched sports in HS due to politics in a small town. He still ended up being an elite athlete, even with no private training til his sophomore year…</p>
<p>I’m hoping he’'ll try a walk-on for the much beloved baseball, but when you play the same position as the assistant coach’s son, even if he can’t hit his way out of a paper bag, and you bat .575, you’re nowhere in our town…Anyway, he loves his second sport, but the point is, if you are naturally athletic, it doesn’t always take years and a lot of money to be really good…</p>
<p>^ Sad that these things occur, but they most certainly do. Also, even politics aside. sometimes certain patterns become solidified on a team whereby Child X is deemed “the best” and Child Y “not the best” and you simply can’t figure out how that happened since it doesn’t line up with how you perceive reality! It could be the social or leadership ability of the child, for example. We saw this occur on one of D’s soccer teams. It was hilarious because when a new, better trainer was hired, he made the mistake of not thinking Child X was the best. In fact, at one of the first practices, he told her “You could be a good socccer play if…” Gee, and everyone (but us) thought she was a future Olympian! That trainer didn’t last long since clearly he didn’t respect the established hierarchy, but since our D turned out to be the one he deemed the most skilled, it was helpful in assessing her ability. Funny story too: another one of D’s soccer trainers told her she had no endurance. We were shocked since we thought and had been told by other coaches that that was her best asset as a player. We didn’t let it sway us too mcuh, and when D left soccer ultimately for running, she had enough endurance to be recruited to run distance for a top D1 school! So the morale is, study your child with objectivity and don’t just trust the opinion of one coach. Get multiple assessments, such as by having your son try out for regional teams and things of that nature.</p>
<p>There are several different dimensions I think are critical to being a serious athlete - beyond the obvious physical talent, in many sports you have to have the size and build that puts you in contention and almost always you have to have real passion and drive in order to make the sacrifices necessary to compete at a high level. I think most of those components are hard to predict at the U11 stage - they don’t always develop in a linear, continuous fashion. Some kids who are stars at an early age end up being overshadowed by later bloomers. Our S was one of those later bloomers - we really didn’t know he was D1 material until his junior year in hs. However, he always had that focus - not always on the sport he ended up being recruited for, but always really driven about whatever his focus was at the moment. To the OP - at this point, I’d just provide him with opportunities and see where the road takes you - pretty hard to predict very far down the road at this point. Good luck!</p>
<p>I knew I had an athlete in my eighth month of pregnancy when I would see a long leg kicking out my tummy, threatening to find an exit.</p>
<p>Seriously, heed the advice above regarding early/late bloomers. So many of the early bloomers fade either by burnout, being replaced by late-growing more athletic kids, or a change to another sport or activity. Support your son, but take it season by season. If he has an interest in another sport in junior or senior high school, encourage trying it. </p>
<p>As in GFG’s post–many a kid has been branded inferior early on, only to race by that “star” later in measurable competitions like running or swimming. We observed a soccer player be labeled slow by his coach, only to win multiple state championships in track shortly afterward. Favoritism, nepotism, all sorts of goggles mar coaches’ perception.</p>
<p>As a senior pole-vaulter in our state was interviewed for signing with a top D-I school, her mother was asked what the secret to DD’s success was. Mom answered: "I told her soccer players are a dime a dozen. If you want to shine on the state/regional level, find another sport. " Interesting, and statistically accurate.</p>
<p>Agreed. My S switched to a sport that is individual and uncommon.He saw a chance to shine, and went with it. Now he’s a recruited athlete at Midd. He is thrilled to be able to play a sport in college.</p>
<p>My S would play soccer 7 days a week if he could. He was always top in our AYSO pool and then went to a gold team for soccer. He played Varsity level his freshman year in high school(this year) as a starter. However, he did cross-country to get in better shape for soccer and, guess what, ended up running Varsity his first year, and likes it just as much as soccer. We so not push him in anyway!!! We have let him know that no matter how good he is, his academics are more important. He could get injured at any time and it would all be over. In addition, he has juvenile arthritis and is already having joint damage. He knows that he has to have a back up plan. </p>
<p>We have told him that we will support his sports in any way we can, but that the day it becomes work and not fun, he should look at other activities! We all know what the chances of ever making it in college, let alone professionally are. We just keep him grounded and we will see where it all goes.</p>
<p>my D had never ever done anything remotely athletic prior to turning 13, we were not exactly a soccer and swimming type family…then 4 days in September changed her life, after four years of watching her get more and more committed and becoming one of the best in the country I can now say that those 4 days in September were profound and life changing.</p>
<p>and as I said in another post, the single biggest influence on her was the coach!</p>
<p>Here is an interesting article. Hope the link works.
<a href=“http://www.montrosemarlins.org/Documents/AthleticScholarships.pdf[/url]”>www.montrosemarlins.org/Documents/AthleticScholarships.pdf</a>
This was quoted in our local soccer organization’s newsletter, so I googled it to find the entire article.</p>