<p>Great thread- I am not alone! Every year gets easier- freshman year I bought all sorts of stuff, put it all in the dining room (who entertains formally in summer?), mainly on the table. H and son are not shoppers. I had son check on things. I loaded the suv- that's why everything fit in/on it (H and son, sigh). He was responsible for his bedroom and bathroom items he was using. Morning of move in day (not early)- he's doing- or was I- laundry. Noon- which clothes do I bring- my response, all of them (meaning, duh, all the ones you wear, as opposed to a short summer camp's worth). Finally loaded up, did most of it so we could leave and get back sometime the same day - good thing I did a final walk through- and lunch on the way, one of the last ones to arrive late afternoon. It pays to buy stuff you think they will take- or else you discover you are missing things after they've moved. A "what is yours is mine and what is mine is mine, no reason to tell you I took it" logic. Also, aside from not knowing what to take I think freshmen somehow are in denial that they are leaving home, you aren't leaving if you haven't packed...</p>
<p>Sophomore year- less to take- left unused/unneeded items home, son more able/willing to oversee things. Packing started late morning, again. Easier because I had put bedding and other dorm only stuff away (got tired of waiting for him to unload the dining room that spring) so it was clean and ready to go. Of course H and I never unpack, our job is to unload the suv and depart. This spring H was able to go for the move back home- I stayed with the car but went in at the end- his pillows were in the hall, they were going to abandon a perfectly good under the bed plastic box...</p>
<p>This year- apartment! I made lists of items he can take from home to supplement those there, supplies used lists, food lists... He will decide what to take- last week I put stuff from cupboards on the dining room table along with any usable dorm stuff (anyone want some XL twin sheets?) for him to "pick and choose" from- a lot easier than expecting him to do the treasure hunt. I have also put supplies there from my stocks. I finally treated myself to a good set of nonstick cookware last month (in anticipation of no metal objects ever touching them) so old pots and pans are among the stuff- I had reminded him that everyone in the apt doesn't have to duplicate everything, today he was measuring the volumes of pots (I told him the size is usually on the bottom- he has been in a "I know everything, you know nothing" mode this summer...). We plan to have him do shopping in the college town, but when there's a sale- and why should we have to spend more because he waits to buy? The stuff he doesn't choose to take will either go back on my cupboard shelves, get set aside for a future apt or go to Goodwill (trying to unload the nest before moving in the not too distant future- only a few more years at most). We live close enough that we figure a second trip a week or so later will move everything from home.</p>
<p>On a good note, he has had H order some textbooks online that are cheaper than the college town bookstores. Still don't know if he needs full or twin bedding- ie, how he and roommate are going to do things (and don't ask, you won't get an answer). When I clean house next week he will be involved to learn what needs to be done in a kitchen and bathroom (and his bathroom will be cleaned for the first time since he moved home). He has even mentioned vacuuming his bedroom floor- something that can't be done until he can see it.</p>
<p>I bought a small plastic covered notebook in which I have written family ethnic recipes, some hints and food/supplies brands I use. I also gave him a nice basic cookbook. He may never cook much, but years later he will have that favorite food recipe, now was as good a time as any to do that task. This year he is truly leaving the nest, he will have a place to stay vacations and next summer. Have threatened him with the "if you don't clean out your closet I get to" warning (and I do intend to get rid of HS class notes and college catalogs- 3 bags of those- untouched since senior year). I, too, have had the packing style, personality clash- I do the very thorough getting ready to satisfy my needs and he does the last minute packing to suit him.</p>