<p>I've already written my common app short activity essay, but I feel like I should write about something that would stand out more.</p>
<p>I wrote about a tennis match, where I was losing and then I ended up coming back. I feel like it shows my determination, but I don't know if it would stand out.</p>
<p>Should I change the topic to:</p>
<p>1) my job at a retirement home in the activites department, working with the residents</p>
<p>2) founding the green club at my high school</p>
<p>3) hating track and field, but doing it anyway because I didn't want to quit</p>
<p>4) stick with my tennis essay that I already wrote</p>
<p>To be perfectly honest, none of the activities listed has a “wow” factor as is. Your CommonApp essay should be the most generic one anyway. But, I would really caution against themes along the lines of determination, problem-solving, confidence, independence, etc. These are mere skills and qualities that most, if not all, applicants are going to boast about in their essays/interviews. Try to showcase your values, your core character. That is what will make your essay stand out.</p>
<p>@cacciato that’s an interesting idea! i probably should have done that. i think i’m gonna rewrite my activity essay because i feel like sports in general are too commonly used.</p>
<p>i think i’m gonna write about my internship teaching english to burmese students.</p>
<p>It’s an interesting topic to teach English, but IMO an essay shouldn’t be a compulsion to focus on your top academic/extracurricular activity as much as it should be insight on your character through something sustained over a long period of time or an observation/event/moment which highlights YOU as a person.</p>
<p>The best essays aren’t always the BIGGEST things; sometimes, the better essay is about something tiny that can be expanded into an insightful essay with a deep analogy/suggested implication to it.</p>
<p>I really can’t decide which one would be more significant:</p>
<p>1) On something about how I am the President of my county student government and all the things I’ve help push through the board of ed and state assembly and why i love the job so much, and it’s a really big impressive thing, but I feel like it would be more factual than anything</p>
<p>2) This really kind of not even official babysitting, or actually kind of just hanging out with my 6th grade little cousin once a week after school. It’s not that big of a deal, but I’m proud of it because it gives her something to look forward to during her parents divorce</p>
<p>They could both be good essays, I’m just sure what the colleges would be looking for. They’re both kind of profound in their own ways.</p>
<p>All of your essays seem… boring. Why don’t you dig deeper, like how you had difficulty fitting in at school or any fantasy that you would like to see come true (be as unique as possible). The truth is that anyone of your essay topics could be written by an hundred more students and you want your essay to stand out. And try to put a sense of humor in it, if you have one.</p>
<p>You know you have the long essay to really reflect on something important to you, and you have the activities list to show admissions committees all your extracurriculars and summer jobs. So how can one use the activity essay strategically? Lets start by looking at the prompt. </p>
<p>“Please briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences in the space below or on an attached sheet (150 words or fewer).”</p>
<p>So I see this as an opportunity to explain and expand on something mentioned in the activity sheet. Colleges understand that you choose a topic for your long essay that is not necessarily related to your accomplishments, say like writing about a character in fiction (#4) or an issue of concern (#2) or a person that influenced you (#3). So the activity essay is an extra chance to flesh out and bring to life one of your accomplishments or activities.</p>
<p>So for Damon1570, I think the tennis essay probably isnt your strongest possibility, simply because it focuses too narrowly on one moment in time. Id be much more interested in knowing more about your job at the retirement home, or why and how you founded the green club at your high school. I suspect those are major bullet points on your resume. </p>
<p>Think also about what the essays could show about you. Yes, coming back from a low score in a tennis game shows determination, but doesnt everyone want to win? Your retirement home experience could tell us more about how you work with others and handle responsibility. Your green club experience could tell us about your leadership skills and ability to mobilize people, plus how you act on something that is a passion or a concern.</p>
<p>Damon, learning about your internship teaching English to Burmese students would also be interesting-- I overlooked it because you mentioned it in a separate post.</p>