<p>It could be that easy if they decide to go this route. But as I stated earlier, if he had not paid on this for a while, the amount could be well over the $3200 and be a real pain in the neck to sort out. If he hasn't paid on it and it is was accumulating interest which PLUS loans tend to do, you can be looking at double the amount, without penalty and late fees.</p>
<p>Yeh...financially this isn't a big issue for us, but we didn't get where we are in such a short time by doing stupid things financially, which is how FIL has buried himself more recently. Technically, the loan is now $4400 after compounded interest, and we "gifted" $2100 last year to him that we graciously cancelled because he agreed to take over the loan. Calling that in, we could pay $2300 and be done with it. I would want to pay the lender directly that lump sum. Unfortunately, the FIL's biggest problem isn't the loan itself, it's the $50/month minimum no matter what the balace. He's literally got his budget down to a few dollars, which is what brought this situation this far. Thus...a new dilemma that argues for me just sending him the check with a written agreement that the debt is his and he can do whatever he wants with the money. Ugh...more issues.</p>
<p>jamimom...fortunately, since FIL was in college at the same time as my wife, the loan repayment was deferred and interest simpy acrued. A deferment was also granted while he was in Ch. 13 bankruptcy, which strangely enough based on the loan balance of $4400, I get the impression that they did not acrue interest during that time. Surprising, but true (loan balance should be more like $5500-6000 if it did acrue fully during that time).</p>
<p>I don't think sending FIL the money with an agreement that "the debt is his and he can do whatever he wants with the money" is a good solution. The education debt is tied directly to your wife. Pay it off and he will not be able to whine or hold it over her head any longer. His other money problems are his own to solve.</p>
<p>jameslv1 - If you decide to pay this loan, do NOT give the money to your FIL give it to the loan company.</p>
<p>I am in total agreement with Mominsearch. I have made that mistake of giving money to family members who just spent it without putting it towards what they said they would. Then it was all back in my lap.</p>
<p>rbinaz: Reviewing the documents there is only one point where it has enough information to point to my wife. This loan is not on her credit report and technically I don't think these could ever come to her.</p>
<p>I agree with not giving money the money to him directly. It's difficult since the $50/month bill that is requiring him to dump this back on us after agreeing to take care of it a year ago won't go away unless we pay the entire balance (which we're not going to do). I guess that will just be his problem from there.</p>
<p>james - I'm not sure what you where asking from the posters if you are not going to pay the entire balance anyway. I'm a little confused.</p>
<p>I am, too. It sounds now as if you feel pretty morally superior and are not likely to do anything from a position of family feeling, so where was the real quandary? It's nice for you that you are in a position to be gracious and that you never do stupid things. Lots of us do. If you feel the way you are clearly saying you feel about this man, HE would be better off if you made your position clear right away and let him sort his life out alone.</p>
<p>Sounds to me like OP gave FIL $2100 last year with the agreement that loan would be FIL's after payment of $2100. FIL took OP's money, obviously didn't put it toward repayment of the loan, and now wants to kick back the whole $4400 loan to OP.</p>
<p>Something tells me that "calling in" the $2100 isn't going to get you any money--FIL is tapped out. If OP takes over the loan, then the real repayment will be $6500 (the $2100 already down the drain and the $4400 owed on the loan). What a mess!</p>
<p>Sounds to me like this whole thing has little to do with money. There's a whole lot going on and solving the "who pays" issue won't solve the problems between wife and dad. </p>
<p>Rather than obsess about the repayment, get thee & thy wife to a counselor and figure out what the issues really are.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, it often has to do with money. How to squeeze as much money out of everyone I know, becomes the modus operandum for people when they are running out of money and start getting desperate. Even if you pay every cent of it and keep records, sometimes they claim you still owe them and that you have bamboozeled them on the records and contracts. I have been through this ever so many times.</p>
<p>It's unfortunate that the people you know behave in that way, jamimom. But not everyone does. We don't, nor does anyone we know, and we have been broke ourselves (a terrible sin in this culture, I know). It is possible that this situation could be resolved without bitterness with a forgiving attitude. Maybe that hasn't been in the mix for some time. It sounds as if it may not have been.</p>
<p>Approaching this particular situation with the assumption that one's own father is trying to wring as much money out of one as possible is almost certain to spell death for any problem-solving attempt. I still think there's an opening for reconciliation. People don't live forever.</p>
<p>No, they do not, and people should do the right thing by their parents. But given the info on this thread, this FIL is in trouble financially, and not just from that PLUS loan. There has already been a loan given to him,and the whole tone seems to be of someone looking for money. Clearly if that is not the case, it can be worked out in a nicer way, but in my experience when you are dealing with relatives, it is good to have things in writing and clearly, or you can pay the same money back several times and not have the debt ever paid and the person does not remember the payback. I have had that problem with several issues that I took the trouble to document after being in that situation a few times.</p>
<p>Hi everyone,</p>
<p>I wish the situation was only as simple as mominsearch thinks. I was originally trying to limit the details of other things because I knew it would get messy, and now I've got people creating stories to explain the situation. ;-) Basically, a certain event happened where in lieu of me making $2100 through my job, I helped them out and they saw a real dollar gain of that amount. The mess with the loan first came up after that time, and it was never a conditional agreement. However, in our discussions my FIL saw the value of that $2100 and it helped him decide to take the high road and pay the loan instead of tearing the deteriorating relationship between he and his daughter even further apart. Now, suddenly that is no longer the case and came about because of his own errors in finalizing his divorce. We have already paid for some of his mistakes, and we don't think we should have to pay for this one after he already agreed to take care of it. So we're stuck in a position of calling on that $2100 as partial payment for this loan, if my wife decides we should pay for any of it at all.</p>
<p>So you ask why I'm asking for advice here? Actually, we've already received some of the most valuable advice. The #1 thing is that my wife needs to decide whether to pay anything, or nothing. That is a decision only she can make, and she got a chance to read most of our postings here a couple hours ago and realizes it. Your help has been very valuable. A couple people have sent PMs saying our discussion is really helping them with current situations, and it's no wonder. This issue is so messy without formal agreements.</p>
<p>Thanks!</p>
<p>james - I didn't mean to be rude or think that your problem could be solved simply. I realize that there is so much more to this story than meets the eye. The only reason I asked the question is because so many times the OP posts something then we all comment or give advice only to find out that the OP has left out critical parts of the story, etc. I really wish you and your wife luck with this situation.</p>
<p>James,</p>
<p>As I mentioned earlier, do not assume that this is the end of the bailouts with your FIL. Everything you have posted since my post suggests to me that you have a single fundamental question to address right now with your wife. How much are you two going to be willing to help your FIL...for the rest of his life. Deal with the PLUS loan seperately if you would like, because the loan benefitted your wife directly, or see it as a larger picture. And, NEVER send money to your FIL directly which you can send DIRECTLY to whomever he tells you he will pay with it....I speak from long experience on this. All families are different, but some things really seem the same!!</p>
<p>I am glad I am not in your family....i would sell my guitar and everything else I have to help my kids and I believe they would do the same for me. Don't hold the quarter so close to your eye, you won't see something valuable slipping away. If you can cover it be happy you can and consider it cheaper than the therapy sessions you might wander into. Legal responsibilities are for strangers, friends and family do what we can to help each other out. You asked for an opinion, this was mine and I give it to you free of charge.</p>
<p>Thank you, Mr. B.</p>
<p>Your family and mine are alike. I much prefer it to a pile of cash.</p>
<p>Just thought I'd give everyone a conclusion. After discussing it together, and with a couple family members, we decide to offer my FIL $2100, which was half of the current loan balance. We basically paid the other half through a "gift" in a transaction last year and he agreed that all was good. Contrary to a lot of advice, we decided to go ahead and send him the $2100 directly after providing a signed agreement that this represented payment in full for the loan on our part. Paying that money direct to the lender without dealing with payments wasn't going to accomplish what our FIL needed in his financial situation (monthly payment, not the loan itself, was the problem).</p>
<p>With this mutual agreement, hopefully we can begin pulling things back together and my wife and his relationship has some hope over time.</p>