@Postmodern “I think the idea that there are no kids who would thrive equally at Amherst or Michigan is hard to defend.”
Absolutely. But some kids definitely would thrive better at one or the other. The answer is - depends on the kid.
Surprisingly, some of the wisest kids I knew tried ALL IVY route as after all the research they came to a conclusion that prestige and experience was more important to them then some other things people picked colleges for, e.g. climate, campus,football team, major,proximity to home etc.
Some of them didn’t get in and still doing well, others ended up in Ivy schools and are doing really well. I doubt most kids really know what they want in life, their vision at 17-18 is very narrow and experience very limited so picking a school for prestige is no worse than any other factor.
So how big of a let down is it for the prestige seekers to have to attend a less prestigious school because they were rejected from all of the prestige schools?
When kids mention that they are considering colleges that differ greatly in multiple fit variables, and they explain what draws them to each school, that helps us know that they have (likely) done some research; that they have put some thought into it.
When, on the other hand, a list is presented comprising schools with huge “fit” differences, and the kid or parent gives little to no explanation as to why those are the schools they’re considering, we are presented with little evidence that much careful consideration has gone into the list – as, for instance, when kids list all eight Ivies plus Stanford, Chicago, MIT, etc. That’s when i and others, in an effort to help them form a list of schools according to fit, typically will ask them what they’re looking for.
If they don’t know what they want, well that’s fine… but i think the more they know, the more informed their apps – and ultimate enrollment decision – will be.
Finally, i don’t think anyone on here who offers advice does so with the intent to condescend; rather, i think we’re really just trying to help, and sometimes we have to ask harsh-sounding questions because we are trying to get to the bottom of what the kid wants and what the family can afford.
“prestige and experience was more important” - That can depend on desired program. Many families assume that every program at every Ivy is tops, but I don’t think that’s true.
“I doubt most kids really know what they want in life, their vision at 17-18 is very narrow…”
That’s a fine sentiment for a parent. That’s not how tippy top adcoms pick. Have you got any sense of the fierce competition and what advances a kid? What the expectations are?
“…and experience very limited so picking a school for prestige is no worse than any other factor.” Again, if that’s all you can put in front of an adcom, fuggedaboutit.
But the point here wasn’t the flaws we lovingly accept at home. It’s about diversity in kids’ choices and I agree, that happens, sometimes with plenty of good reasons, many of them cited here.
On the other hand, what difference does it make? If a student gets a CS degree from a lower ranked Harvard program rather other MIT, I don’t think he/she has fewer opportunities career wise.
Unless you’re tossing darts at a map, you must have some some set of factors driving your college choices. Net cost and distance from home seem to be the most significant ones for most families (along with the availability of specific programs, esp. for students interested in pre-professional training for engineering, business, nursing, etc.)
Students who are less constrained by cost or location won’t all be equally sensitive to “fit” issues. If you care above all about academic quality or prestige, that’s your prerogative. However, some of us do believe there isn’t all that much difference in quality across a fairly wide span of the USNWR/Forbes rankings. So it can appear that students who are fixated on just a few top brands (like the Ivies) may be ignoring many good possibilities where they’d be more likely to be admitted, where they may be happier, or where they might get a lower net price.