Why are so many people obsessed about getting into the "best" colleges?

College Search & Selection
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<p>I just finished my sophmore year in high school, freshman year I bought into the hype, skipped a grade in math and science, killed myself for classes, and got basically all A's. This year, I just decided I was sick of it, I'm ending up with mostly B+'s, maybe one or two B's, all honors classes blah blah. I've decided that even though I have all these AP and other classes, I'm simply not going to kill myself over them. I'll study, but I'm not going to go insane and become stressed out. I'll probably practice my instrument some more, shoot some hoops, lift weights instead of staying home and studying, to me it just isn't worth it.</p>

<p>I understand there is a perception that there is a top tier of schools that you just "have" to get into. My question is, why? What is it about those schools that makes them so much better then anything else? Does going to top schools guarentee success? I live in a very affluent town, and while there are some people who went to ivies, their are just as many who didn't and became successes in what they did. My dad went to PACE university and Hofstra Law, and he's done perfectly fine, but my parents want me to go to a top 10 school. They're influenced by rating magazines, I bet ten years ago they wouldn't have even heard of U Chicago or U Wash in St. Louis.</p>

<p>So, aside from my large rant, can anybody explain to me why these colleges are the holy grail for kids?</p>

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<p>A lot of reasons, I guess: they want to impress their peers, their family; they think a top school = top job; they think that the education, the recources, the environment cannot be paralleled. #1 is superficial; #2 is not true; it is what you do while you are at college (did you graduate at the top of your class? intern? develop people skills?) that matters, not the name of the school on your degree #3 is actually legit - classes at a "party school" are on the whole not going to be as invigorating, as challenging, as /meaningful/ as those at, say, Swarthmore; and of course, your peers' attitudes towards academics are going to differ vastly in each scenario; also, Harvard is going to have a greater bearth of recources than, say, a community college.</p>

<p>Why did I want to go to Dartmouth for years? A combination of all of the above. I salivated over the name recognition, the gorgeous campus, and I wanted to spend those four years learning amazing things from amazing people - an intense academic environment really appealed to me. But deep down, did I really want to go to Dartmouth? Actually, no. I wanted to major in journalism, and I didn't want to be in the middle of nowhere. So why was it my "holy grail"? Well, shooting for Dartmouth was like shooting for the stars. It wasn't a case of "I need to get in!", it was "Can I get in?". If I spent HS telling myself I was going to Dartmouth, I would graduate free of regret that I didn't work as hard as I could have. </p>

<p>Now that it's time for me to choose where I /really/ want to go to school, I do regret that I lost my Dartmouth dream sometime during junior year - consequently my GPA (and teacher recs) suffered. But I think holding on to that dream for so long allowed me to go into my Junior year summer with tons of choices. I can get in almost anywhere. A friend of mine graduated with a 3.0 (and she, like you, was very capable of getting As). Now, she's afraid she won't even get into the state Uni, which undoubtably will provide a better education than those schools where the avg GPA of accepted students is closer to hers. I, on the other hand, am thinking about going to California, or maybe even Illinois, or really anywhere. And I can also afford it, because I'm a good candidate from merit-based scholarships.</p>

<p>So, by all means, enjoy your time in HS. But don't graduate regretting that you can't go to your dream school - maybe it has a unique program, or you click well with the students, or you love the sports - because you didn't give HS academics your all and either don't have the stats to get in, or can't afford it.</p>

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<p>While the top tier schools may have more opportunities and some better academics than others, you are right.</p>

<p>It is not the school that gets people places, it is their drive and ambition.</p>

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<p>HA! The school sure does help alot though.....</p>

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<p>It makes me feel superior.</p>

<p>Just kidding.</p>

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<p>The school may benefit you slightly if you already have the personality, intelligence, and ambition. However, it won't drastically impact your life and career if you don't happen to go to an Ivy unless you decide that your life is worthless and kill yourself since you couldn't get in (I wouldn't recommend this option). </p>

<p>The most important thing is going somewhere that fits you well and gives you the confidence and maybe some opportunities to succeed in your chosen field. Going to Harvard and being miserable the entire time is much worse than going to State U and enjoying an environment you should've chosen in the first place.</p>

<p>I really like what MissSuperFantastic said about doing your best in high school. My second semester sophomore year grades where similar to how yours are, mostly B's. And the reason was because I didn't see a point to trying, and I hated school. Luckily for me, I did great freshman year, and got focused during junior year, so that semester of "academic depression" didn't really hurt me as bad as it could've.</p>

<p>The best advice I can give you right now is that you really won't know where you want to go to college until you have to make the decision of which letter to accept. You may think that below-average state U is for you, until fall of senior year when you decide that going out of state is what you really want, then remember that "you don't care about doing well in school because it won't matter", so you now can't pursue your dream. </p>

<p>It's much better to open too many doors than to close the ones that matter.</p>

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<p>Its the people you are around and the instant recognition for the rest of your life. Its not a pre-req but I hear the top management at my firm all still talk about where they went to college.</p>

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<p>Getting into a top schools is justification for all of the hard work that overachievers naturally do. simple as that.</p>

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<p>"It's much better to open too many doors than to close the ones that matter"</p>

<p>I like that one, I guess it gives you options, if you still want to go to a non Ivy you can, but you have the option of going to a better school.</p>

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<p>it is just in human nature -- it makes us feel good to find all the available ladders that are thought to bring advancement in a society and then start climbing them -- just like with our ancestors, that whoever was superior in strength and wit got the best cave to live in and the best mammoth meat to eat -- and consequently felt better overall -- but it was also usually the one who felt insecure enough to risk conflict with others of the tribe who competed for the best cave and the best cut</p>

<p>i would say that feeling superior to others is the main driving force for all those seeking admission into competitive schools and disregarding others that might be just as good in their proposed field of study -- but prerequisite for wanting to feel superior all the time is feeling inferior a lot -- these people don't like to admit it to anyone, even themselves, that they need to seek out competition such that it will stroke their own ego if they succeed</p>

<p>one prof for whom i worked told me that profs who worked at prestigious schools were some of the most insecure people you would ever meet (he got his education in three places: Stanford, Harvard, and UCB, so he worked around these people for a while) -- and if you think about it, it makes sense that it is those who need their daily ego boost just like they need air, who engage in fierce competitions -- it is those people who feel that they lack in respect and admiration of others who will work 15+ hours a day without vacations, who would seek out the most challenging projects, demanding jobs, any possible way to compete with other people and prove their worth -- consequently, they end up in various high-stress jobs that often also pay well and are therefore “prestigious” -- are they happy? they probably are because they are getting exactly what they need -- will anyone else with other requirements be happy in their place? -- most likely not -- other people don't need to be constantly proving their worth because they already feel ok and have other things from which they derive happiness -- and consequently they will not be happy to follow in the steps of these overachievers -- the sheer amount of stress and work involved in a competitive situation that is the drug of choice for overachievers will bright little satisfaction to anyone else</p>

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<p>MissSuperFantastic, I have an uncle who went to dartmouth and I'd have to say that schools like colgate and dartmouth (which are pretty comparable in demographic), are awesome schools but they are very big party schools also. Duke is an amazing school, yet it is also a party school, as is UPenn. The list goes on...</p>

<p>Being an asian who wanted to go to a LAC, the demographic was very important to me, which is why I chose Wesleyan. But this thread isn't about demographics, it's about the 'prestige' factor.</p>

<p>I have friends going to Harvard, Princeton, Penn, Dartmouth, you name it. They're all awesome kids and I have 'competed' with them for most of high school, but we all wanted to see our hard work amount to something meaningful when we applied to colleges.</p>

<p>If you work your behind off all four years of high school earning straight A's in all your AP/Honors classes, get a 1500/2200 SAT score get 700+ on all your SAT II's and don't get into your top three schools, you're going to be dissapointed. Why? Because you've been told all along that hard work was your ticket to getting the very best. We're american, we always like buying the best product and getting the best deal. </p>

<p>It's also an ego boost, you get the 'WOW' factor in a convo if you're going to Harvard/Pton/Penn/'insert prestigious university', our misguided notions of what a prestigious college can do for us are scary. The thing is that, especially for grad school, going to harvard will help you get into Harvard law. Why? Because the way that admissions sees it is simply that the undergrad committee has already selected the cream of the crop for them.</p>

<p>There was a study done by someone at princeton which looked at how students who got into prestigious schools but chose not to attend did when compared to their ivy counterparts. There wasn't any statistical significance, that is they did as well.</p>

<p>Granted, I love UChicago and it was my first choice school. After getting deferred and then waitlisted (after getting rank 1 at my HS nonetheless haha), and then finally rejected, it wasn't meant to be. Certain students wouldn't fit in at state universities since they'd feel socially and academically awkward around the average student there. This feeling of not fitting in also drives some kids to go to the schools where there will be more students like them.</p>

<p>Truth be told, we tend to measure ourselves by what we accomplish and we feel cheated if we don't get what we think should be coming to us. This attitude is what drives people to get into the best colleges. As admissions gets even tougher now, expect some more lacs to become prominent as students realize that huge classes and overcrowding isn't for them.</p>

<p>I highly recommend state honors colleges/programs too. I would have loved to be at PSU's Schreyer honors college, yet going to a more prestigious school and one that I felt like I fit into more was the option I picked especially since the cost ended up being the same if not less (gotta love financial aid).</p>

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<p>"If you work your behind off all four years of high school earning straight A's in all your AP/Honors classes, get a 1500/2200 SAT score get 700+ on all your SAT II's and don't get into your top three schools, you're going to be dissapointed".
The above fits my sons profile - plus he had strong leadership ECs, strong recs and good essays. Rejected and waitlisted at his top two choices. One of his friends said he should try all the Ivies and the odds would guarantee him an acceptance to a least one of them. He didn't go for it - only one of the Ivies fit what he wanted in a school and that's the only one he applied to. In any case...he's going with his third choice - the honors college at his state U. But he's OK with it and very excited about the fall. Before he got his two rejections - he told us he was happy with the the schools that already accepted him. Good thing. It's OK to work hard - but these days, you really have to go in with your eyes open - getting into a top school is VERY difficult. There are just too many top students applying to those top 25 schools. Keep your options open and LOVE your matches and safeties! If you don't want to apply to those top 25, that's OK -even if you're a top student. There is WAY too much emphasis on prestige these days. And slipper1234, I have worked for multiple fortune 500s in senior roles and rarely hear anyone talk about where they went to school.</p>

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<p>I'd argue of course that the "ego boost" that comes with going to a top college esp. the ones that carry immediate name recognition like Harvard or Yale usually isn't really what students look for. It's usually very nice for a few weeks after getting in...telling your friends, having your parents tell the neighbors and feeling special for a while...all that usually goes away pretty soon. These are driven people...Harvard isn't the 'end all' for the students there; they usually have another goal (or goals) ahead of them. </p>

<p>The name is helpful...but I doubt anyone obsesses with it too much after some time.</p>

<p>Any highschooler looking to get in just for a "ego boost" is sorely immature and should really reexamine his/her priorities in life.</p>

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<p>Holy crap that was a long post on my part.</p>

<p>Tone Ranger, I was in a similar situation when college decisions came out too :-) Although my SAT(I and II) scores weren't all that great. </p>

<p>I had preferred not to give my schools a real hierarchy. Chicago was at number one and i thought i would get in, but i made it a point to only apply to schools i loved and would love to go to. In the end, I had to decide and ugh rank them. In the end I went for fit.</p>

<p>The truth is, there are a LOT of amazing schools out there for everyone. Even schools like University of Rochester get shot down on this site, and it's an amazing school. Elitist 'snobs' (I use that term loosely) are in for a life lesson when they run into people who they are looking to work for and have graduated from the state U. The university basically helps you land your first big job, after that you're mostly on your own since employers won't hire you if you can't do your job regardless of where you graduated from. </p>

<p>As for IBanking, wall street is all about the name. So if you do want to do IBanking, going to an Ivy school/duke/uchicago/etc would be helpful.</p>

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<p>"Elitist 'snobs' (I use that term loosely) are in for a life lesson when they run into people who they are looking to work for and have graduated from the state U."
Ridethecliche - funny you should mention that. I'm one of those State U grads - some of my direct reports over the years have been from places like Columbia and Duke. And one of the firms I worked for was (gasp!) a prestigious investment bank.</p>

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<p>Haha, give me a job when I graduate?
(Please?) :-P</p>

<p>A really good friend of mine got a full ride at Penn State Honors, and he got into UNC and chose to go there instead. If he had wanted to, he could have gotten into an ivy (and i'm not saying this for effect, the other student in our school who got the scholarship is going to harvard). Fit is important, and college is what you make of it. Though coming out of a well regarded and well respected school after undergrad and grad school do make things a <em>little</em> bit easier.</p>

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<p>When I was looking at schools years ago in Florida, I didn't go to UF because I wanted to redefine myself. Even though I was an athlete, I was defined in high school by my good grades (= "nerd"). Going to Rice allowed me to be defined by my other characteristics since everyone there had good grades. This was my reason for choosing an "elite" school. However, today the pressure to take AP courses and the greater difficulty of getting into top colleges has changed the high school experience. I don't know if I would have been able to take the pressure. I watch my son try to adjust, and he refuses to give up his down time. His compromise has been to give up some AP courses (he will only take 2 his junior year), but keep up his grades and all his ECs. Ultimately, if this workload is what works for him in high school, then whatever college he gets into will work for him because his high school experience will match his college experience. If you are working your tail off in high school then you may be over your head in college, and, likewise, if you goof off in high school then your college experience will likely be flat and undemanding. It's best to find the right load for you. Most of what the others have said on this thread is correct as well. Keeping doors open is very important. Choosing the right fit for you is also very important. That's why I follow this website. As my son learns more about himself, I want to be able to provide him with a list of schools that fit his interests. Also, I think the college name is important for landing that first job. It certainly helped me. A nationally known university will allow you to interview anywhere. A big state school or a good regional private school will help you in that state. Once again it's about keeping doors open.</p>

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<p>ricegal - I'd say there's a strong push at my son's high school to go to a school other than the state U - even though it's good school, especially for fields like eng or business. If it's because of fit, that seems fine to me. Going into this process, we actually thought our son would choose elsewhere. Since he didn't get into his top choices - it was down to an excellent honors program at his State U and three or four reasonably good privates (at 4 or 5 times the cost since he got multiple scholarships from his state U). He chose state U and he's happy - looking forward to a good balance of academics and fun. There are so many factors to consider. I DO see quite a few kids (and parents) setting themselves up for failure. I see parents with unrealistic expectations about where there kids can get in - putting WAY too much emphasis on making into a "top" school. We need to help our kids understand that, while fit is important, they can get a good education at many schools - not just the name brands. I also appreciate that my son had some sensitivity to cost. A rare thing in our community...</p>

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<p>Just to sum it up, Americans are prestige whores.</p>

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<p>Americans are conspicuous consumers.</p>