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They’re much less likely to haze, though, although there are some other groups that do so.</p>
<p>There are problems in Greek systems, particularly groupthink. There are problems in the Catholic Church, too. There’s a local country club I declined joining. I found it insular in a way that didn’t appeal to me. Youngest is in a pretty intense Greek system. Oldest quit in a very laid back one. People only have time for so many things. I think most people in the Greek system are pretty uninvolved by jr year anyway. </p>
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<p>No, “they” don’t. GDI is a self-descriptor that I’ve only ever used by non-Greek students.</p>
<p>It seems to be a point of pride because it’s always used in a rather arrogant (IMO) way. People who are part of Greek organizations aren’t nearly as obsessed with those who are not, as the “GDIs” seem to be with those who are members of Greek organizations. It’s kind of odd.</p>
<p>I agree with joblue - GDI was a self-descriptor used by non-Greeks. They “proclaimed” they were GDI’s.<br>
As for those of us who were Greek? We didn’t care. Whatever. I cared no more about whether someone else was Greek than I did whether they were in student government, the tennis team, or the chess club. Whatever. If they’re happy, I’m happy.</p>
<p>I absolutely agree that if you don’t have a ready-made EC such as a sport or other activity, being Greek gives you a ready-made social group. I would have stayed in an introverted shell if it hadn’t been for my house. It provided a smaller set of community. Others get that community through sports teams or theatre or musical organizations or what-not and that’s great. </p>
<p>But you guys all keep talking about exclusive social groups. I don’t know if you’re reacting to those off-the-wall, over-the-top systems that make us all roll our eyes, but I don’t know what you mean by “exclusive.” I was in sorority X, but I had friends in other sororities. If I wanted to go to dinner or library or a movie with them, well, I just went ahead and did so. No one fanned themselves in horrors. We were required to live in the house for one year (this was standard on our campus). The other years? LIve with whoever you want to live with. I happened to have roomed with a sorority sister my sophomore year and lived in the house both jr and sr years, but that was me. One of my closest friends had an entire set of non-Greek friends and she had an off campus apartment with them. Why would anyone care? </p>
<p>Well some of “them” do: <a href=“http://totalfratmove.com/?s=GDI”>You searched for GDI - TFM;
<p>It can’t be proved but all the evidence I’ve seen/heard suggests that the term was invented by people who were proud of their non-affiliation with Greek life and who used the initials as a means of mocking Greek “letters”.</p>
<p>It’s not surprising that it’s in pretty general use by now since the term was pretty old already when I was in school in the 70s. Anyway, who cares? GDI’s seem to spend much more time insulting Greek org members than frat/sororities do worrying about what non-Greeks think of them, or insulting them back. </p>
<p>I didn’t join a sorrority, but I never felt “excluded”. I had friends in lots of different houses. It just wasn’t my thing. But it was my Greek friends who called me a GDI. But they didn’t mean it in a nasty way and I don’t have a negative feeling about Greek life, either. It wasn’t for me, but so what? I didn’t think that meant it was a bad thing, either. Honestly, my theory was just to each his own. </p>
<p>Totalfratmove is a humorous (and crass) site. It doesn’t at all reflect my personal experience nor that of my husband and son. For one, it has a lot of that golf / gun-toting / southern fraternity schtick to it. </p>
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<p>Might you have if you’d rushed and not been picked up by any? I probably would have felt that way but my college didn’t have them.</p>
<p>Maybe ohmom. But that wouldn’t have happened to me. I could have gone Greek if I wanted. I just didn’t want to. </p>
<p>OHMomof2, from what I’ve seen of TotalFratMove in the past, it usually represents the absolute worst of Greek systems.</p>
<p>“over the years I’ve heard a lot of criticism of the Greek system by non-Greeks. But I seldom hear Greeks, former or present, criticizing non-Greeks for their choice not to join. Hmmm - wonder why that is?”</p>
<p>That’s a pattern that is pretty typical where one group is privileged vis-a-vis the other. It’s usually women, not men, who notice sexism, for example. Some students perceive that sort of power differential on their campuses based on Greek affiliation. Of course the privileged group won’t see a problem with the system – it’s privileging them. Who sees a problem, the windshield or the bug? I don’t have a dog in the race personally, but when someone comes out of college very down on the Greek system, I think it’s likely they saw some real problems that negatively affected the non-members.</p>
<p>This is leaving aside, of course, the issue of whether it’s truly a choice not to join. There’s an up-front financial cost, and the vast majority of NPC and NIC organizations had racial and religious exclusivity clauses as recently as the 70s. And you have to be selected. It’s a weighted choice, if a choice at all, for some non-Greeks.</p>
<p>Good point. </p>
<p>Good post, Hanna. </p>
<p>The question is not about whether or not being Greek feels exclusive to the people selected for the organization, it is how it feels to the people left out of the organization. I went to a school with a significant but not massive Greek presence, and felt very comfortable not rushing, but even at my campus there were a lot of hurt feelings when people who did got left out. And in certain social groups, pretty much everyone was rushing, so there really was pressure to get in and consequences if you didn’t.</p>
<p>There are a lot of situations in life that require formal mechanisms of exclusion. I don’t see why figuring out with whom you want to socialize needs to be one of them. </p>
<p>But for the tenth time, you aren’t obligated to socialize exclusively with members of your Greek house, or turn up your nose and walk the other way if someone not in your house walks by. Yes, we know there are schools like that, but snob that I am, they usually aren’t bastions of academic excellence either. </p>
<p>“from what I’ve seen of TotalFratMove in the past, it usually represents the absolute worst of Greek systems.”</p>
<p>TFM is over the top. It’s practically an Onion-style parody. </p>
<p>Yeah, TFM is more or less satire. The AEPi in my life wouldn’t recognize any of that.</p>
<p>And when I say exclusion, I don’t assume that sorority members are refusing to say hello to non-members.</p>
<p>Harvard lets non-students on its campus, permits its students to socialize with them, and will even, in certain circumstances, allow them to take particular classes there. Doesn’t mean it isn’t exclusive. Sororities are no different, except Harvard has good reasons for its exclusivity, and sororities, IMO, don’t. </p>
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I think this is part of the reason S1 wasn’t interested in Greek life. He was a sports journalism major - not too difficult intellectually but very time-consuming. He started with the sports staff at the campus radio station his first week of college and they quickly became his “tribe.”
Just about everyone in my house had an “outside” set of friends in their major, from their hometown, etc. As I mentioned upthread, I was a commuter so I had my “townie” friends and my co-workers from my off-campus job to hang around with, too.</p>
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<p>This pattern exists in other contexts, and I wonder whether it is a “privilege” issue. For example, anyone who has lived in both So Cal and Nor Cal knows that Nor Cal people are constantly putting down So Cal. (I have live in both areas for significant periods - 8+ years, which is why I know this). So Cal people couldn’t care less about their differences. Same, in my experience, with West Coast - East Coast, where I have also lived. (WC doesn’t care about EC, but EC calls WC things like, “land of fruits and nuts.”) Maybe the “privilege” is in the weather or something.</p>
<p>This also happens between college rivalries. One college is obsessed with putting the other down. The other could care less (Harvard-Yale, USC-UCLA, Stanford-UCB).</p>
<p>I know some will come on here and say I am wrong, that it happens both ways, and maybe it does, but I saw it as much more one-sided.</p>