Why NYU essay

Hello guys
I am a new member in a college confidential, and I want to ask you something.
Next week I am going to apply to NYUAD and I don’t know whether my essay is appropriate or not, so I want your opinions about my essay, and here it is:

“What do you want to do in your life? Everyone has been asked this question, hasn’t it? Well, when I was asked this question, I thought of Science.
Admittedly, I wasn’t so attentive for Science and the latest researches until one day, when our teacher asked a question that puzzled me and my classmates, the question was in the Holy Quran in the Pilgrimage chapter 22, verse 47: ( And they urge you to hasten the punishment. But (God) will never fail in his promise. And indeed, a day with your Lord is like a thousand years of those which you count) and from that moment, I perceived that we are insignificant for the greatness of God.
According to the astrophysicist Carl Sagan in his book “ the Dragon of Eden” he referred to the cosmic calendar, collapsing the entire history of the universe into a single year- that means the WWII happened before a moment!
In addition, Albert Einstein in his general theory of relativity demonstrated that if you travelled into space in a very high speed, your time would get slower, although you would not feel that as your heart rate would be slower, and all biological and other processes around you would be slower, too.
However, the Noble Quran introduced that 1400 years ago, it said in The Crierian chapter 25 verse 45: ( Have you considered how He extends the shadow, and if he willed, He could have made it stationary? Then He made the sun for it an indication.
From that day, I determined to be a Scientist to discover more and more things. Furthermore, when I heard about NYU and their regard for the Sciences generally, I firmly resolved to be a Scientist and build my own dreams.
I still remember the quote from the activist Wilma Mankiller: “ the secret of our success is that we never, never give up” - and hey!- physicists united the electronic and magnetic forces, so I hope to puzzle out what we couldn’t notice, who knows?! “

I am eager to know your opinions about my essay!

You should never post your essays online unless you want them plagiarized. And I’m sorry, but I don’t think yours is well-written. It’s hard for me to follow the logic, and I’m not seeing how the Quran quotes relate to the overall topic.

going to steal your essay

I’m going to apply in NYUAD for fall 2019
Buddy, I have a suggestion for you please try to think deeply about why you want to study there and what makes you more and more passionate about NYUAD.
What you had written was more scientific and uneasy to follow why you want to be there.
But you tried and that’s more important. So great appreciation for that.