<p>My parents (especially my mother) would always be involved in my schoolwork all the way up till when I began high school. Then, they began to push my brother more (who likes to slack off sometimes) and left me to do my own thing. I'm glad they did because now when I get a bad grade on a test, it's my problem and not the family's.</p>
<p>My parents have never been pushy simply because I am very self-motivated. They actually tried to discourage me from taking all APs this year and almost all APs last year. The interesting part is when I haven't started on something big and my mom starts yelling at me that I won't have time to finish it, when I ALWAYS get everything done and on time. <em>shakes head</em> I'll never understand. </p>
<p>I've known I wanted to go to Wake Forest since 8th grade, the only thing that has changed over time are my majors/minors. So basically, there has been no "college search process" since I've always felt it was the right school for me. Although, if I decided to change my mind and apply somewhere else I'm sure there would be rumbling at my house.</p>
<p>This is a very interesting thread. Though I am not into the college process yet, I will be attending Choate Rosemary Hall (an elite boarding school) as a freshman next year. I also applied to Andover and was waitlisted.</p>
<p>Hm... well, grade-wise, my mom is happy if I get over an A, and that's what I strive for, too, so anything above that is self-driven. My dad doesn't involve himself in my schoolwork much because I live with my mom, but he helps me out with projects and doesn't mind when I get a bad grade, but tries to help me. I usually don't study or anything with my mom because I basically self-tutor myself.</p>
<p>The thing is that my whole family - basically my dad's side and even my mom - wanted me to go to Andover, even after I was WLed. When I got into Choate, my mom thought I wouldn't fit in because I wasn't "preppy" enough and that people at Andover were too smart to preppy (I know, really). But Choate is more amazing than Andover, in my opinion. I've been obsessed with it since 7th grade, and I'm not kidding. I think it's the perfect school, and that's what matters, but my mom is very focused on reputation. My dad is basically the same, but less blindly so. My mom just follows other people's advice without thinking about it - she won't listen to An Inconvenient Truth, for example, but listens when someone she hardly knows tells her that global warming isn't real.</p>
<p>Overall, my parents are supportive of whatever grades I get (once time I got a 78, but my mom just said do better next time). So I'm not pressured by them, really. Only occasionally. I don't mind, though, and I love my parents dearly, and I'm very independent when it comes to schoolwork, so I don't think I'll have a drastic problem at boarding school. </p>
<p>I'm a huge procrastinator but I manage to get everything done if I want to. I'll have to learn a lot of time management skills before Choate, though!!</p>
<p>Pretty much hands off now, though some of the time there are comments after the situation was made. They offfered their opinion only when asked for it.</p>
<p>my parents are encouraging but not pushy... but they are always asking me questions about when tests are and how i think i'm doing and... suffocating me a little... not in a "you have to go to harvard" way but just a "you have to try your hardest all the time" way. which i do anyways, so it annoys the heck out of me when they bug me.</p>
<p>on the contrary, my parents want me to go to state school. they don't really want to pay for a really expensive private school unless it's really prestigious... they think our state school is great, and it's pretty good, but i am 95% sure that it would be an awful fit for me, atmosphere-wise.</p>
<p>Haha, I'M the pushy one in my house! My parents are uber supportive, but also uber hands off. </p>
<p>Example-</p>
<p>"Hey mom, can we go to visit University of Chicago"</p>
<p>"OK"</p>
<p>"Really!"</p>
<p>"Yeah, but you have to plan it!"</p>
<p>Basically, my parents philosophy is I gotta do the leg work myself, make my own mistakes, ect. and they will do what they can to make it happen.</p>
<p>All in all, our system works good. There is peace in our house about college (not laundry though) and my trip to Chicago was even better because I had planned it, booked hotel/flights ect. </p>
<p>Plus, I'm reallly type-a and love planning trips!</p>
<p>Interesting stories. My parents used to be concerned over my classes and my schoolwork... until I reached middle school. I kind of like their hands-off approach, but like other people on this thread, I half-wished they were like my friends' asian parents and pushed me to do my best. What really ticks me off, however, is when, after a bout of not caring about my grades, they tell me to be a doctor/pharmacist--regardless of my disintered in science.</p>
<p>Sometimes I get mad, but as they don't really know how the whole college thing works (I am SO not going to tell them my SAT score or what it means), I can get by with anything. Right now I'm enjoying what's left of my freedom before they really get on my case and tell me to major in biology.</p>
<p>Totally hands-off. My dad went to my high school graduation, but other than that, I don't think he ever saw a report card or knew what I was doing. I used to travel extensively for a debate team, and every once in a while he'd call me and ask where I was because he'd need me to drive my brother somewhere, and I'd be in another state. My mom was somewhat more in touch, but barely. I think she wanted to be supportive but having never gone or applied to a four year college, I think it was difficult for her to relate. </p>
<p>While I don't hold it against them, I do wish my parents were more involved. Not in terms of being "pushy", but there does come a point when lack of involvement feels like lack of support. I also think kids who have parents who are on top of the college game have an advantage over kids whose parents aren't in touch with things.</p>
<p>My mom was definitely hands-off. She pushed me in middle school to be in the gifted and talented program, and once I did that, never really pushed/motivated me again. She was satisfied as long as I was passing my classes in high school (her excuse was that she never had good grades in high school, so she couldn't hold me to higher standards). She never went to college, so it was a bit difficult learning about the whole college process on my own. She was extremely proud when I got into my top choice of college, but I know that she'd be equally satisfied if I was going to community college.</p>
<p>I honestly wouldn't have minded if she was more involved.</p>
<p>My parents don't push me at all. For me, it's self motivation. I personally wish my parents would push me.</p>
<p>My parents get on my case if I get Bs or lower. They're not uber-controlling, but they are very conscious, which I suppose is for the best, but gets on my nerves sometimes.</p>
<p>They're both actually.</p>
<p>In terms of actually visiting, they didn't care what schools I visited, they just made sure we visited some schools.</p>
<p>My dad leaves this stuff to my mom. In turn, my mom is supportive and expects high grades from me, but does not place undue pressure on me. I felt a lot of pressure in middle school for some reason from my parents, but in high school, they backed off.</p>
<p>Two words.
Asian Parents</p>
<p>My mom was completely hands off but was very supportive. I was on top of everything I needed to be on top of, so it wasn't a problem. Now, I'm getting a top notch education at a good school, and I know how to manage my own life/time.</p>
<p>My dad has never been involved in my academics, but throughout middle school and high school my mom was constantly on my back telling me to study. I however had no motivation to succeed at that time, so I did the bare minimum to keep my mom off my back. After High School, I went to a community college and at that point both my parents just told me to "do as you please." Last year, after years of being spoonfed by my mom, I filled out the FAFSA, CSS Profile, and all my applications without any help. I was accepted to a few good schools, and will be attending Northwestern.
I guess when it comes down to it, YOU have to be the one who wants it the most.
My parents did the complete opposite things up to High School (my mom was constantly pressuring me while my dad didn't really do anything) which didn't work. Them being supportive of me going to community college was definately very important. If they had forced me to go to a local state school, I probably would have been very unhappy now.</p>
<p>Wow. It seems that everyone's parents are the same as mine. Does anyone actually have the stereotypical CC parents, the type of people who actively push you to succeed, closely monitor your work habits/grades, are signed up to receive your SAT scores by email, e.t.c.?</p>
<p>well I think this thread might tell us that the stereotypical CC parents that we imagine do not exist.</p>
<p>my parents do not actively push me to succeed, but they talk to me about B's on my report card, and it's unspoken that they would be terribly disappointed if I did not attend a top college. sometimes I wish they would help me a bit rather than just tell me I need to do well in school, i.e. I totally had to purchase a Java book and get myself into AP Comp Sci, and my parents know nothing about my extracurriculars and never get involved, but I realize that I am their first experience with the American education system, both of them being immigrants from China, and I can't really hold that against them. they're doing the best they know how to, and it works out all right - I've always been able to buy anything relating to review books, science team, or track that I've wanted.</p>
<p>My parents were not only hands-off, but they tied my own. They didn't know a thing about what was going on in my education, nor did they care about college application processes. So I'd figure, fine, hopefully they would at least support extracurriculars. Nope. No rides, no nothing there either. On top of that, they'd make stuff needlessly harder by grounding me in the form of locking my computer up so I'd be unable to type my essays (they felt I spent too much time on the computer when I was merely doing schoolwork, but when I told them I had to do my homework assignments, they did not care). I'm not even joking. It made high school so much worse.</p>
<p>I always envy these kids who have involved parents who genuinely care about their child's education and wellbeing. They have no idea how nice they have it. That net of safety is always there for you to lean back into. When I ever have kids, I am going to ensure they have what I didn't.</p>
<p>"However, the slightest sign that I'm slipping in something, and they get all *<strong><em>ed off, that's what *</em></strong>es me off, especially when I'm so self-sufficient as it is."</p>
<p>Exactly! I hate it ><</p>