Partying at Boarding Schools

I saw this thread (Are there any party boarding schools? - #10 by Penguins75)

In the post, there was a very valuable link posted:

Do you know if there is public information similar to Andover’s for the remaining Ten Schools?

Though I know that teenagers behave like teenagers everywhere, I still need to admit that many responses in Andover’s survey were shocking to me. Especially answers regarding drugs, sex, and alcohol.

Based on your experiences from Ten Schools, which schools have stricter rules for drugs/sex/alcohol? Which schools deliver a strong message that it does not tolerate breaking rules for drugs/sex/alcohol? Based on your experiences/information, which schools treat students fairly when it comes to violating the rules regardless of whether a student is entitled/FP/FA?

I don’t know if Hotchkiss is one of the Ten Schools, but in any case they have “no chance” policy towards drugs and alcohol. If you are caught, you are out, no chances. The exception is if you go to the Health Center because you or a friend are worried – the school doesn’t want to discourage kids from getting help, so kids are not penalized.

Some say this policy makes it easier for kids to say “no” because the stakes are so high. My current Hotchkiss senior feels this way. Others think kids do stupid things, and it might be better to focus on learning from the experience and not be so punitive. I am in this camp. The policy is pretty much constantly considered but so far most (students, faculty, administrators, trustees) support the policy.

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Saw the Andover “State of the Academy”…
Immediately rescinded my kids application!

This is satire, right?

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30% of students cheated
80% used drugs
26% sent nudes
2.9% were sexually assaulted
43% of top students used study drugs

If you’ve read any applications from some of these schools, it can be quite entertaining when an “incident” gets written up and then has to be explained by the student, hilarious actually, but it’s certainly not good for the applicant, especially when applying to ultra competitive colleges and universities where the stakes are high. The kid is pretty much cooked after that. Remember, there are a few kids attending those from foreign countries where the legal drinking age is much younger than 21, and where running around in the middle of the night is a tad bit safer than it is here. If your kid befriends someone wild, bored, or rebellious, that might not be a good thing, and if they get caught…Whoa! If your child is mature, focused, and not easily influenced, then these schools can be wonderful opportunities to gain knowledge and coursework not easily available at your average private school.

my main concern is that they will lose opportunities to cheaters, especially in such a competitive environment
I don’t want an environment where sex, drug use, and sexual assault are normalized

OP: If partying while enrolled in a boarding school is your objective, then consider attending a Swiss boarding school.

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I’m not an expert, but I don’t get the impression that the cheating is any worse than it is at the other top public and private schools around the country. I can’t tell you how many times a large public high school’s valedictorian somewhere has told me about being accused of something they simply didn’t do, that was just trumped up to sabotage a hard working student viewed as an academic threat. For me, it’s the sabotage that’s going on at some of these places that worries me most. Kids are scared to tell their best friend where they have applied because of retaliation, and sometimes that retaliation can come from the friend’s parent and not even the “friend.” If it were me, and I was worried about the sex, drugs, and assault, I’d maybe look at some of the boarding schools that are all-girl or boy. That might curb a bit of the assault and sex worries?

I assume it was not clear what I meant with “partying” . I was referring to "drugs/sex/alcohol section of the publication. If it was clear and still the same response, oh well…

I agree, the statistics are a little concerning, but like another poster said, they don’t seem to be too off from other top public and private schools. Did you actually pull your child’s application from Andover? I can’t tell if that’s an exaggeration or not because doing that so quickly seems to discredit the hours of work that must have gone into the application.

Didn’t mention, but I did show them the statistics and let them make the decision before I rescinded

I am sorry to tell you that I think this is fairly normal. Both in top boarding schools and public high schools.

Again, start speaking to your kid about how to make their own decisions now, before they go to BS. If they don’t want to do drugs they probably won’t be pressured to but if you nix every school where kids admit to drug use and sex you will end up homeschooling.

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Shouldn’t the nudie pic part be a higher percentage though? I mean, it gets boring in those dorms. Gotta have something to do.

If anything, I think it could even be a good thing that Andover is being transparent about these statistics

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In case anyone is reading these stats reported here without reading the report itself –
Just want to point out that these are not the numbers I am seeing in the report. For example, 11% used study drugs according to the report. The 43% number that is near that area of the report is for percentage of student leaders who have ever consumed any alcohol or drug in the dorm. Well, I’m going to say that 10th/11th/12th graders (assuming “leaders” are maybe skewing not freshman and probably mostly juniors and seniors) – this number for having ever had alcohol in dorm doesn’t surprise me in the least for kids who are 17, 18, 19.

80% of all students used drugs? Where did that come from? I can’t even try to build that number and reconcile it to the report. But for example, 69% of freshman say they have not ever had alcohol recreationally on or off campus at all. 24% of seniors say never alcohol recreationally at all, ever, not on campus or off campus. So I really don’t see how if even the seniors have 25% of them never having had any alcohol anywhere recreationally, how possibly it makes sense that 80% of the entire population is doing drugs.

So while I don’t love peeling back the covers of the world of teen behavior because I have four teenagers, let’s at least get the stats right that we decide to freak out over.

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Agreed that compilation of stats is off. I didn’t mean to endorse it by quoting.

But kids are drinking and doing drugs and sexually active everywhere. Each family needs to be responsible for talking to their own kids and not expect a perfect environment to keep teens away from these behaviors.

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I totally agree about transparency and value the information Andover provided. I wish the other schools had similar surveys.

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There is another one. Similar questions but not quite as detailed. It aggregated the data from 4 boarding schools, including Andover and Exeter. I can’t remember which other two, maybe Choate?

I read it a couple of months ago and can’t find it doing a quick google or CC search. I’ll hunt for it today and see if I can post the link.

Here it is:

It is from the Eight Schools Association and includes answers from Andover, Exeter, Deerfield and NMH. Apparently there were answers from Hotchkiss too but they couldn’t be included since they didn’t receive timely permission.

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@MacJackAttack
Thanks for finding that - it is more in line with what I’ve seen and heard at BS. That most of the drinking and drugs are off campus, so kids may drink on vacation but not when they are in school. Even at schools I know where the kids party HARD, it’s mostly on break away from school.

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