<p>This is my other account, I’m not a ■■■■■ :p</p>
<p>You have to go with your gut feeling after your revisit. As you can see there are positive reviews here about DA. 35% of the kids are on FA, so you’ll have enough people to choose your friends from.</p>
<p>Did anyone go to the Exeter revisits?? Were there Exeter revisits??</p>
<p>@7dad- just read your SPS revisit- had to laugh at your comment about food - yes Groton’s food is amazing- off to their revisit today- post to come!</p>
<p>@DAndrew, I think I agree with you, but the “revisit is magical/fit is everything” crowd is hard to persuade so I usually don’t weigh in. I will now, though, because of the kids reading these boards who may be disappointed if their revisit isn’t magical, particularly if they only have one option.</p>
<p>I think a revisit is a fine way to choose between options that check out equally well for a students on paper (no reason not to go to the school where you enjoyed revisit more), and a great way for kids to have something to look forward to in Sept, but I’m not sure that a few hours at at school can’t tell you if “your people” are there or not—you are usually matched with one student, you attend a tiny sliver of classes, you meet that student’s friends. It’s not representative. </p>
<p>My daughter didn’t fall in love with her school (Andover) at revisit. Her personality is too analytical for that. But she decided that it presented her best academic option and the biggest challenge, and that’s what she valued more than an immediate feeling of connection. Was it the right choice? Unless things are a disaster one never knows, but it is working extremely well for her after nearly 3 years. </p>
<p>The range of personalities and types of student within a school is big, and there’s lots of ways that different kids can end up fitting at a school that has the academic level the kids need. They just may not see that at revisit day.</p>
<p>SevenDad/family’s reaction to the SPS revisit was honest. He is entitled to have and share his feelings, all of which were given in the most positive spirit.</p>
<p>DAndrew and Lemonade1, why are you owed an explanation more to your liking? Why do you try to explain away or minimize in some way SevenDad’s reaction to SPS? I have read his many posts since he, his wife and his daughter started the boarding school journey. The posts have been thoughtful, interested and studied.</p>
<p>It’s great to see a would-be boarding school family look carefully at their options and make a decision that’s best for the applicant, not bow to somebody else’s standard or opinion. The top schools in the country offer revisits for a reason.</p>
<p>Having visited quite a number of schools and now been through the revisit process, I am comfortable saying that personal background and taste are critical to the evaluation process for a family and child. For those entering this process, I suggest selecting an appropriate range of schools to consider based on academics and ECs and then doing the field work to get to know what the kids at those schools are really like. Obviously it’s harder if you’re not from New England, but finding kids on a forum like this and getting acquainted virtually can certainly help. I’ve found current students at most schools prepared to answer questions. By asking the right questions about student life you should be able to arrive at a reasonable list of schools. The initial campus visit and revisit can then fit into a context already established and provide the clearest picture possible. Clearly there’s no guarantee of success, but I hope these suggestions are helpful.</p>
<p>Oh, my, I meant no disrespect to SevenDad or anyone else. I actually thought it was refreshing to see how a revisit on a school that usually gets rave revisit reviews could actually tell a family that it was not the best place. And I would have used the revisit exactly as his family did, to choose the alternative. </p>
<p>Maybe I should have kept my comments in a more personal context: my daughter was choosing between continuing at her school, and going to Andover. The angels didn’t sing and rainbows didn’t come out at her revisit. In fact, she was rather discouraged. But I had been to the parents sessions, and knew that the school had a lot to offer her. Before she turned down Andover, she went on a second revisit and attended the parents’ sessions to see that perspective (a luxury that only someone relatively local could do!). That helped her to decide. So, for her the revisits were crucial, but in a different way than for some other posters. She really didn’t get a gut feeling about what a good fit it would turn out to be from her revisit.</p>
<p>To add to Lemonade’s sentiment, I think that revisits are important but not for “gut reactions.” It’s the time to dig in deeper, ask hard questions, look closely at the areas of interest (i.e. do they pay attention to the tuba player), and talk to lots of kids and parents and others to decide if this is the place for 4 years. My D went to revisits and picked a school that “felt right” to her, mainly, she thought the kids seemed happier and more diverse. Beyond that gut reaction, there were some objective limitations that we talked about. Now, 2 years in, some of those limitations have become more pronounced and she is not as well served as we would like. Not a disaster, but not the experience with hoped for (not to mention us questioning the return on investment which is huge).</p>
<p>I don’t remember anyone talking about a “magical” experience coming of a revisit.</p>
<p>What we have said is that parents should override the tendency to covet schools based on reputation if it is clear the student won’t thrive there. Fit isn’t about “angels” singing or the heavens opening up and not one of us has said that. It IS about finding the school of all the options presented that will fulfill the student the most - or reject them and return to a home school because they will not.</p>
<p>Clearly - if @lemonade’s daughter - for instance - declared a school gave her the best challenge, then that in itself is a validation of “fit.”</p>
<p>I wish we could just concede that many parents on CC have chased the “magical HADES” train to the exclusion of other options and have - in some cases - not been happy with the outcome. Why put a student through that? Whose dream are they chasing - their own, or their parents?</p>
<p>Instead, now we’re asking parents to have a more balanced view. It’s one thing to choose a popular school because you drank the “top-tier Koolaid”. It’s another to choose it after comparing other options and concluding it’s the best fit for the student’s emotional and academic needs. That does - as @erlanger suggests - involve more than just a superficial view of the culture.</p>
<p>Hence, I think @SevenDad has done the board a service by shifting the focus from standard “my school is better than your school” politics, to objective and subjective observations from parents as they go through the process. Also - it should be considered that there are going to be some students who - no matter what school they enter - will not thrive in a BS environment. </p>
<p>I can’t tell you how valuable parent observations were – in PM’s – when we were first navigating the same course. The level of honesty about the good, the bad and the so-so was refreshing (still is).</p>
<p>Like everything in life, everything is about you “feeling” and also “thinking” if this is the right fit for you as a student or for a parent to see if the place is the one that will help the kid to grow. Despite the fact that these are great schools, we are talking about high schools. You will get some of the things you want now but wait for college to have more opportunities. My D right away was part of the classes she was in. She argued and wrote something to share with the class, etc. For us it was more of an opportunity to see how the kids interacted with one another and to see if that place was the best option for her. no magic, just a the high school for your kid.</p>
<p>TParent, all I said is that in general revisiting is not a critical determining factor. By the time of revisiting, prospective families have gone through extensive research of the school, serious analysis of how what the school offers can match their needs/interests, school visits, interviews and application process. The schools they do revisit are the ones they have serious interest in. They come to revisits to confirm/verify their perceptions of these schools. However, revisit is just one day of organized events (no matter how accurately they may reflect daily life). Unless something goes seriously wrong, which is possible though unlikely, one would leave the revisit either with confirmed interest or with doubt (hint: something you don’t see doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist - it may just be that you didn’t get to see it on the revisit day). I have reasons to believe that 7D’s case is an exception rather than the norm. For most people, don’t expect a revisit to be magical especially when you try to decide on two or more close calls.</p>
<p>Some argue the “vibe” as a determinant. Really? At this stage of the game? Without running out of all other differentiators? If that’s your way so be it. I just don’t get it.</p>
<p>Don’t underestimate weather as a factor as to “feel” during a revisit.</p>
<p>I’m really enjoying all of these observations. We are still trying to figure out where ds will be going, and it is helpful to hear opinions on “fit” and revisits.</p>
<p>Two schools. Two revisits. Same situation: My C was being hosted by a student taking him to a language class he did not understand. First school: he sat through the class twiddling his thumbs. Second school: another student (host’s friend) took the initiative and took my C to a science class, which he thoroghly enjoyed.</p>
<p>So often the fit between the student host and the applicant makes an enormous difference.</p>
<p>^^^definitely - just like, at the very beginning of the process, one’s tour guide can really impact the impression made upon the candidate about the school.</p>
<ul>
<li><p>Basic format/schedule of your revisit day
Thursday pm- student performances in the performance arts center, students talking about their school experiences, then students went to “parlor” at the Headmaster’s house for cookies and games while parents met current parents
Friday- breakfast and chapel. Then kids went to classes with student chaperones, while parents had meetings with faculty, tours, free time to shop in the store, lunch with the AD. Kids lunched together- met back up at 2PM</p></li>
<li><p>Did the revisit confirm your interest in the school or did it dissuade you from matriculating?
Utterly confirmed my D’s decision, delighted my husband who had not gone to the interview and firmly convinced him we were making the right decision</p></li>
<li><p>What specific things about the revisit pushed you in either direction?
The students were warm and engaged, friendly and “normal” - if you see what I mean. Classes my daughter sat in on were very challenging and fun, teachers and admissions staff were so warm. Campus was as gorgeous as we remembered, my husband was especially sold by all the squash courts ( he is a squash player)</p></li>
<li><p>Did you learn anything new/surprising about the school?
Not really</p></li>
<li><p>Something you wish you had learned which you didn’t
Nothing</p></li>
<li><p>How was the food?
YUMMY!!!</p></li>
<li><p>How were the classes you sat in on?
My D loved them</p></li>
</ul>
<p>Conclusion: we are 100% happy with our decision to matriculate there- my D did NOT want to leave the campus- serious fears that she would try to “stowaway” until the end of the term!! LOLOL</p>
<p>Last tidbit of information from Groton: 90 admits out of 1100 applications this year, this year was the best year in 16 years for matriculations ( using % of kids getting into their first choices as reference)</p>
<p>No. I don’t think Groton has a yield of 98.8%. :D</p>
<p>The letter sent to us said that there were 89 SPACES for 1100 applicants. I’m sure they ADMITTED more than 90! How many more, I have no idea.</p>