I would encourage you to spend some time on these boards, especially right now, when both “College Selection” and “College Admissions” are filled with threads by high stat students bemoaning that they were shut out of elite schools and wondering whether they really have to go to their “safety” which they have always considered beneath them.
When you throw in the quest for merit money, the list looks different than the top 20 universities and small colleges. Look at the “stickied” threads on automatic merit money. The general rule is that students who are at the tippy top of stats for the next rung of schools can get some nice merit money – schools which are often mentioned as giving merit money are Tulane, Case Western, Emory (I believe). Liberal arts colleges (LACs) which give merit money to attract the high stat kid include a number of midwest schools, including Kenyon, Oberlin, Grinnell, Denison, Ohio Wesleyan. Research merit money carefully, as many of these schools look to see if a student has demonstrate interest (and is therefore likely to accept). Public flagships, such as Michigan, Wisconsin, Virginia and North Carolina, do not need to use merit money to attract the out of state student so those are not typically a good source of merit money.
Although we have not looked at loans for our kids, I have read here often enough that a student themselves can only borrow $5500. per year, which is not going to make much of a drop in a $60 EFC (expected family contribution). So loans then become parent loans, and that is when you get crazy posts like $240k loans for top 20 school vs. full ride at top 50 school.
The Ivies and the usual other suspects, like Duke, Northwestern, Vanderbilt, Wash U, Chicago etc., assume that the qualified applicant will have high stats, and are looking for what else the student will contribute. Other considerations are qualities such as being a recruited athlete, serious musician or artist, researchers who are Intel Finalists etc., students who are not just excellent students but will contribute to a rich life on campus. Many parents on CC have advised that there is not a significant difference in admissibility between a 34-36, or a 3.9 vs. 4.0 unweighted – schools expect that range of kids, then they look deeper to see which students will create their next class.
A long way of saying – your son has a fabulous record which will allow you both to craft a list which offers admission and financial safeties, with good merit money, and you can add some reaches. I would suggest researching the wealth of data available on the Common Data Set for each school you are interested in, simply google it, with the school name. It is a form which identifies number of applicants, acceptances, numbers of students applying and being admitted ED, which factors in the admissions application are considered Very Important/ Important/Considered/ Not Considered.
Good luck in your search.