<p>Hey,</p>
<p>Four days before deadline, I have spent countless hours to write a good essay for Penn, my top school. I'm applying for CAS RD and have just finished writing my essay. In hopes of sending a noteworthy essay, I come here to CC to find people who might be willing to critic my essay, not just the grammatical framework but more importantly on the substance of my piece.</p>
<p>If you are willing (which I would extremely be grateful for) please message me.</p>
<p>The proper person to go to is your English teacher or guidance councilor. I’m sure that they will be more then willing to help you.</p>
<p>^ To be fair, some people have guidance counselors and english teachers that basically suck. My counselor won’t even write in complete sentences. My english teacher is going to be the cause of me not being able to apply to two colleges because he still hasn’t done my recommendations for them, even though I asked him over a month ago, provided him with all needed materials, and reminded him several times. This is my personal experience, of course, but it could be similar to that of the OP.</p>
<p>Anyway, monsieurmikee, I’m applying also so I probably wouldn’t be of much help if I critiqued it. However, good luck to you.</p>
<p>I have had checked my grammar several times, and coorected by other peers as well. I am fairly confident with how I write. My main concern is the substance of the essay. I have spent several hours thinking and researching Penn to see what I would include.</p>
<p>Nat, how did you approach the essay? Did you state specifics of the college you are applying to? Or did you generalize on it? Did you focus on your ‘traits and qualities’ Or did you list down specific researches and community service you are involved/want to be involved in? Wish you all the luck as well.</p>
<p>Sorry this is late, monsieur. I’m still writing mine. But so far, I was specific, but not extremely specific. Such as, I didn’t just say ‘I want to join a writing club because I adore literature,’ instead I said ‘I want to participate in the famous Kelly Writer’s House, detail detail.’ </p>
<p>With academics, I stated the specific majors and program options I’m interested in, but didn’t go as specific to mention classes or professors. I think it would be great if someone does do that, but only if they are extremely knowledgeable of the class/professor (either having actually sat in, or tracked the professor in the news for a while). Otherwise I’m sure the adcom will be able to detect that it’s just name dropping.</p>
<p>I didn’t list my traits, I feel like that is deducible from what you convey you wish to do there. If I say I want to do all this community service, I don’t think they need me to reiterate the obvious that I’m caring and aware. I think, from their very carefully worded prompt, that they really want you to focus on what you WILL DO there, not really who you are or why penn is so great (which is probably why they didn’t just do the typical ‘Why Penn,’ because their tired of those responses). </p>
<p>Anyway, yes luck to the both of us! It’ll take luck for me to even finish this on time lol</p>