ABI: Athlete "bashing" incident

<p>Congratulations to the Ferrante family - You are a TEN!</p>

<p>ok
what am I doing wrong
–I am getting a long winded NFL interview and there is nothing on 5 pages of video links is that title…
camn someone post the link or pm me the link</p>

<p>pm’ing you the link!</p>

<p>Amazing this young lady can compete in 5 sports–2 fall and 2 spring season, club soccer in winter and she’s a rank bi-athlete!..and a 4.1 wow!!!</p>

<p>It’s annoying how people perceive athletes to be “dumber” than other people. For example, when this one girl in Spanish class thought she was smarter than me. I was talking about track a lot to my table mates, and basically kind of being a “jock.” Basically she acted a lot smarter than me at all times, being very condescending. It was then very funny when we got the results of our first test back, and I got a 97 and she got an 87. She asked in a snarky voice “What did you get,” and I showed her. She responded sullenly, “Oh.” Then later that month, we got the PSAT back, she asked me what I got (again in a snarky voice), and I had beaten her by almost 500 points. She shut up after that.</p>

<p>mayhew, thanks for your kind words. I really do appreciate them.</p>

<p>Pacheight hit the nail on the head. Being a parent of a high schooler can be tough on the ego if little Johnny or Susie doesn’t turn out the way Mom and Dad expected they would, or worse, bragged for years that they would. The mean comments stem from disappointment in their children and their desire to blame it on someone or something else.</p>

<p>Since D has been victimized in the past by jealous parents and their kids, I confess to some deliberate bragging because I proactively let slip my D’s SAT scores and mentioned a lot how much homework her AP classes entailed. The objective was to head off the dumb-jock-stealing-my-smart-kid’s-spot-at-Harvard type comments. It worked.</p>

<p>PS-Sammy, did your friend’s D commit to Stanford very recently? She wasn’t listed in their press release about their class of 2010 recruits.</p>

<p>I don’t think things are helped when all over CNN this morning was the conversation about low graduation rates of basketball teams participating in the NCAA tournament. Maryland graduates less than 10% of their players? Appalling. For schools to blame high schools and below for their dismal preparation for college level work is a cop out in my opinion. They’re bringing these kids in. They’re the ones that schedule games for weeknights to coincide with television viewing. And they’re the ones who bring in the millions of dollars. This is not talking about stanford or the Ivies, but until schools stop recruiting kids with the minimum of academic standards in light of their athletic prowess, the bashing of high achieving athletes with or without high academic stats isn’t going to stop any time soon.</p>

<p>During my junior year in college, six of us shared a house. Five of us were varsity athletes. One of my housemates became an orthopedic surgeon, one is a cardiologist, one is a chemical engineer, and one is a college administrator. The housemate who was not a varsity athlete never graduated. Over the years some of my best students have been scholarship athletes. I am a strong supporter of college athletics. Having said all that, there is no question that many athletes are accepted while students who are much better qualified are rejected. I have seen it when I teach and I see it in my kids’ schools. Let me stress that I am not saying that many or most athletes are weak students; rather, I am saying that many athletes would not have been accepted but for their athletic prowess. The same point holds about any other hook. </p>

<p>We all hear comments from time to time that make us gnash our teeth. D1 will study engineering so we occasionally hear the (usually well-intentioned) comment that engineering schools are looking for girls, with the implication that she will get the nod over a better-qualified boy. D2 intends to play a sport in college, so I expect to hear something like what the OP heard. When I do, I will probably agree—as long as the other party acknowledges that my kid is not one of the transgressors. :)</p>

<p>I reference Regina Britt’s Life Lessons - specifically 1, 3, 13, 25, 28, 29 and especially 26. I’m a big fan of 26.</p>

<p>[Regina</a> Brett](<a href=“http://www.reginabrett.com/life_lessons.php]Regina”>http://www.reginabrett.com/life_lessons.php)</p>

<p>My two cents…People are going to think whatever they want to think. You have no control over it. You can control whether or not you want to be around them, or listen to their comments. Sad but true. Your true will friends will emerge and congratulate your son or daughter for their accomplishment. Yes, sometimes people will say hurtful things because they have no clue what it is like to walk in your son’s or daughters shoes, and probably never will. Step over it and move in.</p>

<p>TheGFG, Ferrante is shown on the alphabetical athlete list on Dyestat as having signed with Stanford for mid and long distance.</p>

<p>coase: somewhat agree, at the schools in our district I see 2 levels of athletes; 1) a lot of top academic athletes (about 40 this year, three high schools) having essentially their pick of most top D1 or D3 schools depending on their athletic ability. 2) good kids with solid academics (3.0 types) who are excellent athletes and therefore getting opportunities at colleges a level above what their academics alone would get them into.</p>

<p>but here’s where I don’t agree: “there is no question that many athletes are accepted while students who are much better qualified are rejected”</p>

<p>“much better qualified are rejected” sounds like you believe that academics should be the only “real” measurement for college admissions. I think colleges have made it very clear over the years that they are looking for well rounded students, students who have sports and/or other EC’s on top of good academics. And for the reasons demonstrated by you and 4 of your roommates, successful and valuable people!</p>

<p>So shouldn’t parents put more energy into helping their kids find non-academic interests and passions, instead of complaining about the parents and kids who did?</p>

<p>my point is, athletes and kids with other EC’s are “better qualified”</p>

<p>“there is no question that many athletes are accepted while students who are much better qualified are rejected.”</p>

<p>You are making an implicit assumption about what it means to be “better qualified.” It is by no means self-evident that “better qualified” simply means having a stronger academic record. In fact, the schools themselves have determined that a person with specific athletic skills plus a certain level of academic achievement is more qualified to attend than some who have a higher level of academic achievement but lack those same athletic skills.</p>

<p>Now, you may disagree with this judgment, but it is theirs to make–not yours. Moreover, so long as everyone is judged by the same standards, there is no inherent unfairness in the system.</p>

<p>The only thing in our life we can control is our attitude. If someone’s snarky and uninformed comments get to you, they win. I know it is VERY hard to control our attitudes, but it really is ours to manage. I try to make choices to not focus on the person who has scratched my surface… there are truly sooo many other issues that need our attention… try not to give these folks any power over your thoughts and your time. They do not deserve it… </p>

<p>at the company I worked for, we had guidelines for how to do business and there was one underlying yardstick that worked for me which is “what is your intent?” I find this question helpful today (1 yr retired) in many aspects of day to day life… and it helps guide me on my own behavior, so that I am not being the jerky person with the snarky comments… not always successful, but I still try… </p>

<p>I find it easier to focus on why I am proud of my kids… not the awards, but the effort, not the successes but the kindnesses… perhaps the easiest way to diffuse this stuff is to respond with “so, tell me about what your child is doing” and give them air time to strut their stuff!! Walk away with a “that was great to hear” and be done with them. Finally, loving Fenway’s “step over it and move IN” … I know she (?) meant move ON… but I think it is more fun to think of moving IN…</p>

<p>^^^^ pach I couldn’t agree more with this post. Here’s a quote from an Ivy likely letter clearly articulating this philosophy of the Ivy/selective LAC admissions decisions concerning athletes and other students with truly exceptional ECs. </p>

<p>“As an accomplished athlete, you have a special skill you are bringing to a community that values it. We think we have built a good athletic ethic at IvyXXXXXX, one based on the belief that athletics can be an important factor in the development of a whole person. As an athlete who has already achieved at a high level, you understand what we mean when we say that. We do not admit only “athletes” to IvyXXXXX any more than we admit “musicians” or “chemists” or “those who have an unusual record of participation in community service.” We admit people of promise. You have shown the capacity to balance your academic life with a serious commitment to sports. We value that in itself and because we know what discipline and commitment it requires.”</p>

<p>EMM1, we cross posted. The LL states the philosophy you are speaking about. It’s their business if they want to choose some smart athletes to enrich the college community.</p>

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<p>The schools have this completely within their control and deserve all the criticism heaped on them about it.</p>

<p>Mod: isn’t Maryland one of those b-ball schools where some of the kids leave after a year or two to go to the NBA or go pro in Europe? some of those drop out stats in basketball are really kids going early for the money, not wanting to risk a career ending injury in college. </p>

<p>but not all of course, at many schools b-ball and football admission standards for top athletes are essentially the NCAA minimum requirement, something like a 2.0 and a 1200 SAT.</p>

<p>riverrunner–on my computer she’s not on the Dyestat signings pages anywhere–not listed under Stanford, not listed under home state of CA, and there’s no photo under her name on the alphabetical pictures page. I’m not saying she’s not going to Stanford, but it’s not up on the 2010 College Choices pages I’m looking at.</p>

<p>fenwaysouth, unfortunately, what your statement implies for me is that my friends are not those known to me but those who I’m only now meeting for the first time. Guess I’ve been keeping my enemies closer.</p>

<p>I also agree that the admittance of athletes with low academics doesn’t do anyone any favors. This practice has impacts all the way down to elementary school.</p>

<p>The GFG, it’s curious that Stanford hasn’t posted anything about Ferrante. On the other hand, I’m not familiar with their usual procedure in similar situations. Would this posting be something they disregard as unimportant?</p>