<p>Yeah, so this is kind of random but I've been thinking about it a lot lately...</p>
<pre><code> I really want to adopt kids when I get older and not have any of my own.
I have many reasons for this - humanitarian, environmental, religious, etc, but to be honest with you a huge reason is because I am female and do not like the idea of going through all the pain and possible complications. I considered having a C-section, but this is really invasive surgery and leaves scars. Maybe I do have a childbirth phobia, maybe I'm a wimp, maybe I'll change my mind when I'm thirty four and married - I don't know. I just really don't see the need to put myself through torture and add more people to the planet when there are tons of needy kids overseas and in the US who need homes.
I just wondered if anyone else felt the same way, or if anyone else wants adoption to be their "first option" if they ever decide to have kids.=D
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<p>I debate it in my mind. I only want to have one child... And I want to carry on my family line... It's a selfish instinct, but I want my <em>own</em> children. But I do want to adopt as well... I toy with the option of having 2 kids. 1 natural (well...C-Section) and one adopted.</p>
<p>Although, I don't like the fact that a C-Section will leave you numb in part of the abdomen. My mom had 3 C-sections (my older brother's and mine were emergency c-sections actually), and she has been numb there ever since the first one. Ah well, I'll give that up for pain (and fear that I'd die in childbirth...small hips, you see). I'll figure it out in 10/15 years...</p>
<p>I want to have one of my own children. To have the experience. But then I want to adopt a few other kids, older kids, the ones that don't have much of a chance of being adopted because everyone wants the babies/little kids.</p>
<p>I want to have two or three of my own and adopt two. I don't want a c-section, hopefully I can have a natural birth..or like on a Baby Story, one of those water births, lol</p>
<p>Yea, i don't really want to go through all of... that. I definitely want kids, but probably not biological. Or maybe surrogate? probably not. Either way, i'm definitely having kids, whether it be adopting or through my partner giving birth.</p>
<p>strangely, though, i think that if really close friends asked me to be their surrogate, i would say yes.</p>
<p>I don't think I could do the surrogate thing..It's just weird going through the whole 9 months thing and then boom! the baby isn't yours.. It would be hard for me to give it up, but that's just me</p>
<p>oh and alamode, my cousin was adopted and when he was little like 5 or 6 my aunt got him a book that was called I'm adopted or whatever..so I guess that made it a little easier, it's so weird though he looks exactly like my uncle like you would never be able to tell that he was adopted.</p>
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I want to have one of my own children. To have the experience. But then I want to adopt a few other kids, older kids, the ones that don't have much of a chance of being adopted because everyone wants the babies/little kids.
<p>I used to feel like you do, but it changed. My conclusion now- you need to consider this first.</p>
<p>You do not know where the child is coming from. On one hand, you could end up with everything you hoped for, but considering many of the families that put up children for adoption (sometimes involved with teen pregnancies, crime, serious financial trouble), some children are not coming from good backgrounds.</p>
<p>I told this to someone, and she would say "It's not about what background the child comes from; it's about how the child is raised." Yet, according to Freakonomics, in similar socioeconomic environments, the average adopted child is less successful (in terms of salary and highest level of education) than the average biological child.</p>
<p>So, an adopted child can and probably will bring you the happiness and fulfillment of a biological child, but you need to first consider the fact that they may not "turn out" as well as your own biological children.</p>
<p>If I have kids, I think I need them to be all adopted or all biological. If there was a mix, I'd always be trying to make it up to the adopted, which would be unfair to my biological kids. I don't relish the idea of going through childbirth either, especially since I have small hips. </p>
<p>Ah well. I'll figure it out when I get there. This is a decision that involves my future husband too.</p>