in my experience, few 18 year olds walk on a campus and think “WOW, I could be inspired to study here” More likely, they are thinking about the recreation opportunities, parties, a cute guy/girl on the tour. Most students spend about 15 hours a week in class. That leaves 153 hours a week for other stuff. Sure some of that is spent studying, sleeping and eating, and for many making money. That all still leaves lots of down time. Most 18 year olds can relate to what they will do in their free time - ski, mountain bike, hang out with their new friends. I’d focus more on those aspects than the classroom experience. My younger son is a freshman at Fort Lewis College in South-Western Colorado - He is in mountain bike heaven but, understands, he can’t stay unless he performs academically (his cycling scholarship has a GPA floor )
It is a beautiful and relatively small school in a really beautiful location. It looks and feels like a private school. It’s a CO public so, certainly affordable. It is certainly worth a trip to Durango. If your son is an outdoors-man at all, he will never want to leave. If that’s not the right fit for your son, trust me there is a corollary out there for him. Maybe it’s a WUE school like Boise State, UNR , Chico State or U of Hawaii… keep looking.
Now is too early to conclude a gap year is the right answer. At this point, he needs open doors in May - one of which may be a gap year. Work with him to apply to a number of schools. Since he doesn’t have a clear path, more applications is probably a better idea than few.
As far as music goes, when I look at music majors, you need to audition to get into those programs. For music composition, they usually want a portfolio of music that the candidate has prepared and also, most music composition majors seem to require lots of classes in performance which he doesn’t really want to do. Those are some reasons why the music major seems difficult.
NCalRent- Thanks for your ideas. My son is different. He does not care, yet, about the cute girls or parties, and feels like the part of the tour in the gym/recreation facilities is a waste of his time. One thing at CSU that he noticed and liked was one of the “pianos around town” that sits outdoors on campus and some pianos are also in the town of Fort Collins and that’s “recreation” for him to be able to sit at a piano.
Has he thought about a business major with the goal of working in that side of music? Music companies, dj businesses, music schools, etc would all need people with business backgrounds as much or more than people with only music.
If not business, maybe he could look in a similar perspective at the music world. In other words, considering careers on the periphery where he would be surrounded by the music he enjoys but not be performing and teaching himself.
The only other visit was Co. School of Mines and majors there are too limited for his liking. Those really are my son’s concerns. He hears so much about people in deep debt from college loans, he doesn’t want that for us or himself. He also is deeply concerned about going in not knowing what he wants to major in.
Is he aware that there are many schools where he doesn’t have to declare a major until the end of his sophomore year? Colleges wouldn’t allow that if it became a hindrance to student’s graduating on time and successfully.
I would turn it around – if he’s in college going to academic advising, signing up for different types of classes, talking to professors, learning what he likes and doesn’t like – that’s making progress towards figuring out a major. Sitting at home he would not have the same opportunities to explore.
A few kids know what they want when they get to campus. A bunch more figure out that they didn’t want what they thought they did once they’re in college level classes. And still others are inspired and find their majors when they take a class that just rocks their world.
There are some majors like music that you have to prepare for before stepping onto campus. There are other majors like engineering where you have to get on track right away or it’s hard to finish in four years. But there are dozens of majors where neither of these are the case.
As far as the money concerns go: are you low income? Is it going to be a strain to send him to college? Or is he concerned because you have not had a frank money talk? Have you researched college funding and financial aid?
Because if it is the case that there isn’t a penny to spare, that is different from addressing general nervousness about attending college.
mom2twogirls- Thanks for the thought of considering working in the music world, but as possibly a writer or engineer or computer science guy (think Sirius radio or whatever)! It may not point him in a particular direction but might ease his mind about not leaving his passion behind.
@dogladyJ What about audio engineering. Would marry his passion for music and his technical capabilities. University of Colorado Denver seems to have it.
AroundHere- For finances: We bring in enough income that we wouldn’t get much or any? financial aid, but we don’t have enough extra funds to pay $60,000 a year for college (tuition, room & board). You do make a good point about sitting down to talk with my son about the finances. It may or may not make him feel better though since nothing is totally predictable about future finances.
Thanks for giving me a different way to think about how being at college next year could be just as helpful or better for figuring out his career direction versus a gap year.
@DogladyJ - Every college is required to have a net price calculator on their website so that you can find out if you would be required to pay a 60,000 full price tag.
In addition, you can google “2017 Forbes guide to financial aid” for an article by Troy Onink about how financial aid works.
While true for lots of majors at lots of colleges, those majors with longer prerequisite sequences do need to be started earlier than the 4th semester in order to graduate on schedule, even if declaring the major can wait until the 4th semester.
Would it help him to realize, as Around Here notes, that the first two years are a time to take different classes and see what clicks? Instead of looking for that fixed answer at 17, he can see this as a time to explore, be open minded about that?
Even with AP in high schools, it’s not the buffet of academic choices that college offers- or the depth and breadth. Often, in hs, these aren’t taught by real subject specialists, folks who devote research time to these fields, etc.
Being good at math isn’t all that would point a kid toward engineering, there’s a sort of mindset about info gathering and problem solving, the ability to see both the big picture and the smaller components, plus collaborative efforts. Maybe he looks at a course catalog, has the moment where he thinks, “Hmm, X and Y might be interesting classes,” in addition to math. It’s often that simple, at first.
College is really more than career prep. It’a a time to open your mind. It’s true some kids have a pre-set idea, but these are often limited- medicine, engineering, research, teacher/prof, journalist, businessman, etc. It’s once in college that they see the fuller range of paths, start to have the Aha moments. Especially the bright ones, who already like academic challenges.
right - I totally agree about the aha moments… perhaps have him focus on what happens if he doesn’t go… it is really unlikely he’ll be able to afford his own place as a musician. How does he envision spending his days and nights if he’s not in school? and how supportive will you be?
I’m not one to sugar-coat, so here’s my 2 cents Tell him that he can’t stay after he graduates. He needs to study something that gets him a job in the adult world, even if it’s not a first choice of career. Sometimes there’s a balance between passion and practicality. Most students change their major 2 or 3 times. Perhaps he’ll find a hot chick and marry her. With the right motivation, he’ll discover himself.
I think the poster who recommended your son look into the business side of Music may be onto something. My son, a business major who loves music (not talented in anyway but just loves it) was taking a Music class as an elective last semester and his professor recommended he consider a Minor in “Music, Media, and Enterprise” since he enjoyed his class so much. Maybe you could look into nearby colleges that offer something similar as a minor or major (if this interests him)?
Tell him that he can’t stay after he graduates. He needs to study something that gets him a job in the adult world, even if it’s not a first choice of career. Sometimes there’s a balance between passion and practicality. Most students change their major 2 or 3 times. Perhaps he’ll find a hot chick and marry her. With the right motivation, he’ll discover himself.