<p>I'm only recovering now from the vestiges of severe childhood bullying coupled with your typical Jewish parents comparing you to children of their friends all the time. I know I'm capable and have gotten A grades in classes and on tough research papers before, but I often get weighed down and worry too much with the enormity of the task at hand of "coming back" to the same level so-called "normal" people are at. I developed some very poor habits that I developed to keep my mind off my hopeless condition and have hindered me in school the last 2 years. My last 4 semesters are all Fs and Ws and the 40 credits worth of Fs have left my GPA at 1.38. I'm back this semester from a years suspension and while I've been attending all the classes, even if I'm a little behind (where before I'd feel too ashamed to come and an anthill of procrastination would develop into an avalanche), and keeping up for the most part, it's still weighing me down. These 4 years I have spent working as a server at a restaurant basically replaced the friends and high school experience I never had as a timid, fearful, teenager. </p>
<p>I can guarantee if I had a time machine, I could easily go back to being 12 years old and fix all this, but that's obviously not gonna happen. As a result of all these mistakes and constantly feeling behind or not measuring up, I developed poor coping habits of procrastination, junk food, and an internet addiction. Those 3 combined have left me with poor time management skills and I often hate myself for not being able to combine having a decent social life with studying. It's been either one or the other for me. I now have a better grip of things (i.e. started exercising damn near every day, knowing how to best navigate working in a corporate environment via some hard-learned lessons from my serving job), but I often get the message that anything I do to change is too little, too late. </p>
<p>I only have 1 more semester after this to graduate and even if I do great, my final GPA will only end up in the 2.4 to 2.5 range. I'm 25 years old and due to those 4 semesters, I've basically spent 6 years in college. Getting into any more unneeded debt or adding another major to up my gpa is foolish at this point. My major is political science. I chose this major because those were the only classes I had any interest in high school in and did great in them. The couple of things I've got going for me is that I've always had steady employment since I was 14 and am an avid reader. </p>
<p>I didn't do any extracurricular in high school and none in college so far. The one time I applied for an internship in our state legislature in the fall 2007 semester, I didn't get it even though they didn't have a GPA requirement or anything on the application. Only now I'm told it was most likely because I applied very late in the process. </p>
<p>I know if I can get over my self-esteem issues, I can be a productive member of society, but I often feel that U.S. society doesn't want to give people like me a second chance. I'm not a shut-in by nature and only eventually became one due to guilt of not measuring up. </p>
<p>I've ruled out going to law school and would have done the same even if I had a 3.85 GPA and 3 internships. </p>
<p>Is it too late for me to start volunteering on campaigns/for the state party in eventual hope of making it a career? </p>
<p>I want to put my past behind me.</p>