Any honest critics willing to read my uc personal statement?

<p>Hi guys, i really need someone to help me out with my statement. Just a simple read and some honest critique, i would prefer someone who has already gone through this process and has a sharp eye. But i will take any help :) but no high school students because i am in high school.</p>

<p>I don't have enough posts to PM so can you please post your emails or PM me your emails?</p>

<p>I promise though it may not be perfect it is definitely not your average cookie cutter boring personal statement so atleast you will have enhanced your mind somewhat by reading it!!! </p>

<p>please and thank you very much</p>