@am9799: And here’s the thing (in STEM, at least): unless you are a math savant or something, the professors at even a college in the 100-200 range (who often got their PhD at one of those top brand-name schools kids try so hard to get in to) are going to be so far above you and other undergrads that if you want to challenged, you can be challenged.
I don’t think that many HS kids understand that undergraduate math (and this is true for many other fields as well) even at “the #1 math department in the country” is peanuts compared to the PhD education those profs at schools #100-#200 went through (even though undergrad would already be a big step up from HS).
@citymama9: Yeah, there really is no reason to stress in the US (unlike some countries where a test at 17 determines the path of the rest of your life). In the US, there are many paths to a great education and success. And even if you really really want an “Ivy League education”, there are many pathways to that where you can earn your way in and the process seems much less capricious.
Certain contract colleges in Cornell have transfer agreements with various NYS publics and CCs where it seems like you mostly just have to get a high GPA to get in.
Columbia and WashU have 3-2 agreements with LACs for engineering where you have to maintain a 3.2 or so and meet other requirements.
If you take a year or more off from school, Columbia SGS is for non-trads and while not easy to get in to, it doesn’t seem as insanely difficult and capricious as the process out of HS.
And finally, Harvard Extension School is for working adults if your kid, for whatever reason, did not get a degree by then. It’s not the traditional undergrad experience, but with many Harvard faculty teaching, I’d say you still would get a Harvard education (there are many other extension schools and the like as well, but unlike most of them, HES actually has Harvard faculty teaching many/most of the HES classes).
Oh wait, there’s also Penn LPS. Also for adults, though you may take daytime classes. Though it seems like it is limited to liberal arts majors.
Yes! I have a high school junior. What is most frightening is the waitlisting of high stats kids who “demonstrated interest” from schools that accept 30-50% of applicants where my kid would be in the top 25% by SAT and GPA.
We made sure that he is touring a mix of schools. But one that we are so excited he loved-- because it looked like a “likely” for him-- offered their honors program to some kids with stats like his while waitlisting many others.
While I do not mean to disparage lower stats kids who got in-- I am sure they were strong candidates and deserved admission and I hate when people assume their child should have gotten in and someone else should not have-- yield management is a nightmare.
How do you know what’s a “likely” anymore? A kid might apply to schools at a range of selectivity levels and think he has done due diligence in finding reaches, matches and likelies/ safeties he would love to attend… where he would be happy at any of them… and then be rejected or waitlisted by all of them!
@TheGreyKing, but if a kid is waitlisted from a school he should have a very good chance for and then says they would go if taken off the waitlist, I’d expect them to be taken of the WL, most likely.
@carolinamom2boys
I don’t think so. My son last year was waitlisted in a school that was a reach for him because of his low gpa. I assume most of the kids in the waiting list had a lot higher stats than him.
Also once your kid is in college, you will just be happy if they make it through…not so much what college they are at. You will have friends who kids overreached and can’t make it through…or kids who turn out to have undiagnosed mental health issues, or who thought that college far way was the best but it turned out not to be, or their kids didn’t go to college because they didn’t know what they wanted to do.
I have a D19 and yes, I have gotten discouraged reading here sometimes. She is amazing (to me!) with average grades and a PSAT that was sadly not so hot. I started re-thinking options with her stats and I am going to strongly suggest PSAT prep over this summer. Now I worry our state school (MD) is out of reach for her and I didn’t even like that school. Time will tell how this shakes out but I have been adjusting her expectations and my own - a real eye opener for sure.
@Cotton2017 Hi! I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t worry about PSAT prep if you’re not aiming to be a Nat’l Merit Finalist. Maybe it’s better to focus on SAT and/or ACT prep. I can relate so much about adjusting expectations. I got lots of good feedback on this thread that you might find helpful. Hang in there!
Regarding waitlists. Many of the kids coming off waitlists are going to be full pay students, as the money for financial aid has been used up already. My son was recently waitlisted by 2 schools he really liked and I doubt he’d get into either one of them, based off their recent waitlist stats. He chose another school, put down his deposit and decided to move on, no regrets.
It’s not a new book but Loren Pope’s Looking Beyond the Ivy League is a great antidote for the stress of thinking about getting into an elite school (or not). Pope’s argument is that more selectivity equals less education. Even if you have a hard time internalizing that argument, it might help to keep in mind that the meaning of elite in higher education has definitely changed over the years and it’s likely to change again. When I was younger, if you met a guy who went to Amherst, you suspected his parents were rich, connected, and probably a little conservative. It had very little to do with that guy being sufficiently intelligent (or something) to come out on top of a worldwide beauty competition. Competitions are fun and people get obsessive about them. But competitions are not the point and, at least within our own families, we should do whatever we can do to keep them from becoming the point.