<p>gthopeful-
Being a Florida resident and prospective Gator, I'm surprised to hear your anecdotes about UF. What incredibly unprofessional behavior on behalf of your doctor- after you trusted him and put your health in his hands, he has the gall to say that he hated UF guys when he was in college? Seriously? USF is a perfectly respectable school. Talk about a REALLY awkward situation.</p>
<p>Yes, well, not that I have anything at stake here, but I'm speaking about the Bay Area in which "I" grew up--that would be circa 1965-75. I'm sure there are some changes of which I am unaware, but it's appropriate to understand that Stanford has not always been the crown of California higher education. What has happened to the public school system in that state is in many ways regrettable, but my point, I guess, is really more focused on the transient nature of greatness and the silliness of people who measure themselves according to that whimsical standard.</p>
<p>I usually just mention the safety schools I have gotten into and express how excited I am to have been accepted--its a relatively genuine, non-condescending way to prevent myself from sounding too pretentious I guess</p>
<p>
[quote]
gthopeful-
Being a Florida resident and prospective Gator, I'm surprised to hear your anecdotes about UF. What incredibly unprofessional behavior on behalf of your doctor- after you trusted him and put your health in his hands, he has the gall to say that he hated UF guys when he was in college? Seriously? USF is a perfectly respectable school. Talk about a REALLY awkward situation.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Yes I was definitely taken aback by his egregious statement. It's ironic too because USF has a well-regarded med school in the area. Having mostly close friends that went off to OOS privates and dreamt of working in nonprofits in [insert poor area of the world] before starting their political careers, it's easy to forget that the state schools are the ones most people went to and the issue of U Florida in Florida is quite polarizing. On one hand, I'll get the gator chomp from 10 year olds whose parents live and breathe U Florida, but then others will completely lay into you because they went to FSU (actually I'm kidding; all the FSU alums I've met have been nice, friendly people).</p>
<p>You guys must be awkward or something, because I've got friends that are applying to ivies (nothing I'd ever have even the slightest dream of a chance at) and I'm not taken aback when they tell me that. Just because someone's going to an ivy or applying to high tier schools doesn't make them better than anybody else - everybody's got their own path in life, you know? Some people really are best off at a state school, or a community college, or not going to college at all - there's no single best "Private school, ivy league, become lawyer" path that's the greatest achievement in life.</p>
<p>Of course, if you really can't handle the conversation, you can just lie and say whatever less selective schools you know of.</p>
<p>It's kinda like karma though..they wanted to brag, they got shut down.</p>
<p>
[quote]
...I tend to say something vague like "in the Boston area"...
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Some people interpret that, though. A friend of mine (MIT alum) once used this exact phrase only to have someone tell him that he sounded "like some rich Harvard [epithet]".</p>
<p>OP, if you really want to avoid this situation, I'd try a vague answer combined with a slight digression. "Oh, lots of places...what I really want is a good biology program and lots of summer internship opportunities. Tell me, what attracted Billy to Northeastern? I've heard great things about its co-op program!" If they corner you into giving the specifics after that...nobody can say that you didn't try.</p>
<p>Alternatively, while I sympathize with the desire not to make people feel bad, I don't think there's anything wrong with just answering the question they asked (while not acting like you are better than their kid, demeaning their schools, acting like you think you deserve their praise for your list, etc), and then following up your answer with genuine-seeming interest in or praise for the features of one or more of their schools (not strictly necessary, IMO, but a nice touch). They wanted to brag, they tried it on the wrong person.</p>
<p>"So a friend's parent, or a family friend who has kids you know your age starts talking to you about colleges and stuff. They start talking about their own kid who's applying to colleges too. So the conversation goes like this:</p>
<p>Person: yeah, my kid's applying to some pretty good schools, hard to get into. Really likes SUNY Binghamton, and Stonybrook. Rutgers and Northeastern are up there too. Where are you applying?
you: Insert list of ivies and other top 15 schools.
Person: Oh...good for you.</p>
<p>It wouldn't be so awkward except for the fact the person seems so excited about their own kid's aspirations and then they make that face that gives the impression that they're now a bit upset because you "overshadowed" their kid in a way. And you can tell that one of the reasons they started up their conversation with you in the first place is so that they can brag (it's a parent thing). This has happened to me, and then you're kind of stuck there in a weird awkward silence or whatever because neither of you know how to further the conversation.</p>
<p>So yeah, any similar experiences?"</p>
<p>It's fine to say you go to any ivy or other top school but if your still in the process of applying, I don't think it would be a good idea to say you applied to all of the top schools in this specific conversation. If the parent wants to brag, I'd just let them have their moment to be proud of their kid. On the other hand, if you and a peer were talking about colleges, its fine to say everywhere you applied to.</p>
<p>I don't tell people that I applied to top schools and I'll admit that I do get a little annoyed when one of my friends always replies "Oh, I think I'll go to Harvard, Princeton, or Yale." They are reaches for most and I know I wouldn't want to say that and later denied from them in April. I usually just say I'm going to the State Flagship or Penn (because they confuse it with Penn State anyway). If I end up going somewhere else that's great but its all up in the air for now.</p>
<p>How do you know the other person isn't thinking, "Pretty high hopes there! I hope you have applied to some safeties."? And when they wish you luck, maybe they really mean it.</p>
<p>Yeah, DreamingOutLoud conveyed the point I was trying to make. Not only do I not want to have to deal with humiliation later (like "oh I'm GOING to Harvard"), but honestly I don't really want to talk about it at all. I don't want to talk about out of state schools- heck, I don't even really want to talk about in state schools! My applications are complete, my essays are done, my recs are sent, and there's nothing really to say. </p>
<p>"oh, have you visited?" no.
"what do you like about the school?" idk. the programs.
"will you go if you get in?" i'll have to see what they offer.
"oh you think you'll get a scholarship?" idk. </p>
<p>Hahaha. You can see that I am a shy person. For me it's just awkward and it just gets out of hand. Better to just say "I got into FSU and I am still waiting to hear from UF." That is the truth but I have obviously omitted several schools from the list, haha. </p>
<p>To each his own! I'm not attacking the people who are social and are comfortable chatting about college applications, and don't really see the need for those people to say that I'm "awkward" or "weird" because I'm not comfortable sharing where I applied with everyone who asks. </p>
<p>My parents don't really socialize with many other parents so they don't run into those other types of situations discussed on this board. I think that if asked, they would say the same thing I said (because they know that I'm keeping the information private). I don't think that there's anything wrong with saying, "Susie doesn't like for me to say, but she did get accepted to flagship1/flagship2 already!"</p>
<p>The problem I've been having since the beginning of junior year isn't people asking where I'm applying, but where I'm GOING to college. I was constantly asked this all throughout my junor year (by people who knew I was only 16 or that I was a junior). I know they weren't thinking about it and meant no harm, but how was I supposed to answer? So I used the one-size-fits-all teenage answer: "Oh, I don't know yet."</p>
<p>Of course, now that I'm a senior who was accepted ED and could actually tell them, no one asks anymore. :/</p>
<p>haha me too! People constantly ask that too. When I say "idk" they are like "oh.." like I'm a dropout risk or something.</p>
<p>oh wow...that is awkward...made me cringe just reading that conversation</p>
<p>YES!
It's very awkward, but it is kind of amusing :P</p>
<p>hahaha i don't worry b/c where i'm from no one knows about my school anyway and always mixes it up with another one. and on top of that the college i'm going to isn't that great either so it's all good lol.</p>
<p>Maybe you're underestimating your friends. It's not always a competition, you know. People can be simultaneously genuinely happy that they got into Backwater Safety U and you got into Harvard.</p>
<p>I don't know, that sometimes happens to me. Usually though my classmates are happy that I (and many of my other friends) are applying to top schools. And I'm equally happy if they get into their local state dream schools.</p>
<p>
[quote]
Maybe you're underestimating your friends. It's not always a competition, you know. People can be simultaneously genuinely happy that they got into Backwater Safety U and you got into Harvard.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Yes, it's easier to be happy for both if they were obviously aiming for different-level colleges, but if they had a pretty similar college preferences list then it's quite hard for a friend who got into #5 on the list to feel happy for someone who got into their top choice.</p>