Anyone’s kid ever transfer from music school (or any good transfer experiences in general)

Parents Forum
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Originally he wanted a music school within a large university (like USC or U Miami U Mich) because he wanted to take some academic courses or double major, but then got a huge scholarship at a stand-alone music school that seemed a great fit. It made financial sense but he was also very excited because he could design his program with performance and music production, etc.

First year was remote from his bedroom, it kind of sucked but he made Deans list and it was a better experience than expected.

Second year first semester was very rocky due to too many credits, getting sick etc. He’s talking about wanting to transfer to a U or college and do music either as extracurricular or dual major. And this is a kid who was super gung ho and convinced music was his calling. And talented enough to get almost a full ride.

He’s had iffy mental health through the pandemic. I don’t want to tell him he has to stay, but finances are limited and kid #4 is getting her acceptances now and we figured we could pay a little more for her college since music school kid was set. From what I know, there is no merit for transfers so I can only see the state flagship as an option, but not sure he wants to go there, not even sure he knows what he wants to study.

We are kind of floored by this turn of events. Of course we won’t tell him he has to stay, but wondering if anyone else’s kid transferred from
music school and/or maybe most has a good transfer story to tell?

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This is a tough one! Music has been more affected by COVID than many other areas of study. I wonder if that is a factor. Getting sick in first semester of sophomore year can’t help. Has he been focusing more on performance or production, or equally? Does his music school belong to a consortium of colleges with other types of classes? is it a small conservatory?

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This is what concerns me about our 17 year olds having to make lifelong career decisions. Many just don’t know at that age what they want to do for the rest of their lives. I’m sorry you’re in this predicament, but hopefully my comment adds some perspective. How could he have known?

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@compmom i tried to DM you but looks like you don’t accept them?

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PM’ing you

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I just don’t feel our 17 year olds do have to make decisions about their “lifelong” career. For instance, a music major grad does not have to continue in music. I still hold on to the idea that college major and post-grad job don’t have to match and that young people should be able to study what they are really interested in, and still get a good job that may not be directly tied to that interest. I realize things are changing and I understand the cost of college, the debt burden and the need for “ROI” but who is putting pressure on our kids to know what they plan to do for the rest of their lives?

In the context of this thread, there may be many things going on. I know many doctorate grads who are questioning their paths because of COVID. Undergrads like the OP’s son are experiencing unique stresses on mental health and motivation due to COVID. The transition out of home has been affected. Money worries have increased for many during the pandemic.

How can a young person maintain interest in a “calling” when for a whole year he is stuck at home and not able to play with others? He may have a digital audio work station and may play on his own, but isolation can really affect motivation.

That said, if, for instance, he has been doing a lot of reading and has developed a new “passion” for history, that is a different scenario. A conservatory might feel limiting. And it seems this young man had wide interests in the liberal arts in the first place.

BM programs are intense. I wonder how many kids who love music, do not expect the intensity. When the intensity of classes is not matched by the pleasure of performing, due to COVID, that “calling” would certainly be dimmed.

I am really not sure what I would do as a parent @raincat. I admire you for saying that you won’t say no, but the financial end of things is challenging. It would be good to try to assess if this lost motivation for music as a focus is COVID-related and will improve, or if it is more of a natural gravitation to the idea of broader choices in areas of study.

Therapy and maybe medication might clarify things by taking the depression out of the equation to some extent.

I do wonder if he can stay but somehow arrange for classes in liberal arts at a nearby college, with the conservatory accepting the credits. NEC does this with Northeastern.

Sympathies! ps Was he sick with COVID? Mono? Did he have accommodations for the illness?

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I hear you. My D20 started as BM performance, is now BA Music and still unhappy, but feels stuck/helpless to switch since she will pretty much have to start over to have enough credits in another major to graduate. I don’t know what she’ll do. The entire music department seems really deflated, it’s just a sad situation all around. She is considering transferring to state U as well.

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Music has been severely impacted by COVID. Along with theater and dance. Music probably impacted more than any other area, especially wind and brass and voice.

If a student is truly unhappy, there are schools that accept 75-90 credits and have major programs of 10 classes that can often be taken online to complete a degree.

However, music departments are coming alive again and the “deflation” may improve. And if enrolled for a BA, can your daughter take gen eds and electives that help her happiness, maybe a minor or a double major?

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Interesting, I did not know that about online programs.

The further along she gets, the harder it is to put on the brakes. And as unhappy as she is, she just doesn’t haven’t the guts to step out of the whole thing. Her major ensemble director is taking a sabbatical next semester, so maybe that will improve everyone’s morale. And nthat she is finishing up with theory and aural skills she will hopefully have more time in her schedule as well.

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PM’ing you

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I think it’s pretty normal for a student to have doubts as they get deeper into their course of study and begin to see the realities of what they’ve chosen rather than the glamorized version they tend to have earlier on… At a specialized school with just a few options it’s more of a risk as far as what changing your mind means. We had a conversation about this with our oldest who attended a university with “tech” in the name. What if you change your mind about engineering? What would the backup plan be as far as getting a degree?

We have told all our kids (they all went OOS for college) that the backup plan is the local state university. You can come home, live at home, get a degree, and we will support you, but we can’t afford to give you tons of options for the backup plan if you don’t like where you are/lose a scholarship/otherwise need to make a change. No fault, no judgement, just the reality of our budget for college.

Our son is in music school OOS. He’s definitely had some doubts along the way. Mental health has been a challenge for him as well. He has opted to continue where he is. We would support him if he need or wanted to drop out or transfer, but he knows that he would be finding a job or transferring to the local state U if he wants or needs to come home, regardless of the reason. He’s opted to stay and finish. It has been helpful that he knows what the backup plan is, and that it exists, as he struggles through all that it means to pursue a career in music, to have normal college student doubts and frustrations, and to deal with the crazy world we’ve had for the last couple of years.

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Music is an intense major, with music history, theory and musicianship requirements that can seem onerous for some, including those who play and compose.

And COVID has taken away the really enjoyable parts of music- performance, playing with others, hearing others- so it has been demoralizing for sure.

Things are starting to come back again and this time let’s hope it is sustainable. But it is very understandable that young students might lose some motivation and hope in music over the short term. Long term I think they will be fine.

And again, music majors can do all kinds of things once graduated.

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Interesting. If you would be willing to post a few names of these places, I think this would be an incredible resource. Knowing there is a “Plan B” is such a comfort, even if you don’t end up using it.

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In addition to my comment on schools that take 90 creditsL there are other schools that take 64-65 transfer credits. Smith, Wellesley, BU…many others. Smith and Wellesley have special programs for those who want to finish.

I would check online programs at schools and/or online or in-person continuing education, degree completion or adult learner programs. The ones my family deals with are UMass and Lesley.

It depends on the number of credits you have, obviously, and also whether a school offers an entire 10 class major online (see Lesley’s online psychology or UMass Lowell online for examples).

There are also low residency programs like Goddard and Union Institute.

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Chiming in to say, don’t limit his in-state options to the state flagship. It may be that he wants to avoid a 20K+ size school and go somewhere smaller. He might prefer one of the other in-state public options over the flagship. Or it may be easier to get a good experience in his new major at a school other than the flagship.

Figure out what the family’s budget is for his transfer location, inform him, and he’ll be able to do some of the search work himself.

Good luck.

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Thanks everyone. We have a HS senior entering college also, and we were discussing her options based on what the COA was for our music student. So this has thrown a wrench in more than his plans.

Our flagship is a highly respected school
so we are lucky in that regard. And he does have other state schools choices but given what I know about him I don’t see him choosing any over our flagship.

We’ve had a little time to think about this and there may be other things going on. Thinking of visiting him (a flight cross country) to talk in person before any decision is made. His life was music so we’re really surprised. But not unsupportive if this is what he wants/needs.

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Flying out seems like a good idea :slight_smile: I kind of hope he stays in music. There are many options within music, and perhaps he can take courses at a nearby college for credit.

I am reading and hearing of others who want to leave music and I blame COVID. Also once he slogs through all the required theory and musician ship and can explore interests, he might be happier.

I hope he is healthy again! Good luck on your trip.