@dbandmom- Thank you! It will be fine. We know things happen for a reason. He was actually happy and wants the time to practice and grow. He went in fighting for more money and showing how much he wanted it. However, in the end, he also did not want that much debt so early on. On paper, our EFC looks great but we are not ready to dig deep into mortgage and retirement to cover college nor take huge Parent Plus Loans. He has great mentors who shared their concern about debt so he is taking their advice as well as ours. Like his mentors say. It is about the music and what you put into it, not the school.
@musicdm I think it’s a little different for pop / rock / jazz (maybe?) I still remember the day when I first talked college with my D’s voice teacher. His eyes kind of glazed over and he said something like “Why isn’t she just going to go out and get to work?” I said “Well, we really want her to get a degree.” and he said “In music?” lol
Certainly these types of college programs are starting to get more popular but honestly, you can study with really great teachers without being in college. My D’s last teacher has had many singers on the Voice or American Idol (he offered the same opportunity for my D, but she wasn’t interested) and he teaches many actors that have roles on TV, movies and Broadway. My D took a single lesson by Skype with someone who coaches famous mainstream pop/rock artists. He was willing to take her as a student, but the cost was very high. We momentarily considered community college and continuing with him.
I like to say once the talent is there, it’s who you know and a whole lot of hustle…
@musicdm Last year, we went into this process with eyes wide open. In fact, we spent most of Feb/Mar agonizing over how crazy competitive and pricey each program was and doing our best to come to terms with the likelihood of either his not getting in or getting in but not being able to afford to go. The thing is, he didn’t want to compromise in programs—he very much knew what he wanted as well as what he didn’t want, and there were only a handful that met the criteria. “Safeties” (financial or otherwise) just didn’t appeal to him.
He was fortunate enough to be able to go in the end, but had things not worked out that way, we’d have been right where you are. While I imagine it’s painful to readjust your sails, I truly think I would have been contented and felt confident that we’d be fine, just as you know you guys will be. Imagine the possibilities of this coming year! My son’s plan was to work/save, hone his craft with a mentor, and create as many opportunities as possible before “wowing" ‘em even more next time.
I’m so glad you and yours are already feeling solid and happy about a very wise and well-reasoned decision. And hopefully enough time will have passed and you’ll have enough seasoned experience and know-how before applying again that the whole process will be far less intimidating and stressful next year!
@musicdm - If there is a community college nearby, that could be your emergency backup plan? Some colleges will allow you to transfer all credits, others will take some, and still others will not take any. I would check with your target schools for next year and see what the case is for those. DS took 27 dual-enrollment credits in high school and it turns out all of them will be accepted by his college.
@2KansasKids Yes I think we are covered. He has heard that most conservatories do not transfer credits or are very stingy in that area. He will take the ones he needs as part of his plan for the year. We are also looking into summer programs and ideas that will keep him focused and connected.
Just be aware that if he takes college credits anywhere, he will be considered a transfer student. Transfers don’t get the $$ that brand new freshman get. Not even close. Please research this for yourself. A mistake could cost you a small fortune. You may decide to keep it a true GAP
@musicdm I’m sorry that your situation has not been ideal. I do believe that the short-term pain of adjusting expectations (which you seem to be doing already) is much more manageable than the long-term pain of debt.
Nothing said below is meant to indicate that you did not take the right steps. You did…and there are just some kids as @YertleTurtle indicates where the safeties etc don’t work. I do want you to know, however, that my kid did not attend her INITIAL dream school. I let her know that her dream school was not going to become my financial nightmare! Luckily, while looking at affordable alternatives, she really did find a lot of great choices. In the end she never applied to her dream school. So my only suggestion is to let him dig deep into a few schools that may be more affordable and/or generous. And it is great that he has some professional musicians to bounce ideas off. They are usually very savvy about debt and the realities of a music career. It sounds like they are already playing a role in helping him understand that there are many paths to a music career.
I also do want to add that for certain art forms (MT and Theater which I’m more familiar with) you do not NEED a college degree as you point out. When looking at MT schools, this was often pointed out…so the question was…WHY do you want a college degree. Maybe a good thing for your son to continue to mull over during his gap year. What does he really want from college and what does he want to pay for it. He could move to a city and do a lower cost school…and just start gigging.
In our case, I wanted my D to have a bachelor’s degree for 2 reasons (and I had a set amt in my head what that should cost). I wanted her to do the high level academic work required to earn a bachelor’s degree (and that includes all the exploration, critical thinking skills, study abroad etc). She wanted it too (but not all kids do…some just want to start making music). And, yes, it was a Plan B…if music didn’t work or she changed her mind…she would have a Bachelor’s degree which could open doors to other careers or graduate programs.
Good luck next year. It will still be an exciting time for him as it sounds like his music journey will continue.
The New School, D’s final choice, came through with an additional 4K last night bringing her appeal amount to 10K in total! We are paying the deposit today and committing! SO thrilled it worked out!! FYI, we appealed the appeal to get the additional money. D spoke with a vocalist there that said she appealed 3 times to get more so it does work. 