<p>"yea, but a major problem is when the parents believe that the only way to achieve happiness and success is by attending HYP. (and no my parents do not believe that)." </p>
<p>This is the problem...Shades, hpa, and I seem to all be on the same wavelength.</p>
<p>^ totally agree.
I can relate to the OP somewhat, as my mom is chinese.
I think it's really hard for people who don't have "typical" asian parents to relate to the pressure of the expectations set forth (when the parent is more concerned about bragging rights than the child's future). The thing that's been so difficult with my mom is her set of expectations-- she expects a 4.0, and I'll meet that expectation, but then she'll also demand that I work throughout the school year even while playing a varsity sport. During school, I'd have 5+ hours of homework a night, but according to my mom, I'm lazy because I don't manage my time well enough to do chores. I'm dreading telling my mom that I got a 33 on the latest ACT, because it's one point less than my cousin's score. It's just sad to me that when I don't meet my mom's expectations, she's disappointed, and when I do, she doesn't acknowledge it. Plus, her dissatisfaction with my scores or whatever causes me to be unhappy about them too-- I know I shouldn't let this happen, but I can't help it. My mom strays a little from the "typical" asian parent because she doesn't want me to go to Harvard. In fact, she says I shouldn't apply to Yale because I'll get rejected, and she won't pay for anything but the state universtiy.</p>
<p>My mother is the complete opposite. She's one of those parents who doesn't care how I do as long as I "tried my best."</p>
<p>My parents don't force me to go to Harvard, and they'll be perfectly fine if I got to UF and become a Gator. Plus, it's getting more competitive each year and its moving up the ranks.</p>