Bad College Mascots

Trinity in Connecticut has the bantam - a generic name for miniature breeds of chicken.

What about Oberlin’s albino squirrel?

13 - @dfbdfb

My 8th-grade English teacher swore by Chesapeake Bay Retrievers - he referred to them as “Chessies”. Cool memory.

I see some mascots are getting grief and getting gone. The Lord Jeff’s of Amherst, the Fighting Sioux of North Dakota, and I imagine there are others. Does that mean they are bad college mascots?

Based on the mascot names it seems the art schools don’t take their teams seriously (since I doubt they do well)…

More “oh what could have been”. Nod to @moooop back at 35:

Detroit Autos
Austin Peay Soups
Williams Sonomas
Reed Instruments
Penn Tellers
Colby Cheese
Wesleyan Churches
Colgate Palmolives
Bard Shakespeares

Furman University’s mascot is a Pallidin( a knight) that in and of itself is not bad, but it’s original mascot was the Furman University Christian Knights( the abbreviation was poorly received at a religious affiliated university)

Susquehanna just changed its mascot from the Crusaders to the River Hawks. Apparently, the crusade had to do with sports rather than Christians, but I guess they figured it was a good idea to change, anyway.

Local high school: Hickman High School Kewpies

It’s a baby

Always loved the Cornhuskers. It just seems so … honest.

And there’s the St John’s College Platypi. That’s up there with Evergreen Geoduck and Santa Cruz Banana Slug for world’s coolest mascot.

Fantasy Contests:

Drexel Dragons vs Carleton Knights

Antioch Radicals vs U of Hawaii Rainbow Warriors

Earlham Quakers vs Elon Fighting Christians (OK, the Fighting Christians were renamed, so I’ll make it Quakers vs. Whittier Poets Are we scared yet? Followup match with the terrifying, intimidating NYU Violets.)

William and Mary Tribe vs Lewis and Clark Pioneers (Why micro-agress when you can go for the whole macro?)

St Olaf Oles vs U Akron Zips (The names thought up by the tiredest committees ever. They just wanted to be done and go home.)

SCAD Bees vs Muhlenberg Mules (Watch 'em kick)

Whitman Missionaries vs Kinki Devils of Kinki University, Japan

Lewis and Clark Bars

Stanford Mustangs

Loyola Opposition

Georgetown. Houses

Puget Sound Effects

Holy Cross Purposes

Lawrence Tailors

Carlton Doormen

Dickinson. Rises

St. John’s Worts

LOL, at first I thought you meant “Georgetown Houses” because, well, there’s very little that’s more intimidating than the cost of housing in Georgetown …

Pomona Lisas

Harvey Mudd Puddles

Wake Forest Roosters

A real one: East Carolina Pirates battle the Navy and lose.

http://espn.go.com/college-football/game?gameId=400764866

Of course, you could have cat fights between Auburn, LSU, Clemson, Princeton, and others (all Tigers).

Drake University missed their chance—they’re the Bulldogs, but they could have been the Dragons (it even alliterates!) or, if they wanted to be properly redundant, they could have been the Drake Drakes.

Or, now, perhaps the Drake Rappers.

Scottsdale Community College Fighting Artichokes…go chokes???

Or the Drake Ducks.

And Williams has the Ephs?!?

Williams is apparently in the same league as Tufts U and Wesleyan U, so, well, the contest between “Ephs” and “U” brings up interesting possibilities for competing chants.

The “we have the same mascot; there can be only ONE!” and other fun matchups:

Penn Quakers vs. Earlham Quakers

  • Pacifists abound, so nobody scores. Tie.

Georgia Bulldogs vs. Mississippi State Bulldogs /and/ LSU Tigers vs. Auburn Tigers

  • Ya gotta hand it to the SEC: they sure are creative.

…and the winner of that latter matchup takes on the Clemson Tigers.

There are just too many Wildcats and Aggies – maybe some of the former should call themselves “Lynx” or “Pumas” instead and some of the latter could change it to “Tech Boomers” or “Engineers” or “Farmers” or “Mechanics”.

Troy Trojans vs. USC Trojans

  • And the new late-night ad campaign is born.

Marshall Thundering Herd vs. Colorado Buffaloes
–> Winner takes on the North Dakota State Bison

Belmont Bruins vs. UCLA Bruins

Colors:

Stanford Cardinal vs. Harvard Crimson

Dartmouth Big Green vs. North Texas Mean Green
–> Winner takes on the Tulane Green Wave

California Golden Bears vs. Minnesota Golden Gophers

Cornell Big Red vs. St. John’s Red Storm

Tulsa Golden Hurricane vs. The U!

Speaking of the Golden Hurricane:

I imagine it’s what a bush or a tree fears when it sees a person walking a bunch of territorial/dominant dogs, and they are headed its way…

Would Clemson have to play Princeton in its Tiger quarterfinal?

Similarly, the other Bulldog quarterfinal would be CSU Fresno versus Yale.

Georgia Tech versus CSU Sacramento would pit two types of stinging insects against each other (Yellowjackets and Hornets).

Nebraska versus Wichita State would be a contest between corn (Cornhuskers) and wheat (Shockers).

^Yep!

I used to think the Wichita State Shocker was an electrical charge, a person or thing delivering it, or maybe a utility worker. hehe