Bad Roomate

<p>I am a current freshman and live in Mangum (north campus). I hate my roommate and it has gotten progressively worse. He decided on his own to set a 1 am curfew which is so stupid. I have been staying up until 3/4 am typing on my laptop without creating noise and all this while having no lights on. He says that he can't sleep with my laptop on and brought in the RA to solve the situation. We are having a talk in a few days.
I would have sympathy for my roommate's sleep needs but his earliest class is at 11 while mine is at 9. Apparently 9.5 hours of sleep per night is mandatory for him.
We both want to get new roommate's but neither of us want to move out because of the great location.
Any suggestions on how I can win this battle w/o having to go to sleep at 1am on weekdays. While in the roommate contract we didn't say anything about sleeping we did discuss how the room needs to stay fairly clean which is not happening. He leaves leftovers sitting out and just is a mess in general.</p>

<p>Basically all in all I want to study in my room at 3 am, but the ra suggested I study in the lounge. Anything that a dorm room offers that a lounge doesn't? I will not lose to an idiot liberal in pre-calculus.</p>

<p>Eflo, if you are not turning on lights, keeping volume off on the computer---seems that you are being pretty considerate. </p>

<p>One advantage of the room over the lounge is that there are no other distractions in the room---in the lounge you probably have people coming by, stopping to talk, groups meetings for study, etc.</p>

<p>Is your room situated so that you can somehow "block" off your bed from the roommate's view?</p>

<p>I would think that entering the room at 3am (after studying in lounge), getting ready for bed, then would be more disruptive to his sleep than you studying in room and not going in and out?</p>

<p>I was going to write a response to help you out, and then I read the sentence, "I will not lose to an idiot liberal in pre-calculus."</p>

<p>I'm not familiar with the Mangum room layout but if lofting beds is an option, you can both loft the beds putting your desk and chest of drawers under the bed. By doing this when he is in his lofted bed your bed will block a lot of the light that otherwise would have filled the room. You can also buy rope lights at Target that you can put under your bed to provide ambient light for coming and going while not filling the room with light. My S and his roommate did both of the things I mentioned when they were in a dorm and it worked pretty well.</p>

<p>Colored light (like a red bulb) allows enough light to see to navigate a room yet will allow someone to sleep. It's an old solution....I used it myself in my dorm room. We put a red bulb in the switched light socket and were then able to come home late, see well enough to do whatever we needed to do and not wake up the other person.</p>

<p>I think he is being a bit unreasonable with a hard and fast 1AM curfew but you also need to remember that the pecking of laptop keys can be irritating especially if someone is trying to sleep.</p>

<p>Try to put away the anger ("I hate my roommate") and work out some solution at least until mid year. Many things change after the first semester including people moving out etc.</p>

<p>I also agree with cloying...curb the vitriol...it won't get you anywhere, and won't get you any sympathy either.</p>

<p>Did you and your roommate enter into a roommate agreement covering issues like this? If so and you ahve upheld your end then the other guy has to move.</p>

<p>If you did not cover this then they have sort of a mediation.</p>

<p>One thing my D did was set up her space under her lofted bed, buy a flat sheet and make a curtain to cover her under bed space at night when she was working. (safety pin to springs or velcro to bed frame (Her roommate insisted on lights out at 11:00 pm.) It also became her sanctuary.</p>

<p>If you dont' want to move then don't offer, establish how reasonable you are being and they are likely to rule in your favor. </p>

<p>I understand that once someone gets under your skin, every little thing they do can drive you batty.....but your efforts are better spent to allow him to go batty and you stay calm. Good luck. Roommate issues are the toughest things to deal with...</p>

<p>Can I take his spot? Please? I'd kill to go to UNC so consider yourself lucky to be there to begin with.</p>

<p>in the roommate contract we had nothing about a curfew, but we did say the room had to remain fairly clean. today i moved everything to my side of the room including my tv. neither of us want to move out and i don't think the compromise will work because we are very different. my solution is just to never talk to him, but that will never work</p>

<p>I'll offer a slightly different perspective. Some people are incredibly light sleepers and often fail to get decent REM sleep because they are so easily awakened. It doesn't matter if you spend 10 hours in the bed 'trying' to sleep, it will feel like 3 if it isn't quality sleep. I know...I'm one of these people ;). </p>

<p>I think being awake at 3 or 4 a.m. studying probably creates more noise and more distraction than you think. I would agree the lounge is the appropriate place for that. But if you absolutely refuse 'to lose', you might create a visual shield as other posters have suggested and you might ask your roommie how he feels about a fan or something to create white noise in the room.</p>

<p>I also suspect, since you state you are both 'very different', there is more to the problem than just the incompatible study times. Bottom line, if neither of you is willing to put the other person's feelings above your own, then you get what you get...a bad roommate situation which is likely to repeat itself even if after a move. </p>

<p>I CAN sympathize though. My d had an extremely bad experience last year and she just about killed herself trying to accommodate a truly unreasonable and emotional roommate. (Finally, the girl called ME and said she would move if I bought something for her. Can't give details or it will reveal identities....but my husband said 'pay the ransom so she'll go away'...lol! BAD situation.) But this year is a completely different story. Wonderful roommie...both girls work hard to be considerate of each other and don't view self-sacrifice as 'losing'. I think that is the most important thing. At all costs, don't ever let this become a 'I win/you lose' battle.</p>