Being Socially Successful in College: By Collegeboss

Student Lounge College Life
1

<p>Hey pals,</p>

<p>I see a lot of you seem lost or unhappy socially, so I decided to give some love and help you out. Since I’m a guy, this might seem to come more from a guy’s point of view, but it’s all good. </p>

<p>Enjoy.</p>

<p>First off, you need to drop the BS left over from high school. </p>

<p>Whatever you did in high school doesn't mean jack in college. You are not your old 4.0 GPA or your Varsity Jacket. If you hooked-up with all the cheerleaders/athletes, then good for you. If you had no friends, oh well. It doesn’t mean anything right now.</p>

<p>Defining yourself with that old stuff will give you an ego, which will give mess you up in so many ways.</p>

<p>A lot of freshman in particular still carry around their high school identities and as a result are paralyzed to do anything. "I don't want to talk to that girl/guy because what if they reject me and I'm not that big pimp I was in high school!" or "I didn't talk to a single girl in high school, so I can't talk to any right now. Maybe after I graduate."</p>

<p>A lot of people want to redefine themselves when they get to college, and that is awesome. I did. But I was only able to do it when I dropped all that baggage left over from high school.</p>

<p>Drop it like it's hot.</p>

<p>Second, realize that a guy who is popular is because he lives his life a certain way, not because he looks a certain way or has certain things.</p>

<p>If you live your life in a way that is congruent to your nature and uniqueness, then there is no way you could possibly not be fully confident and at all times. </p>

<p>-- Building a Social Circle That Gives You Steady Stream of Dates</p>

<p>The path of least resistance is to build up a social circle, be the leader of that group, and get into the party scene.</p>

<p>Like the general population, most college students want to have a good time but would like others to go through the trouble of providing them with that good time.</p>

<p>So, if you can provide people with a good time, then they will want to be your friends.</p>

<p>Now, there are things that can help give you a boost in college. </p>

<ol>
<li><p>Alcohol</p></li>
<li><p>A place to party</p></li>
</ol>

<p>These are the superficial things that can get you "in" even without a personality. Obviously your personality can be just as effective if you go through the trouble of developing it.</p>

<p>Anyway, the easiest way to build a social circle that will get you an endless supply of friends/hookups is to be able to provide those two things. </p>

<p>During the first couple weeks of college, most of the people on campus are scrambling to find their place on campus. This includes the hot girls/guys. </p>

<p>So befriend a couple of them.</p>

<p>Get into a conversation with them, even if it is boring.</p>

<p>"Hey, I'm blahblah, what's your name? Where you from? How do you like it so far? "</p>

<p>Then offer them some fun.</p>

<p>"Myself and a couple others are going to xyz. You and your friends should come."</p>

<p>Exchange numbers and, boom, your set.</p>

<p>Do this to a couple of guys/girls and you've got the foundations of a solid social circle.</p>

<p>During the day, find out where the parties are going to be that night. Because you are going to be rolling out with hot girls/guys, you'll be able to get into any one of them. Because those parties will be providing alcohol, the hot girls will want to roll out with you.</p>

<p>Do you see how it all comes together?</p>

<p>If you are an upperclassman living off campus, you can offer your house up as a place to party (With alcohol, of course). Again, this will attract the hot girls/guys, which will attract other guys and their hot friends...</p>

<p>This, by the way, is pretty much how the Greek system sustains itself. As much as people like to make fun of the fraternity guys, they do have a lot of built in opportunities to meet people.</p>

<p>So there you go, the easiest way to get a steady stream of girls/guys to hook up with and have a vibrant social life.</p>

<p>If you need more help, just ask on this thread or pm me.</p>

<p>-CB</p>

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<p>

Wrong… just wrong.</li>
</ol>

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<p>It’s pretty disgusting that you act like you are the social guru when you seem to have one of the most superficial existences I’ve ever seen.</p>

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<p>not to mention that trying to reinvent yourself in college is the worst cliche in the book
your idea has some merit however, ie: you werent that cool in high school but now are trying to branch out more
still, mostly wrong</p>

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<p>Not a bad guide for someone looking to become more socially active. I’m not an advocate of underage drinking- but developing the confidence to meet new people is perhaps the most essential assets to living a more fulfilling and interesting life, both in school and out. But meeting them while they have their heads hunched over a toilet probably isn’t the best way to develop enduring and meaningful relationships. It’s quite sad that so many college students nowadays view a party as nothing more than a drinking fest…</p>

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<p>I meant providing alcohol if others want it, not just getting yourself drunk. You shouldnt need alcohol to be social. </p>

<p>TwistedxKiss: LOL. You can take your negative ■■■■■■■■ elsewhere. I want this to be positive and helpful.</p>

<p>NJSoccer: College is an opportunity to reinvent yourself; I dont think that could be denied or should be looked down upon. Its a wonderful opportunity.</p>

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<p>ITT angry asperger nerds rage at good social advice and the thought of drinking.</p>

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<p>^ Whatever you say, n00b.</p>

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<p>haha nerd backlash. This is really good btw, thanks for writing it</p>

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<p>He didn’t write it, he stole it. If you Google the post, you’ll find the same thing written on other forums months ago.</p>

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<p>I stopped reading at the word “alcohol”.</p>

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<p>

</p>

<p>This is one nasty ■■■■■</p>

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<p>

Maybe you just don’t have the guts to change, so you’ve convinced yourself it’s not possible. You’re never to blame, right? You’re probably never wrong, either.</p>

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<p>ppl are so vicious here lol…</p>

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<p>Just a note: so many high schoolers here who are opposed to drinking or don’t will find their perspectives changed once they arrive at college, moreso if the culture has any modicum of drinking acceptance (i.e. not the Big H/U Chicago). I’ve noticed it in many people at Yale who get drunk nearly every weekend and never imbibed once before arriving here.</p>

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<p>^ I’ll be an exception then.</p>

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<p>This post sounds like it was written by a first-semester freshman.</p>

<ol>
<li><p>If you’re socially ambitious, outgoing, and have good people skills, you don’t need the kind of strategy described in the original post to be successful socially in college.</p></li>
<li><p>If you’re introverted, not socially ambitious, and have poor people skills, the strategy described above will do you little or no good at all.</p></li>
<li><p>If this strategy attracts and impresses other naive freshmen, good for you. But that’s about all that it will do. Nobody who has been around longer than a year of college will be impressed or fooled by any of this.</p></li>
<li><p>This strategy is just a “foot in the door”. There’s nothing long-term or meaningful about showing up a frat party with a group of cool-looking “friends”. These “friends” will all drop you like a hot potato as soon as something equally shallow but more alluring comes along. And these “friends” won’t sustain you Sunday through Thursday. And these “friends” won’t be anywhere to be found when the tough times come along.</p></li>
<li><p>You have no “value added proposition”. Any idiot can invite a bunch of girls to a frat party. Why is that a basis of real friendships, admiration, status, etc.?</p></li>
<li><p>It’s a “ponzi scheme”. You’re assuming you can fool the first dupe and then fool the others using the first dupes.</p></li>
<li><p>How would you like me to tell your “friends” that you befriended with them simply because they were hot-looking and you thought they would be good to get you into parties and get you hookups?</p></li>
<li><p>You yourself admit that alcohol has no instrinsic appeal to you - other than the fact that other people seem to want it. So what happens when they don’t want it any more? Or what if they want it, but for wrong reasons? Or what if their attitude toward it changes? Why base your whole social circle around something (alcohol) that you don’t particularly love yourself? That would seem like the cheapest, most shallow, most sad existence I have ever seen. And ironically you’re the one strutting around like you’re the happiest guy on campus. Only freshmen are fooled by this kind of stuff. But it sounds like the one fooled most of all is you.</p></li>
</ol>

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<p>

</p>

<p>The intent is that you won’t live past freshman year, I think.</p>

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<p>Lets see. I decided to change myself when I started college. Nothing else changed. I tried to talk to people socialize, and I havenT made any friends, I haven’t been to anything, parties, outings nothing. Looks like it will be yet ANOTHER year home alone on New Years eve.</p>

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<p>God I hate myself too</p>