<p>My D is a visiting junior on the 12 college exchange here for a semester. Loves her courses but is in a single and it has not been easy to meet other students. She had to move in over a week ago with the freshmen but they were all in orientation activities which left her pretty much on her own until classes started this week. She is trying to check out club meetings, studying in the student center, etc. but so far not much luck. Her hall mates are not visible. Suggestions? She is game for pretty much anything. Tonight she went to the radio meeting. Tomorrow she will mountain bike. I think it will kick in but is quite a different experience from her tight knit group at her college. Thanks for any suggestions.</p>
<p>Movinmom, I will PM you.</p>
<p>I think any time that you come from a tight knit group into a new situation, there’s a bit of bumpy transition. I felt that way when I spent a semester abroad, I really missed my close group from Smith. </p>
<p>Probably the best thing to do is what she’s doing: go to things where you’ll meet people in a “getting to know you” situation. Clubs are a great idea. So is participating in anything where you’re with people a lot, such as a club sport, maybe building sets for a theater production (check out the Mendenhall building for that), volunteering, going on campaign trips with the Smith Democrats (very fun, great way to make good friends, and much needed during a mid-term year), doing radio. Also maybe an on-campus job? working with people can be a big help. Chatting people up while waiting in line to get into parties or waiting for dining hall food. Starting a study group with some people in her classes (you can do this often by just sending out a group email on Moodle). Going on outings with the outing club. </p>
<p>Or one good way to meet people is to take an exercise and sports studies class (if there’s still time to sign up). They’re good for you, and you’re usually doing group activities, so you have lots of time to chat during class, unlike academic classes or studying time when you’re focused on your work. </p>
<p>My attitude when I went to Smith was that I wanted to make lots of friends, no more being a wallflower. So I treated everyone I met like a potential friend. I introduced myself and just took a deep breath and started talking. To everyone. From the housekeeper to my next door neighbor. And while I think some people thought I was crazy, it did work pretty well. I got to know a large circle of people, from which my small circle of close friends emerged. </p>
<p>If push comes to shove, remember that a semester is an extremely short period of time. So just hang in there. You can do anything for a few months.</p>
<p>Thank you for your response. She is doing most of what you have suggested. She has an internship application out, intends to do the paddling and mountain biking outings, has been going to meetings, etc. I am not sure she knows about Moodle. She did not have any orientation to speak of. She arrived, I moved her in. No one was around and a few days later she went to a one hour orientation and an advisor meeting. The advisor has been great for her classes but no one oriented her to the workings of the campus. I think she is navigating that as well as she can from the website. She didn’t get any materials except a course catalogue and the freshman orientation guide which mostly had freshmen activities. She has a good attitude - she wants to get everything she can from Smith and the great town of Northampton while she is there. I think it is just a bit lonely right now. Thanks for the help and good suggestions. She will keep at it I know.</p>
<p>Has she been to her house meetings? She should figure out who in her house is her HONS (Head of New Students) and also her Student Academic Advisor (SAA), all of whom are on her house council. The HONS mostly do first year things, but I’m sure if she introduced herself to them hey’d be happy to help with her questions.</p>
<p>Also, D should hang out in the public areas of her house. Do homework in the living room, join some people when they’re watching TV, etc. (What they’re watching is not important.) When she’s going to meals, look for familiar faces and ask to sit with them - most people don’t mind having an extra person join their group. It’s not as easy to make friends as it is when everyone in your group is new (such as for first-years), but it’s definitely possible.</p>
<p>Also, if she’s just sitting in her room, she should leave the door open! You never know who might pop by.</p>
<p>Yes, definitely leaving your door open is a great way to meet people. Playing music quietly also helps. If other people in your hall have their doors open it’s totally okay to just walk by and stop and say “Hi, I’m so and so, I just moved in to room such and such.”</p>
<p>Thanks for your posts. She does leave her door open but she is on a side alcove so there is no traffic by her room except the one girl who lives at the end but she has yet to see her. SHe has a friend visiting tonight so hopefully they can find something going on and see if they can meet people. How do you find out where the parties and other activities are? At her school notices go out over email to everyone. Do you have something like this?</p>
<p>For information about parties, look at your feet! At Smith we do chalkings, so whatever is going on around campus will be chalked on the ground and also on some classroom chalkboards. People hang up fliers too, in the houses and in the dining halls and campus center.</p>
<p>Thanks again for the helpful suggestions.</p>