To put a little (true) humor on the subject all I can picture is a bunch of cars beelining to the nearest fast food restaurants to use their bathrooms to change!! LOL, something we have done in the past (don’t worry, we’d at least buy a drink for their bathroom changing facilities!). 
I think it does depend. We didn’t go to my stepsister’s wedding because I’d just had D. And D was in her best friend’s wedding and we were invited but couldn’t go. D of course went. She was invited separately. D has also been in weddings were we weren’t invited…but it does vary.
I feel like this is asking too much of guests. But could it be a cultural thing? Is this normal for Indian weddings? I’ve been to weddings where it says formal wear or semi-formal or business casual. I also went to one that that said men had to wear collared shirts, but that was because it was at a country club that had a dress code.
I’ve never been to a wedding that required people to wear a certain color or expected the guests to change outfits.
My colleague has a niece who is really into cosplay (her husband is too) and they said that people could wear cosplay costumes, but it wasn’t a requirement. Several of their friends, who do cosplay too, dressed up, but many guests did not. I guess they didn’t want guests to feel like they HAD to spend a lot of money and time trying to dress up as some character from a Marvel, Disney, or Star Wars movie. Expecting grandpa to dress as Obi-Wan-Kenobi would be a little much.
I love that dress!
But if the reception is “jewel toned” I’d aim for that. The reception is where you’ll be interacting for a much longer period of time (maybe a long time) and meeting people. That said–nobody will blink an eye at anything you decide to wear and you’ll have a great time. But you may feel out of place and stick out in a sea of bright colors (if it’s anything close to what I attended.)
I’ve read that the one color you want to stay away from at an Indian wedding is red because the bride might wear it.
My son enjoyed dressing in Indian clothes for his friend’s wedding . He thought it was fun and i think it could be as long as it’s not a requirement .
You may find the requests are not that bad once you actually see the invitation and website. Enjoy the wedding!
See? This is the problem! I would have much preferred to have gone with a jewel tone, but I didn’t want to be in a BOLD color standing out at the wedding in the church in a sea of pastels!
This pale blue dress was NOT inexpensive. I do like it (particularly the cut/style), and the color is okay on me. I think it is pretty timeless, so I know I will get good use out of it.
This is the dress I have for the reception if I decide I should change. Honestly, whether or not I change may depend on what our other friends decide to do. Our hotel is halfway between the church and the reception. No gas station changing for me.
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In a traditional Indian wedding ceremony the bride wears red but at the wedding I attended the saris woment wore included red (very bright red/orange with gold–the bride actually wore a white and gold sari.
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We almost didn’t go to my nephew’s wedding last July because our daughter was having a double mastectomy the next day.
As a rule and without a really good reason, you usually are accepting certain wedding invitations. The issue of not liking the dress code is not a reason why I would turn down an invitation.
The somewhat good thing is that our daughter got covid and her surgery was postponed. We called and asked if we could attend at the last minute. It wasn’t exactly what I wanted to do but it felt like something we should and needed to do.
It was incredibly awkward also. As everyone knew what was going on and I really didn’t want to talk about my daughters situation. But I went and played nice.
That’s good to know about the red specifics in Indian weddings, @gouf78 .
Both dresses are very nice, @Hoggirl ! The pastel one is similar in color to the blue mist dress I wore for my son’s wedding last year.
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I think the “dress code” in this particular case is because it’s cultural (lots of family and traditional clothing being worn). It’s not just the instagram thing where a bride is looking for “perfect pictures”.
Just where what you want and go have fun!
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I bought a dress for a fall wedding I was attending. I think I ended up wearing it to 7 weddings over two years. Most of these weddings the people didn’t know each other but whenever it was time to go, this dress just seemed to be the appropriate thing to wear.
I called it my wedding dress. It was red.
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The one color to NOT wear to an Indian wedding is black. If your husband has a suit other than black I’d be pushing that.
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Love that style!
An article about dressing for an Indian wedding. Mentions red and black issues . Also, pastels for day, jewel tones in the evening, etc. And that wearing Western attire is okay too.
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Yes, the bride at an Indian wedding often wears red. I know this from watching waaaay too many episodes of Say Yes to the Dress.
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@Hoggirl l have to say, I think you’d look fabulous in one of these outfits!
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Oh, no!! Really? I think he has a gray suit as well, but I’m sure it is very out of style. There is no way my husband is going to buy a new suit.
Early on in the planning, there was some talk of this wedding being black tie.
The on,y time I’ve ever changed for a wedding was at my youngest sister’s wedding. The service was a morning wedding followed by a brunch. The reception was in the evening. I had two perfect dresses and wore one in the morning. Relaxed in the afternoon and changed for the reception.
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Here you go- My son wore something like this for his friend’s wedding (the friend’s bride was Indian ).
https://a.co/d/agBRtoZ
I’m sure you and your husband will look great, no matter what you decide to wear!
For the Indian weddings that I have been to, general guidelines were to avoid red and white as those are bridal colors and to stay from black as that is considered inauspicious for a Hindu wedding.
For the other weddings, guidelines were to avoid white and black. Not so different really!
Wear what you like, and what works for you. Change between the ceremonies if you like. That’s my plan for the 2 events where a color has been gently suggested. I have no patience for shopping for multiple outfits. I may carry a scarf or shawl in the suggested color to conform to the dress code.
@Hoggirl Both the dresses that you’ve linked look lovely and you would look great in either. The main thing is enjoy the time celebrating the event with good friends!
Well, thank you, but I have no plans to wear traditional Indian clothing to either the wedding ceremony or the reception.
I have to say that my MOG friend is struggling even wearing Indian clothing to the reception. I think it feels artificial/almost costume-like to her? But, she will abide by the bride’s wishes and wear Indian attire to the reception. I’m dying to learn what they brought back for her to wear for that. This thread prompted me to text her. However, she was very relieved that her future daughter-in-law was okay with a traditional, formal, and navy evening gown. My friend cannot wear pastels at all.