Boarding School Final Conclusions/Realizations

<p>Hey Guys, I received my St. Paul's and Exeter acceptance packages today. :D Originally, I was like, I really want to go to Andover! But now, I've realized, it just wasn't meant to be, and I'm honestly really excited about these two schools... I made this as a final conclusion to our experiences, did we overshoot, undershoot, what would we do differently, what realizations have we made?</p>

<p>Hey, congratulations! :D</p>

<p>Congrats! Good job on everything you have done so far.</p>

<p>Congratulations. But I wish you had given this thread a different name. There are many, many families left without options on the boards and we had started a thread to ask students to post their good news but wait a while before gloating. This isn’t so much about “realizations” as it is about bragging.</p>

<p>You have a lot to be proud of, and thankful for. But this might be a good time for some sensitivity to the kids who worked just as hard and have not had the same outcome.</p>

<p>Don’t think it was meant that way, Exie. It can sometimes be difficult to let go of ones first choice, even when one has other great options. And I think that even the kids on this board who succeeded might have thoughts about how they’d do things differently.</p>

<p>How can any kid ‘overshoot’ as the OP says, and be accepted into Exeter & SPS? That isn’t bragging? OP needs to be really grateful for having an opportunity few people in the world can experience, rather than moaning about it.</p>

<p>Yeah, I don’t think the OP intended for it to be that way. I think he’s asking for any reflections on the process - both good and bad. For example, I wish I had applied to a larger array of schools and spent more time looking into different types (i.e. ones in CA, hidden gems, etc.). This could also be a helpful thread for 2012-2013 school year applicants to look at for advice and ideas.</p>

<p>Exie, if I want to share good news I am allowed too. Most people on the board know me from chats, etc. But if I really wanted to “brag” I would have done something much different than that. The title clearly says final revelations. My conclusion is that even though the entire “journey” I really wanted to go to andover, in the end, it didn’t happen, and I just don’t think it was meant to happen…I’m sorry if there’s a thread that I wanted to create so everyone could give their thoughts on the process and wisdom to future cc’ers.</p>

<p>I didn’t say in my case that all the things like, “overshoot,” “undershoot,” etc. were true. But for the other cc’ers who may have done that. Some may have only applied, like my friend, to andover and exeter, which they later regret. I just don’t want other applicants in the future to do the same.</p>

<p>I agree, Exie. This thread is just bragging by another name. Magusalex knows it even if s/he doesn’t want to admit it. No matter how many people warn kids on this site prior to M10 to show a little sensitivity to others who didn’t get good news, there’s always someone…</p>

<p>throughout this entire process i have not found too many threads with people talking about their experiences, advice, etc. I made this thread for other people. I didn’t ask for “congratulations” from other members, I just wanted their thoughts on the admissions process. Most threads now are always clogged with pessimistic and naggy cc’ers that try to put students down and write about how immature the entire thing is, I thought this thread would be different but I guess not. I’m sorry that I can’t please everyone, but just because I write where I have been accepted and what I’ve realized does not mean I’m trying to brag, and I’m sorry if it came across like that because I didn’t mean it too…</p>

<p>Instead of hearing complaints, can this thread please just be what it was meant to be? </p>

<p>Admit: St. Paul’s, Exeter
Waitlisted: Andover (yes, I was if you wanted to know)
Overshoot: No.
Undershoot: No.
What I would do differently: I think I would have applied to more schools, there are so many hidden gems waiting to be found.
Realizations: My first choice in the beginning doesn’t always have to be the first choice in the end. If it wasn’t meant to happen, it wasn’t meant to happen. “Love the school that loves you,” gives me meaning, a close friend of mind fell in love with Lawerenceville and was flat out rejected, if you fall in love with a school in the beginning, it may just leave you heartbroken. Wait to see your options, then fall in love. As she said, “You never know how much you love a school until they reject you,” and in truth, you don’t. So the conclusion, try not to get too emotionally attatched to a school, because the feeling may not be mutual; the decision will probably prove to be better for you in the end…</p>

<p>Sometimes it’s hard for a person to hear themselves. Imagine someone saying, I got in to Harvard and Princeton [smile face], but I had my heart set on Yale. What should I have done differently? Then imagine the question being asked right at the time 1 of 7 people are getting bad news from all three schools. The entire context of your question, however innocent and unintentional, is going to make a whole lot of people feel even worse than they already do - and not a little angry at what sounds like thinly veiled bragging.</p>

<p>Timing is everything. If you posted this, say, at the end of the summer when new bs candidates are coming on board, it might be genuinely helpful.</p>

<p>Try to give this a real life, face-to-face context. Would you go into a group of friends, a pile of whom had just been rejected or waitlisted at boarding schools, and say something like what you just said in your first post? </p>

<p>Asking you to be kind and not self-congratulatory THREE DAYS after decisions have been made, when the wounds of many are still raw is not naggy and pessimistic. It’s good manners.</p>

<p>@magusalex,</p>

<p>Everyone understands your excitement and you’ve been congratulated for it. But we are trying to send you a message so you can learn BEFORE you get on campus and do the same thing in a different situation and get ostracized for it. Timing is everything, discretion and humility on campus is sometimes valued above all else, and if you had simply set up your post as you did in #12 there would be no pushback. It’s a good concept. But your original post #1 was poorly timed and in bad taste and killed much of the good vibe you could have generated.</p>

<p>It’s not what you said, but the way you said it that changed the entire tone of the thread. And I doubt with that start many of the families (especially students) who failed to achieve the same results will be rushing to post here (and alas - the proof is in the lack of those posts to respond to your query). Look again, at post #12. That’s how it should have been framed from the beginning. Post #1 was insensitive and gauche :(</p>

<p>But other than the overshoot/undershoot category–which is useful–I don’t see the difference between this and the clean stats thread. Why not just suggest that they add that criteria there? And see if you can get them to add FA/FP while you’re at it.</p>

<p>I have already finished this conversation, I am sorry that I cannot please everyone, and I realize that it may have sounded “braggy.” Yet it still seems no one understands the fact that I didn’t mean to sound that way; I am sorry that people congratulated me when I didn’t want them too, because I don’t need anyone else’s support to know the achievement. This thread was not made for congratulations, it was made for knowledge. And again, I’m sorry that many cc’ers think I bragged on purpose and such, but in truth, I understand that it may have sounded airheaded, but what do you expect for me to do now? I can’t erase the comment. I know that in writing it sounds snarky, but writing doesn’t always sound the same in words. As I read my first post in MY voice, it doesn’t sound snarky at all, I say I have gotten in, but the more important idea of this thread is the fact that while I was accepted, I realized that my “dreams” of going to andover didn’t work for me in the end and I’m fine with that. At the same time, students who have been rejected and waitlisted, I am sorry; this does show you though, that even though you may not have gotten what you wanted, in the end, many times people realize it was better outcome anyways. I can’t please everyone’s emotions, and if they’re angry at me for being happy, or even posting I was accepted, I’m sorry. Isn’t there the phrase “when you try to please everyone, you please no one?”</p>

<p>parlabane, I am not saying what should I do differently, but I’m saying what my own reflection of myself is. What do I think I should have done differently, I don’t need a chance or help getting into andover, I’m trying to prove the point that one school isn’t the world, because in the end, it isn’t everything. </p>

<p>classicalmama, I am not saying you cc’ers are pessimistic, I’m saying some are. I’m sorry that some cc’ers may look at the post and feel bad about not getting in, but they shouldn’t. I’m not saying, “haha you suck.” Some cc’ers may have open wounds, and I feel bad for them, but if I have to please everyone, it’s going to be difficult, because even the most irrelevant post could make anyone feel bad.</p>

<p>I understand everyone’s point, and I am apologizing. I just want this thread to be helpful to future cc’ers, so they in the future may improve their decision on applying to certain schools and maybe even have a better outcome. Even putting down Accepted: St. Paul’s and Exeter could cause someone to become emotional and I’m sorry if I have made anyone sad.</p>

<p>magusalex, fwiw, I see nothing wrong with your posts taken at face value, without reading anything into them. No need to apologize, imo.</p>