Boarding school

Parents Forum
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<p>MomofWildChild:
Yeah, as I said, my D would have been in heaven to have attended Interlochen, I’m sure. The OP just needs to know that no matter where you go to high school, you can succeed in selective college admissions and succeed in your career. MOWC, while my D didn’t go to a school anything like Interlochen, she had her total immersion once she got to Tisch. Her life starting in nursery school has been theater and we’ve known it since then and it continues on now professionally. While she grew up in the middle of nowhere, she is doing well in NYC at a young age in her profession. Interlochen would have been a wonderful HS for her, but just was not possible. She did go away for 8 summers to a theater immersion program and then really got her fix when she got to college in NYC. It all worked out. That is the main point for the OP.</p>

<p>If you are someone who excels, you can excel no matter where you go to high school and the rest will follow. If you have a choice of high schools and can find an idyllic learning environment, go for it, for that reason only, and not due to some expectation that that will be a ticket to college and success. Successful people come from all sorts of high schools. Also, if you are driven, motivated and an achiever, you will stand out in certain high school settings.</p>

42

<p>I remember one parent who has son at elite BS saying that all the AP courses are for very few super-kids. Although there are many AP courses at elite BS, not anyone can take the course, student can’t take honors if he/she doesn’t get A- in the previous course…In that way we have to think about “opportunities.” As you said, your son will get in JV sports and Honors or AP Physics easily at a local school which he can have more confidence and show capability for college admission.</p>

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<p>AP courses at many boarding schools are extremely rigorous. Students do not automatically take ALL AP courses. They tend to focus on their areas of strength. For example, my son took AP History and Lit but stayed away from the science APs. It didn’t hurt his college admissions (disclosure- he did have a hook) or that of others who did something similar. With just a few exceptions, a student didn’t take 4 or 5 AP classes at a time the way kids at public high schools tend to do. The kids come out extremely well prepared for college. My niece was at a strong public high school in the Phila area- got great grades and didn’t really have to work very hard. College was a very rude wake up call.</p>

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<p>longtermplan…but adcoms are quite familiar with many of the boarding schools and have a sense of context when looking at a student’s transcript…if they know, for example, that taking 8 AP classes at that boarding school is very rare, the kid is not going to be penalized for taking 5 or compared to the kid who took 8 at a certain public school. Students’ records are totally looked at in context of the school where they attend. </p>

<p>MOWC…I totally get your point about how well prepared the kids are for college coming from rigorous boarding schools and how your niece who went to a public school was not fully prepared for the rigors of college. I just want to say that it is not so black and white. My kids went to an unknown public high school that sends just a couple students per year to highly selective colleges, and yet my kids were well prepared for college and were able to stand out at their highly selective colleges or programs among kids who had gone to elite prep schools. Just saying.</p>

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<p>“Students’ records are totally looked at in context of the school where they attend.”
I agree but still colleges like to know if a student is ready for the college level. And it
would be nice to take college level course as an exposure for college work. Even if it’s
elite BS, taking regular courses might not be competitive in college admission process.
Although it’s elite BS, colleges may still want rigorous courses in student’s transcript.</p>

46

<p>Regular classes at the upper boarding schools DO prepare you for college- as do many regular high schools. As soozie said, there are many differences between schools.</p>

47

<p>Longtermplan, yes, it is important if seeking very selective college admissions, to be able to show a very rigorous course schedule. However, an elite college may be willing to go deeper into a class from an elite boarding school (for example, top 20% of class, very rigorous but not most demanding curriculum at that school, etc.) whereas at a public school of the sort my kids attended, they would only be willing to accept a student with the most demanding schedule offered, highest GPA and class ranking, and so on. In other words, the very very very tippy top of seniors from our high school might get into an elite college (I’m talking of just a few kids total), whereas from an elite boarding school, a highly selective college may be willing to dip to the 20th kid from the top (hypothetically speaking if they ranked) who wasn’t in every AP class offered at that prep school, and didn’t have the highest GPA in the class. Such a student may be on par with the top kid from a high school like ours. </p>

<p>For example, my D attended Brown. She went to a rural public high school where she was the only senior to attend any Ivy League school that year. Her roommate at Brown attended an elite prep day school that is VERY small. Even so, roommate had 8 classmates who got in ED to Brown. </p>

<p>Another example to compare…we have approx. 150 seniors in our HS and I just gave you an example from my D1’s year. I am an independent college counselor and I have a client this year who goes to a Private day prep school. The senior class at that high school is of a similar size, about 135 students. IN the past three years (total three classes), 52 students got into Stanford! Compare that to one student I know from the past ten years at our HS who went to Stanford. If 17 kids per year from that private school got into Stanford, they are not all in the top 10% of their HS class or don’t all have perfect GPAs or likely do not all have the highest number of AP classes possible at that HS. At our HS, you can bet the kid who got into Stanford was val (like my kid who went to Brown) and had a perfect GPA and took the most rigorous courses available (hardly any APs are offered in fact.) And believe me, these kids were ready for college level work. As I said, my kid who went to the Ivy, got excellent grades there, was chosen for the highest award from her department at graduation and got into several top grad schools in her field. </p>

<p>So, you can be ready for elite colleges no matter where you go to high school but an elite college is going to skim off the tippy top at a high school like ours and is willing to go deeper into the class from an elite boarding school to pluck some students (often a high number at that).</p>

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<p>To reinforce soozie’s comments look at the matriculation stats for the top boarding schools and you will see a large percentage of the gradutating class goes on to elite colleges. You do not even have to be in the top 20% of your class. Yes, some of that is impacted by legaciess and hooks, but not the majority.</p>

<p>Also to reinforce soozie’s comment - at the BS my kids went to there is not AP English. However, just about every kid takes the English AP exam junior year. Elite colleges certainly know that the “regular” classes in an elite BS are like an Honors or AP class in a “regular” school.</p>

<p>Finally, I also want to support the statement that an elite BS does not necessarily help getting into an elite college. My D1 got into a great school, she is a driven student and probably would have gotten into the same school from our decent public school. However, her experience in BS let her participate in her EC at a level that would not be possible outside of the BC environment. So it was a good choice for her. D2 on the other hand will probably get into a better school as a result of BS. But, that’s because she is a smart kid who did not work very hard in MS. She needed the motivation, competition and discipline that BS provides to make her the best kind of student she could be. So in summary, choose BS because it is the right choice for your kid’s development, not because it will get them into a better college.</p>

49

<p>Paraphrasing: The school may have a very good reason for not putting the kid on JV or allowing him to take Honors Physics.</p>

<p>No!!! The reason we are paying the near $50,000 a year is for more opportunities. Schools shouldn’t be deciding who takes Honors Physics. If the student feels he is ready and is willing to take the risk, as long as there is room in the class–let him take a risk and fall if necessary and learn by his mistakes. This is what prep school is all about, letting someone take calculated risks and fail or make mistakes and learn from them. </p>

<p>In terms of the sports, I had dinner with him last night and from what he says the coach says: there are too many kids who want to do sports. Even some of the thirds were cut and many of the frosh now have to do intramural sports instead of interscholastic.</p>

<p>Again, my answer to this is, paying $50,000??–hire more coaches!!!</p>

50

<p>Well, I will say this, redbluegoldgreen…in ANY school, there usually is some sort of criteria to be placed in an “advanced” class like Honors or AP. I don’t know the criteria at your kid’s boarding school. But here at public school, you’d have to have a certain grade in the course that preceded the one you are going into and have been recommended for that level. Not sure how that works in ninth grade in a new school. Another thing is that perhaps in public school, your son stands out academically and would be placed in the highest level classes but at an elite boarding school, where high academic achievers are the norm, it may be harder to be placed in the highest level classes. Something to consider. </p>

<p>For sports, I was with ya originally when I thought that your son was OUT of sports for freshmen year when he was told that as a freshman, he would not be on the JV team and I felt sorry for your kid as here, a kid who wants to play usually can (my D was on JV for some teams as a freshmen and varsity for teams that had just one level as a freshmen). BUT now you are saying that freshmen still play the sport at your son’s school but on an intramural level. Here, due to a lot of boys wanting soccer, I believe they added an interscholastic freshmen team in addition to the JV and V teams. So, freshmen could still play the sport but the JV team could not accommodate them all (though some freshmen do make JV or even V if outstanding). The bottom line, in my view, is that the kid has the opportunity to continue the sport. If your son’s school is particularly large or many kids play sports, that is a consideration when picking the school. My kid was a three varsity sport athlete in high school but the chances of making teams was not as difficult as if it had been a huge school.</p>

51

<p>some misunderstanding here:</p>

<p>yes, my kid met the prereqs for Honors Physics, but due to over-enrollment is stuck in reg Physics</p>

<p>same thing with sport: No, there is no intramurals for his sport. Lots of the frosh can’t due thirds because overly subscribed…he is lucky enough to be able to get on a freshman (thirds team) in his sport, but many of the frosh were cut and now are doing an intramural in another sport. There is no intramural in his sport. He was lucky enough to get a spot on thirds (vs. JV), but some kids not so lucky and are footing the same tuition bill. No I don’t agree with another poster that these kids are lucky because now they have an opportunity to try another sport. Many kids have tried a variety of sports already before settling on the one they have talent in and have been doing, and going to camp for, so as to try to secure a spot on JV.</p>

52

<p>my main point is that parents elect an expensive boarding school thinking their kids will get more opportunities, but I am now wondering the validity and wisdom of that thinking…maybe the grass isn’t always greener. In my particular case, it may have been better to keep him at the local public school where he can play (and hopefully excel) in both sports and classes.</p>

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<p>RE: post #51:
If your child truly meets the criteria for Honors Physics and it is over-enrolled, and many parents are unhappy about that, they should advocate for another section at that level. How did the school decide who got in and who didn’t if there was not enough room? I’d want to know that. </p>

<p>I’m not entirely following the sports vignette in #51, forgive me, as I have never had a child attend boarding school and so I do not know what “thirds team” is. Is “thirds” a freshmen team? If so, I would not have a problem if my kid was on “freshmen team” which was added for a sport that had too many kids and then moved up to JV in soph year. As long as he is still doing the sport is what I would care about. Are you saying kids were also cut from the freshmen team ("thirds’?) That is too bad. I’d want my freshmen to be able to at least play their sport either interscholastically or intramurally (the latter is fine if they don’t make the interscholastic team). Then again, it is a fact of life that not everyone can make a team (or be cast in a show, etc.) and so at some point, kids are cut and don’t make a team or get cast in a show in high school (and in college too). If your school offers intramural sports, at least the cut kids have something. We don’t have intramurals at our high school.</p>

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<p>post 52:

</p>

<p>Hmm, well, I have never elected an expensive boarding school (for two reasons…wanting to bring our kids up at home but also could never afford it), but if I had done so, it would not be just to have “more opportunities.” It would be more for the learning environment and what the school offers that is a better fit for my kid. I would not see it as “more opportunities” so much but just DIFFERENT opportunities.</p>

<p>Also, at an elite boarding school, there is more “competition,” so to speak, for placement in high level classes, for for being chosen for a certain EC endeavor or having a leadership position, or for becoming a standout on campus. That’s OK but realize that is what you are dealing with. There are trade-offs to get the kind of environment at the boarding school to possibly being more of a standout back home at the public school and so on.</p>

<p>Here is a little example, albeit it is not boarding school, which I haven’t experienced first hand. My younger D is a talented singer/actor/dancer. At our local public schools, she has played the leads time after time. She was even the leads in the high school musicals and plays when still a middle school student. She went away every summer to a theater program out of state (costs a lot!) that draws kids nationally and internationally from the time she was 9. Many of the kids there were the standouts in their local communities back home, as she was. We had no idea how she’d fare given how much more competitive the talent pool was. She ended up faring very well for the 8 summers she attended and was leads many times and chosen for an elite troupe they have there starting her first year, but she wasn’t always a lead and knew the competition was WAY stiffer there than at home. She had to lower the expectations a bit. Fast forward to getting into specialized musical theater programs for college that accept anywhere from 2-8% who audition/apply, and then she was dealing with all the STANDOUTS from around the country. Very tough odds. She fared well but again, we were very nervous about making it in since the talent pool was very concentrated. Now, she is Equity and is up against the very very best when she attends an audition, for say, Broadway. This type of thing is how it goes in many fields and many EC areas.</p>

<p>Your post about how much it is costing reminds me of something from my D’s summer theater program (ages 8-18) which is very costly and a well known program with a national reputation. Every kid who attended was cast in a show (they put on 36 full scale productions every summer) and so every kid got to participate. But they also have an elite “cabaret troupe” by audition which selects the top kids, so to speak, in musical theater, usually ranging from 13-18 roughly. This troupe is at a very high level and was taken off campus to perform in resort nightclub venues to the public. My D was fortunate to make it into this troupe at age 9 which was rare. The experience of that group was a highlight of her summers (the level of the kids in it was very high and many go onto top colleges in the field and many are now on Broadway, national tours and the like). But every year, there were parents who complained that their kids did not make it into this cabaret and they were paying a lot of money for their kid to attend. I don’t get it as in every situation for this age group, there are “varsity teams” and not everyone can make it in! Granted it is easy for me to say since my kid was selected from day one at a young age and in this troupe every summer, I realize. But every kid who attended the program was in a show, but certain kids were selected basically for this additional show. The complaints went on and on. Since my D “graduated” that program (she is now 21), they have made a change. They still have the select cabaret troupe by audition, but they no longer take that group to perform off campus at resort nightclubs, which had been a big deal when they had done so. Now, they just perform for the other kids and for parents. I think it is too bad and I don’t get the concept that every kid should be chosen for everything. It’s life. Not everyone makes it in. This is good to know before your kid applies to elite colleges where terrific kids are denied admission.</p>

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<p>redblue- I guess maybe your kid isn’t as good as you think he is if he was cut from JV. Sorry you are unhappy with the school, but to act like they should hire more coaches since you are “paying $50K” is absurd. I’m sure there is extra physics work your son can do to be challenged. I know at ALL the schools our family was involved with (and there were a number…), a truly gifted child could find SOME faculty member to mentor him or her and provide opportunities to stretch.</p>

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<p><<are you=“” saying=“” kids=“” were=“” also=“” cut=“” from=“” the=“” freshmen=“” team=“” (“thirds’?)=”" that=“” is=“” too=“” bad.=“” i’d=“” want=“” my=“” to=“” be=“” able=“” at=“” least=“” play=“” their=“” sport=“”>></are></p>

<p>Yes, Sooz, that is what I am saying…you got it. That’s what I want to.</p>

<p><<but to=“” act=“” like=“” they=“” should=“” hire=“” more=“” coaches=“” since=“” you=“” are=“” “paying=”" $50k"=“” is=“” absurd.=“”>></but></p>

<p>mowc: no, what’s absurd is paying $50 grand and having nothing to show for it. It’s in the best interest of the school, to put on more coaches. People vote with their feet. If I feel like I’m not getting my money’s worth, I’ll look elsewhere. It’s only good business for schools to give customers what they want, otherwise they will find themselves out of business very soon and most high-end schools realize this.</p>

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<p>oh yea,
<<how did=“” the=“” school=“” decide=“” who=“” got=“” in=“” and=“” didn’t=“” if=“” there=“” was=“” not=“” enough=“” room?=“” i’d=“” want=“” to=“” know=“” thatby=“” way,=“”>></how></p>

<p>We are also trying to get an answer as to why S was not enrolled in the Honors Physics class he registered for and met prereqs for. So far, have contacted school, and they are looking into it.</p>

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<p>redblue…but your school IS providing freshmen teams (thirds) for many of the sports or is providing intramural teams so that most freshmen are not eliminated from doing something in their sport. Are there a lot of kids who can’t do ANY level of their sport as a freshman? </p>

<p>But beyond freshmen year, really, I don’t think you can expect everyone who wants to be on a team to be actually be on a team. In most high schools, there are tryouts for sports and plays and what not and not everyone makes it. It just is the way it is. You are lucky that your high school at least has some freshmen teams and some intramural sports that accommodates more kids. But in all schools, not everyone makes it into every group that is by selection. My feelings about that would not differ whether or not I was paying big bucks or going to public. It is part of the high school experience all over. And if anything, you run into more “competition” of talented kids in a very selective high school setting and so it goes with the territory.</p>

<p>Say your elite boarding school kid was an actor. How would you feel if the play has 20 parts and 40 kids try out and your kid doesn’t get a part? That must happen at elite boarding schools, no?</p>

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<p>redblue…re: Honors Physics…I cross posted…but how do you know the class was overenrolled or that your kid just was not selected? In other words, if 20 kids met the criteria to be in Honors level but there wasn’t room, then another section should have been added. But I can’t tell if you are assuming it was overenrolled or if there was another reason your son was not chosen for the class. In any case, glad you inquired.</p>

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<p>While not HS, my kid went to a very expensive university…NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts. Parents pay big bucks for that school. You have to be very talented to get in (my kid’s program accepted 6%). But you can pay all those bucks and your kid is never cast in a show because the talent pool there is very high and concentrated. This is normal and so this is what you get at your elite boarding school too when it comes to being selected for various actitivies.</p>