Can Someone Please Score my Essay?

<p>When we go shopping, most of us do not think about the impact our spending has on other people. However, if we buy products from companies or individuals that mistreat their employees or the environment, or that otherwise do harm, we indirectly approve or even encourage such behavior. On the other hand, it may be unrealistic to assume that anything would prevent people from buying a good product at the right price.</p>

<p>Do consumers have a responsibility to purchase goods only from companies and people whose actions are beneficial to others?</p>

<p>Essay:
It is impossible to buy products solely from companies that are entirely beneficial because no such company or product exists, and people have a responsibility to themselves to be realistic in their goals. Some products may be fair trade, but they could be harmful to the environment. In addition, people owe it to themselves to buy products that they can afford and obtain.
No product is completely beneficial because where a company might treat employees well the product might be environmentally harmful. For example, there are children’s toys on the market that are fair trade; therefore, the employees are treated and paid fairly. These toys, although great for the workers, are detrimental to the environment because they are not packaged in biodegradable plastics. The converse is also true. Electric cars are great for the environment because they reduce the carbon footprint, but the workers are not all paid well and work under harsh factory conditions. Furthermore, who defines what is beneficial? Is it simply paying workers well, or is it treating them with respect? Although there exist organizations that define this term, individual people define it differently.<br>
In addition, people must be realistic in what they are capable of accomplishing in terms of buying beneficial products. The average consumer does not have the time or the money to investigate the treatment of employees and of the environment for every product he buys. Many people also are not capable of buying the more expensive fair trade products. Furthermore, it is more harmful to the environment to drive hundreds of miles to obtain an environmentally friendly product than it would be to buy a less environmentally friendly product closer to home. There must exist a balance between practicality and benefit.
There is some responsibility for consumers to buy beneficial products, but it is an unrealistic goal to buy solely safe products because they do not exist. The effect the consumers have on companies is indirect, whereas the effect a person has on his family is immediate.</p>

<p>Actually I’m proud of myself cuz I’m pooping in the toilet saw your essay and I decided to come in to help:</p>

<p>Hopefully your exam date is 25th Jan, here’s my 2 cents</p>

<p>Speaking harshly (Sorry Dear), there are fatalities in your essay, for example, your thesis (main view/position) is unclear, should be presently clearly in the first paragraph and coming back you should have a closing paragraph (Always be Closing)</p>

<p>Another thing is your examples are too short and you must put in more detail.</p>

<p>Note that your markers will take 60 seconds average (Thats like peeing) to literally SKIM through your essay to grade it. The more they mark the more money they make YOU MUST FILL THE 2 PAGES COMPLETELY AND WRITE SMALL. it is almost guaranteed at your word count, you cannot get a 10, even a 9 will be unlikely.</p>

<p>If your from the United States I suggest you quickly grab Tom Clement’s How To Write A Killer SAT Essay and grab the techniques for writing a good SAT essay</p>

<p>Google up “How to write SAT essay” and “Classical 5 paragraph structure” For more info.</p>

<p>Hope my mean comments helped…</p>

<p>Thanks so much for the tips</p>

<p>your welcome, seize the day! :D</p>

<p>By the way, is your essay topic an actual SAT essay prompt, I don’t remember seeing one of those in the past few years</p>