<p>Hope my son doesn't stumble across this post...</p>
<p>Son has appt to USMA, is hoping for USNA (3Q, 2 noms). </p>
<p>This is shallow. I'm really a bit horrified at myself for even asking BUT I just can't help it. I've searched the forums for possible past posts and can't find it asked anywhere else.</p>
<p>Son has ears that stick out like pitcher handles a bit. Doesn't matter if he can wear his hair civilian style but that crew cut is going to display it to the world. Add to that our last name, which is one of those ultimate joke names, and I'm worried he's going to take it really rough anywhere he ends up. Should I just forget about it and figure it the "Boy Named Sue" benefit or should I really consider researching having his ears pinned?</p>
<p>I am doing really good so far not being a clingy or helicopter parent but I can't stop wondering about this. Anybody have a sane opinion so I can just put this behind me?</p>
<p>1: He's managed all these years. I'm sure he's had someone make fun of him by now. He obviously is handling it ok.</p>
<p>2; DON'T; I repeat DON'T; do anything medically to him. If you do, you take a chance at him losing his possible appointment to the academy. Too long of an explanation, just trust me on this one.</p>
<p>3; Once he's out of the academy, it doesn't matter where he get's stationed. 78% +/- of all the military people will be ENLISTED people. That means he will outrank them. Which means that other than his peers, no one is going to make fun of him. He's an officer, the others aren't. </p>
<p>Now, if his peers want to mess with him, it will depend on his attitude and response. If he realizes that he was born that way and there isn't crap he can do about it; and he handles and kidding with dignity and maturity, then his peers will respect him. He will become stronger and a better leader. If he's going to let it bother him and complain to his C.O. or get angry; then he will become alienated and no one will respect him.</p>
<p>I wouldn't do ANYTHING about it. I would ask your son about it. Also, if he is hell bent hard core set on the academy, then get him a military crew cut now. Let him get use to the kids he already knows teasing him. These are kids he grew up with and like. He can get use to it and then be more prepared when he goes into the academy. My opinion.</p>
<p>He is tough (runs his boarding school dorm of 30+ upperclassmen) and I know he'll make it.</p>
<p>Thanks for: 1. The words about not doing anything medically. Understood.
2. Words about enlisted and officers. Duh on me. I'm still learning!
3. Idea to get that haircut NOW. GREAT idea! He comes home in a week for spring break. I'll suggest it as an option.</p>
<p>I totally understand your concerns. I wonder how your son feels about himself. Is this something he has mentioned before that he is self-conscious about? Is he emotionally strong enough with a good sense of humor to let it roll off of him, or are you afraid it will break him if "teased" to an extreme? Also, how will DoDMERB deal with cosmetic surgery? (I have no idea if this even enters into the picture).</p>
<p>I hypothetically asked my son who is entering the class of 2012 how he would feel, or if he would make fun of someone in this situation. He candidly answered that while it will be tempting to giggle about someone else's physical features, he knows he himself will get a lot of ribbing with our last name. And while I had never really thought about it before, I guarantee you he will get a lot of abuse over our last name. </p>
<p>So when put into that frame of thinking, since we all have our flaws and imperfections and unusual features, unless you think it is something that he is extremely sensitive about, I would probably talk to him about it, let him make the decision on his own (barring it causing DoDMERB problems), and then try to let it go yourself.</p>
<p>I have known a few kids who had the surgery done. The kids were still pretty young at the time and it was done more because the parents were concerned for the social interactions later in life. I have also known a few other kids whose ears protruded a bit more, and they are happy well adjusted young men, even with short hair.</p>
<p>I love this question, and I love your motherliness. I bet nobody notices his ears a week or two into summer, when every plebe breaks out in truly revolting acne due to humidity, sweat, 30-sec showers, etc. </p>
<p>Great idea to get the cut now -- he'll be advised to get a short haircut well before I-Day to expose his scalp to sun and avoid a scorching burn. You're just suggesting a head start.</p>
<p>This is not anything he's worried about, I don't think he even cares. This was all about ME. HA! And I have had my fingers gently pried off my kid's ears. Guess it was the last thing I had to let go of...</p>
<p>And again, you folks are the greatest. Being new to all this stuff, looking back I don't know how we made it through the application process without these boards!</p>
<p>And I think he'll be getting that haircut in a couple of weeks.</p>
<p>Boy, I sure hope he doesn't find this thread. :)</p>
<p>If it makes you feel any better, I know that of which you speak. The good news is this, everyone's ears stick out farther once their hair has been shorn. It won't be him alone. Does he wear glasses? Wait until they get their BCGs. Now you're talking a goofy look. You want pictures? It's really funny to see kids who typically wear contacts but are required to wear their BCGs. They got that name for a reason ya know.</p>
<p>Pmarol, thanks for trusting in the board enough to ask a question like this. Your son sounds like a handsome young man. I'm sure his ears are just making more room for more brains, right?</p>
<p>I agree (without much information) that when a cadet or midshipman shows up for I-day or R-day or whatever they should leave the Academy a little hair to cut, but a shorter haircut to get used to the idea is probably a good idea. My daughter is planning on getting her hair cut in June (fingers crossed on an appointment) and donating to Locks-for-love.</p>
<p>
[quote]
From what I hear, it's not a good idea to show up at WP on R-Day with a fresh military haircut.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>My son has always worn his hair short. He got his last haircut about 2 weeks before R-day and didn't have any problems from the cadre. I wouldn't get a fresh haircut right before R-day, let the barber have something to cut off. :)</p>
<p>Pmarol - I understand your asking about this because I am a Mom too. If your son really wants to be at the academy (choose ARMY!) then he will get through it and will be fine. No matter what your name is or what you look like the cadre will find some way to give new cadets "extra attention". It is just part of beast barracks.</p>
<p>Pmarol,
I assure you, his ears are actually an asset to <em>you</em> for Plebe Summer. You will be able to spot your Mid in photos, while about 950 other moms will be wishing their kid has some hugely identifying physical trait. One thing I learned for sure last summer is: I have no idea what my son's ears look like. In the vast majority of the photos you'll be looking through this summer, you really/truly need to know what your kids ears look like, because you'll "spot" your son a good 50-100 times (or more), download all those photos to be able to proudly show him on his first leave time that 'you were keeping track of him through the summer', and he'll say over/over again (like ours did)..."Nice photo mom. Who is that? Nope...that's not me. Nope...that's not me either. No...not him either. Mom? Don't you even know what I look like???" lolol. Appreciate his ears.</p>
<p>OH, no! I will be that mom who has downloaded pix of everyone else. I can't even pick out my own trumpet player during half-time performances if they are all in uniform - and I even knew where he was in all the formations! :eek:</p>
<p>I don't know who said it but I remember hearing someone on here last year say they had printed the best photo of their child, framed it and gave it to grandma, one in both folks office .... put one on the frig etc (hopefully not the local paper!) ... then when kid came home at Thanksgiving there it was in all its glory - but NOT HER KID!!! :) ha ha Thankfully it was not me! Actually, I was blessed with a lot of good easily identifiable photo's of my D so I was happy, almost embarrassed at how many great photos and a video "interview" of her too! When I went to Parents Weekend I had the slide show of downloaded photos ready to go and thankfully the vast majority were my D. I think D's may be easier - though I don't know for sure - there is one or two photo's that I still swear are my D but she insists cannot be her because the people around her were not in her flight! I guess she knows best!</p>