CC newbie saying hi, sharing nervousness (LOL), and asking for insight

Parents Forum
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<p>Erin’s Dad - it just wasn’t “right”. At the other visits, he went with the flow and didn’t have any real concerns to share. Halfway through the New Paltz visit, he whispered to me that he didn’t like it there, that it seemed “too normal” and “rigid”. New Paltz has (all of the SUNYs actually have) very prescribed requirements including special gen ed ones, which is markedly different than the schools he prefers. Besides one philosophy professor, he also didn’t find the people we talked to and heard from very engaging. Sadly, it is true that the music department rep showed no interest in him at all even though we were the only ones there to talk to her at the time. The residence halls situation was noticeably worse than the other schools. We were also stunned to learn that if he wasn’t an actual music major, he wouldn’t be able to use any of the music practice rooms or have any instrumental or vocal instruction at all. (She also said that as a non-major, he could expect most of the music classes he took to have ~100 students in them.) At the other schools, the rooms and lessons were available to anyone who wanted them. That’s a huge, practical issue for him. </p>

<p>From a parental standpoint, I was particularly disturbed to hear them say in the info session that they didn’t want essays that had more than 250 words, that they didn’t have time to read them. :frowning: It was upsetting for two primary reasons - the first being that I felt it showed they don’t have much interest in learning about “who” the applicants really are (even staying at ~500 is difficult!) and the second being I felt that their advice could potentially hurt the applicants when it came to the other colleges they were applying to (colleges that may actually have time to read 500-word essays).</p>

<p>There were also a few other concerns, but those are the main ones.</p>

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<p>Did he look into Tufts?</p>

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<p>A couple of ideas:</p>

<p>SUNY Potsdam. I know it is a little further north than you might have considered, but it has a great artsy feel, there is a lot of opportunity for independent learning, close to some of the best nature hiking area in NY State, and a cute little town that isn’t too big but doesn’t feel like the absolute middle of nowhere. It also has an extremely strong music program.</p>

<p>Alfred University might also hit some buttons. My sister was very much into arts but felt Alfred was a bit too ‘quirky’ for her (she was very preppy and said, “these are not my people”). It might feel just right for your son.</p>

<p>Good luck, hope these help.</p>

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<p>Speaking as the parent of a Bard alum ('12) he sounds like he’d fit right in there.</p>

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<p>fosterte - It sounds like your son is a gifted writer. The SAT writing is a combo or multiple choice questions (mechanics) and essay. A well written essay will show that your son can do a fine job with time to prep and an engaging essay prompt.</p>

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<p>He sounds like a Bard (but not a Williams) student to me, too.</p>

<p>(Might Union be a reasonable match/safety?)</p>

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<p>Mini: there are students like that at Williams. Times change. In many ways Williams is more interdisciplinary and pedagogically open than Bard where students need to apply into some majors.</p>

<p>I think both are wonderful schools, and my S could probably been happy and learned oodles at both. BTW: I’ve been thinking about your D1. DS is writing a paper on opera as event stating with Cage and fanning out for an Art History grad class. Williams led my musician to Art History. Might have stayed in music at Bard, or Classics. We just can’t know. All these paths are fine.</p>

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<p>“Mini: there are students like that at Williams. Times change. In many ways Williams is more interdisciplinary and pedagogically open than Bard where students need to apply into some majors.”</p>

<p>We went through this with my older D not so very long ago. There are indeed students like that at Williams. There is a whole campus of them at Bard. Bard has a very different curriculum approach than Williams, with the last two years spent intensively on a capstone project. They are both wonderful schools. But not recognizing their differences, both in approach and student bodies, does both a disservice.</p>

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<p>I don’t have knowledge of Marlboro except what I’ve read, but when I read about your son I thought of it. It’s in Vermont, not as close, but you may want to take a look anyway. “At Marlboro, students collaborate closely with faculty to design an individualized course of study that allows them to explore their intellectual passions at a level of depth and sophistication experienced by few undergraduates at other colleges. They graduate with self-reliance and a clear sense of purpose, ready to forge their own career path or pursue graduate-level study.”</p>

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<p>A book you might grab from the library that has some “cool” schools and good descriptions of them: [Cool</a> Colleges: For the Hyper-Intelligent, Self-Directed, Late Blooming, and Just Plain Different: Donald Asher: 9781580081504: Amazon.com: Books](<a href=“http://www.amazon.com/Cool-Colleges-Hyper-Intelligent-Self-Directed-Different/dp/1580081509]Cool”>http://www.amazon.com/Cool-Colleges-Hyper-Intelligent-Self-Directed-Different/dp/1580081509)</p>

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<p>Hi again! You all are so awesome it’s hard to keep up with you! LOL</p>

<p>Random responses and updates in no particular order:</p>

<p>Union is right in our backyard - literally, it’s only a few miles down the road from our home! He could walk there for classes if he wanted to, which he probably would do - haha! Okay, back to seriousness. It has a great academic reputation and we briefly considered it, but we don’t think the “greek is deep” atmosphere would be a good fit. </p>

<p>Marlboro was on our initial long list, but I think it would be too small of a school for him.</p>

<p>Have not looked at Tufts or Alfred Univ - adding to the “to do” list.</p>

<p>We stumbled upon Deep Springs over the summer, and it was a very exciting option as far as I was concerned. As far as he was concerned? Um, no. LOL</p>

<p>Looked again at a few of the SUNYs for a financial safety. Unfortunately, we really don’t think any of them would be better than New Paltz. I don’t think the academic levels of Potsdam and Purchase are good matches, and Potsdam is too far away anyway. (Distance-wise, Purchase would be pushing it, but probably doable.) Geneseo seems like academically it might be good, but it too is farther away than he wants to be, and I’m pretty sure he would find the school more traditional than he is looking for. </p>

<p>So. . . believe it or not, we submitted his (EA) application to New Paltz as a financial safety! It will likely remain at the bottom of the list, but he has a few friends applying there, so if we were to end up having to go that route, it looks like he would at least be there with people he knows. </p>

<p>sevmom, yes, both of your points are so important. With four, it’s always a balancing act. They all have their own unique needs we have to keep in mind. I also try to not overly depend upon the grandparents. For example, they offered to pay for the test fees and application fees, and I declined. In addition to my full-time administrative job, I’m a part-time on-line instructor. Right now, I keep that load relatively light and basically use the money for family vacations. If need be, I could request a heavier load, put the money primarily into his college costs, and seriously trim vacation costs (we love to camp anyway! :wink: ). I’d rather NOT do that, but if I had to, I could.</p>

<p>I’m a little nervous from the responses that Bard might be a better fit than Williams and about his already applying ED to Williams. However. . . I have to keep in mind that after visiting Williams, he wanted to apply there ED, and I trust his judgement on this one. Also, since the acceptance rate is so low, it may not matter anyway. Williams has been doing this for a very long time, and their ridiculously high retention and graduation rates suggest they know what they’re doing when it comes to selecting great fits. I have trust in their decision process. We will wait - him patiently and me nervously! - until mid-December to figure out what our next step is. In the meantime, we will move forward with our visits to the other colleges and with seeing if there are other good matches to add to the list in case we need them. (I’m surprised no one has really said anything about Vassar???)</p>

<p>And. . . note that I don’t have enough posts to private message anyone, so if you sent me a PM, I would respond if I could, but I can’t. :)</p>

<p>colorado_mom, that was very nice what you said. Not that it’s necessarily the case (I think more of the words prolific and thoughtful), but it was sweet of you to characterize him the way you did. :)</p>

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<p>fosterte… welcome! I read your post and the first thing I thought of was how similar he seems to me S. My S graduated last Spring but is on a gap year… he just finished hiking the entire Pacific Crest Trail… 2650 miles BY HIMSELF!! He has always been independent and we have encouraged that. I would characterize him as an “intellectual hipppie”. He also likes to sleep outside instead of a bed…LOL!
He spent a semester of his junior year living. working and going to school on a rural organic farm in VT. So definitely a different type of HS kid. </p>

<p>Anyway… he was in love with Colorado College and applied ED… was sadly deferred then rejected… he also applied and got into UVM, he decided it was too big… he wanted smaller classes, and like you feared… it was the mosy expensive option he had. My S had similar test scores but his GPA was at about 3.6. He is going to St Lawrence University in Canton, NY. LOVES, LOVES this school… so all is well that ends well. He really liked Midd too, but that was an obvious rejection. I wish your S the best of luck… he sounds like a great kid… and I’m sure he and my S would be fast friends!!</p>

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<p>I would suggest looking at Bates in Maine. Actually, look at all three of the Maine LACs - adding in Bowdoin (reachy) and Colby.</p>

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<p>My son is not that different from yours. If he is accepted to Williams and the finances are doable, I think your son will be happy there. Don’t worry.</p>

<p>And my son discovered art history, his life’s vocation there, and is now in a graduate program in a discipline he barely studied there, and he is well prepared.</p>

<p>You’re right not to worry.</p>

<p>I think New Paltz EA was a wise decision as a last resort only. A safety net is nice, even when it’s not used.</p>

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<p>Thanks mythmom! I’m trying not to worry too much especially because doing so is exhausting!! We’re visiting Bard next weekend, and after that (per my son’s request), we are taking a break as he is feeling a little burnt out by this process too. If he doesn’t get into Williams, I really hope he gets into Bard. We shall see. . .</p>

<p>1012mom, Bates was on the initial long list, with Oberlin and New College of Florida as well. It just about broke my heart to cross them all off, but he insisted he didn’t want to go that far away and didn’t even want to pursue them as possibilities.</p>

<p>5boys - I LOVED reading about your son, and I wish I could meet him! It just seems to be in their blood, doesn’t it?! I too bet our sons would be fast friends. I’m so glad your son is happy up at St. Lawrence, and I hope he has found similarly-minded friends up there. My son’s best friend is one of his wilderness / Sacred Fire buddies (who does not go to my son’s HS), and it’s clear the bond they have is very, very different than the bond my son has with any of his other friends. </p>

<p>Thanks again for all of the advice and thoughts. It’s been very helpful!</p>

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<p>Not clear if you are looking for FA of any sort, including merit awards or you have unlimited resources. That was one of the top croteria when D. was choosing her UG. She did not have siblings at home, but her plan for going to Med. School was the reason to seek full tuition/full ride UG. however, my D. had very very clear picture of what she was looking for in choosing college.</p>