Take care of any checklist item where you would not be able to live with the consequences.
Then for anything else on the checklist, for your child’s benefit, let it go.
Lots of good advice. As mentioned above, small college towns are the worst for booking hotels. Ithaca is terrible. The first year, we spent the weekend. Since then, we drive up early (or just one of us), move him in, have dinner together, and drive 45 minutes to Binghamton for a reasonably priced hotel. Then, home the next morning. It’s 3.5 hours each way. The local stores had nothing left in stock for dorm supplies during move in weekend. Be prepared. As mentioned above, he has taken less each year.
Brought up before, but pack basic medical supplies that you would offer at home without wanting to run to a store. Include a thermometer. Also, have a serious discussion about what warrants a visit to the school health center and when one needs a hospital ER trip. Kids don’t always understand how dire a situation can be. Mine was only 16 when he started and that was a big concern. A friend walked him to the health center the first time he went, just to make sure he was ok (he didn’t really need him). We also had him sign medical proxy forms when he turned 18 for both NY and NJ. Make sure they know they can call anytime, day or night, with a medical concern. Mine was finally 18 this year for his broken foot and concussion (separate incidents).
His only photo ID was a passport ID. He got it stolen with his wallet the first month at school. Store those things safely in your room. Don’t carry ALL of your cash, debit cards, etc. in that wallet while walking around campus. Chances are, your student ID is all that you need on a regular basis to pay for things on campus. He can charge to his student account just about anywhere on campus including cab rides. The passport ID was the most difficult thing to replace after his wallet was stolen (other than his Cornell ID, which he needed to eat and to enter his dorm). He also had no cash until we saw him. He almost never needs any. He never takes any out of the bank. Ever.
Also, ENJOY the summer together (or whatever portion of it you have with your student) and don’t cry until you get in the car to leave.
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I would suggest taking a giant step backwards. Your soon to be college student likely wants to handle all of this themselves. BUT…you can out a limit on how much is able to be taken.
For example, we had a van, but four of the seven seats were going to be occupied by people. We made it clear to DS that we needed to be able to use the rear view mirror, and fit everything into the back back of the van.
For DD, we were going cross country. Flying SW, we had four suitcases, and two carry on bags. Period. If it didn’t fit in those bags, it couldn’t go. In her case, we did buy some bulky things at BBB near her college (mattress pad, pillow, etc).
We were clear…we would not ship anything to the college.
Both kids had too much stuff anyway.
DS started bringing stuff home at Thanksgiving. DD started at Christmas. They realized that having 14 changes of underwear was more important than having a ton of shirts or slacks. Or shoes.
My son has given the same advice often. Have your college student put everything they think they need in one room. Then take only half of what is there. The student will still have too much stuff!
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What about bringing cleaning supplies to go over drawers/desks/mattress, etc. before putting everything away? Does anyone do that or am I just going further down the rabbit hole?
Save the cleaning supplies for move-out at the end of the year.
Dorm rooms are usually in good condition at move-in. But at move-out, they’re usually disgusting, and the kid probably hasn’t done anything about it because (1) he/she’s a kid, and (2) final exams ended only hours earlier. There’s a monetary fine for leaving the room in poor condition, so there’s good reason to hand those cleaning supplies to your kid and get him/her to work.
I will add this as a task for the beginning of the school year…once your child has launched. Make any Doctor’s appointments that they will need to do during Winter break. My son needed several…dentist, eye doctor, physical, specialist. I had a very specific window of time, so I called in advance. Of course, all of my obsessive planning fell apart a bit as he got a temporary job as soon as he got home, so I had to reschedule a few of those appointments! Some had to be pushed into his March break. Oh well…
I also concur with booking flights for when student comes home. Thanksgiving Break is the crucial one as that is when prices really get jacked up. I had my son let me know his class schedule. Of course he didn’t know if professors would cancel classes at the last minute. His school officially was closed the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. We booked a Tuesday evening flight…and had to allow for plenty of time to get to a busy urban airport on the worst travel day of the year. I didn’t find coming home for Winter break such a big deal, but once we figured out Thanksgiving I had him figure out his Finals schedule so we could get that booked.
If your kid rents a fridge have them snap a picture of the cleaned out fridge before turning it in. We got s note claiming the fridge was not cleaned out. They argued with me until we sent a picture of the spic and span fridge my daughter snapped before returning it.
@marian, I purchased bed bug protectors for the dorm room mattress and for her pillow (that she brought from home). You hear some horror stories about bed bugs in dormitories. It adds to the cost of getting dorm room supplies, but it is well worth it!
Unless your kid is going to college in a large city, with ample public transportation, consider getting him or her a AAA membership. That will allow an 18-year-old to rent a car in many states (via AAA’s agreement with Hertz). My son also bought himself a Costco membership, and that’s a great idea if there is a Costco near the college - students can pitch in for bulk snacks and supplies. AmazonPrime is a great resource, and students can create their own accounts with free rush shipping. I have also used Visa Rewards for gift certificates to CVS, WalMart, Sears, and other stores that they can buy essentials at. My younger son has a car at college, and he was able to use Sears for new tires. Health coverage is a huge headache. It’s obscenely expensive, but national-access coverage supplies a lot of peace of mind. If your child attends college out-of-state, it is almost essential, because their colleges’ plan probably won’t cover them when they’re at home, much less if they have summer internships somewhere else. I concur with the recommendation that kids have credit cards. I wish I had opened a second account for their use exclusively, since we’ve already had to replace four cards when one son lost his. They can charge any travel, medical expenses, etc.
Not a parent, but student-athletes need changes of socks and underwear. A lot of them.
Every student needs changes of underwear…and a lot of them!
Maybe this is obvious, but think in advance about transportation. Does your kid need a car at college to get anywhere, or is that uncommon at that campus? Does your college have their own transportation system, and if so how widespread and accessible is it? Is it a bike and walk friendly campus? How easy is to get to your classes’ buildings from your dorm? Does the city itself have a transportation system? And if so, how accessible is it from campus and does it charge for students? Are most amenities near your campus or are they farther out? (I found that making a map of what I thought were ‘essential’ locations helped me put it into perspective.
undeuxtroiscat
We looked at transportation issues as part of the college search business. In my opinion, those issues need to be resolved before the student even applies.
I wouldn’t call it issues, though. If you apply to College A knowing you’ll probably need a car and College B knowing you’ll be set with its own transportation, then that’s fine. So, if you end up going to College B, you might want to know the details - what stops are where, how often it runs, how many lines there are and which day they’re serviced. If you did this much detailed planning in advance to applying, fine, but this is the Checklist for Parents of Incoming Freshman, and I guarantee there is someone out there who only glanced through the transportation consideration prior to applying and now will go back and research more thoroughly. I don’t think it was implied this would be applicable to all.
Maybe it’s me, but I felt my kids needed to figure out the public transportation system at college, not me.
I’m not meaning to be contrary, but this is not something I would put on my to do list for my incoming college freshman. At all.
But I can see that some parents would want to include this on their list.
I would be concerned about tying up the lose ends at home…so that the student had most of what they needed when they arrived at their college destination.
I’m a big list maker…and I made no lists when my kids were getting ready for college. But they made lists (and asked my opinion too…and asked me to review them).
That’s fine. It can be amended to “make sure your kid at least thinks about the following:”. If it seems like a list of things an incoming college freshman would do as opposed to a parent, it’s likely because I am an incoming college freshman and not a parent. Just trying to add a suggestion that has come up in discussion many times with other incoming college freshman in the thought that there are parents of incoming freshman that would not have considered it. Easy enough to take these suggestions as they become applicable to one’s own situation and disregard those that aren’t.
Here are some of my suggestions:
- Call your insurance company as soon as you drop your student off at school. If he does not have a car, you may receive a steep discount on his insurance. This is the case with my two sons. Neither has wheels at school, so there is a discount given. They still can drive a car, if needed, because they are on my insurance.
- Have roll or two of quarters packed. Yes, usually their student ID card serves many purposes including a way to do laundry if you put money on it. But, that may not be in effect as soon as they want to do laundry. This was the case with my younger son. He got to campus several days before other freshmen because he is an athlete. He wanted to do laundry about five days into his semester. But his card, which had money on it, did not work. He was resourceful, using dollar bills as a way to get change from the soda machine. Still, a roll or two of quarters would be things simpler.
- Pack a medical kit for your students. If you have a Walgreens in the area, see if you can register all insurance information with the pharmacy. This became important about two months into the semester. My son needed a prescription filled. He went to Walgreens and had no problem as the company has a nationwide-like system.
- Consider a small safe. This allows your student to keep important papers in one location, including a copy of his passport, driver's license, social security card and health insurance card. Your student also may want to keep an extra $20 there -- for emergencies.
- Credit card. I put my son as an authorized user on the card with the lowest available credit. Strange things happen. It is just a safeguard.
The school my son attends had 2 different bank ATMs available. We opened him an account at Bank of America. That is the bank his father and I have and we can transfer money into his account on line. We have used it a few times. Like most banks they let college students open the account fee free.
If your kid is taking a car to campus, be sure she knows the basics of what to do if she’s involved in a traffic accident. Some kids may have never experienced a fender bender, and might do or say something which could cause problems later. Somewhat related: what to do when they see flashing lights behind them: get to lighted area, if they’re unsure if it’s a police officer call 911, etc. Neither of these situations is the optimum time to call Mom and Dad for advice. The kid needs to know.