CNN: Push to achieve tied to suicide in Asian-American women

Parent Cafe
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<p>I'm not sure about the validity or completeness of this woman's study, but I think we all have seen the many students who post on this board who fear their parents' rejection or disapproval because of their choice of college, choice of major, grades, or test scores. Many of these students cite their Asian background when describing their troubles.</p>

<p>CNN articles don't have the best formatting for giving the highlights of an article, so please excuse the skipping around I did.
<a href="http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/05/16/asian.suicides/index.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/05/16/asian.suicides/index.html&lt;/a>

[quote]
Asian-American women ages 15-24 have the highest suicide rate of women in any race or ethnic group in that age group. Suicide is the second-leading cause of death for Asian-American women in that age range. [...]</p>

<p>As Noh and others have searched for the reasons, a complex answer has emerged.</p>

<p>First and foremost, they say "model minority" pressure -- the pressure some Asian-American families put on children to be high achievers at school and professionally -- helps explain the problem. [...]</p>

<p>Asian-American parents, he says, are stricter with girls than with boys. "The cultural expectations are that Asian women don't have that kind of freedom to hang out, to go out with friends, to do the kinds of things most teenagers growing up want to do."</p>

<p>And in Asian cultures, he added, you don't question parents. "The line of communication in Asian culture one way. It's communicated from the parents downward," he says. "If you can't express your anger, it turns to helplessness. It turns inward into depression for girls. For boys it's more likely to turn outwards into rebellious behavior and behavioral problems like drinking and fighting." [...]</p>

<p>She says American culture has adopted the myth that Asians are smarter and harder-working than other minorities.</p>

<p>"It's become a U.S.-based ideology, popular from the 1960s onward, that Asian-Americans are smarter, and should be doing well whether at school or work."</p>

<p>Noh added that simply being a minority can also lead to depression. [...]</p>

<p>While some women in her study did seek help through counseling and prescription drugs, most of her subjects were ambivalent or even negative about counseling. "They felt the counselor couldn't understand their situation. They said it would have helped if the counselor were another Asian-American woman."

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<p>Pay attention parents. I have seen at least one suicide that I think was tied to unrealistic parental pressures re: college. Even one death is way too much! There are hundreds if not thousands of schools that can lead to success and satisfaction in life, not to mention majors. Everyone doesn't have to go to Harvard and go into medicine. Lighten up!!</p>

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<p>My cousin (old enough to by my mother) and her husband posted charts of grammar rules all over the living room, and math problems around the kitchen, etc., when their only D was a toddler. (not Asian) D was #1 in school all they way until med school. She married, and they disapproved of the man. She had a baby, and they broke up the marriage, and took her and baby in, and kept father away. D had a breakdown, had to leave med school, and even tho under the care of a psychiatrist, committed suicide a couple years later. A horrible tragedy. They raised the little boy, who rebelled and played sports and didn't want to study - they never did know what to do with him. They never did see that they were a contributing cause. People like that know they are right, and the child was too weak to do what was necessary.</p>

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<p>I think of that Stanford grad student....</p>

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<p>Re Post #1: I hadn't thought about the fact that I don't see a lot of Asian-American women in the fields of psychiatry & psychology, although they are there in other fields of medicine (practice & research).</p>

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<p>Those of us with Phds are used to hearing that we're "not REAL doctors" so psychologist probably doesn't count for the ambitious parent.</p>

7

<p>
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And in Asian cultures, he added, you don't question parents.

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<p>That's definitely true. I have gotten so many "Is that the way you speak to your elders?" :<. My parents are muich liberal-er than most, though. I'm Asian, not American.</p>

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<p>Just got an SAT prep summer school brochure in the mail. It was printed in English & Korean. It included prep courses for everything under the sun, including CTY tests, which are not supposed to be prepped for at all. I can't imagine the hellish summers experienced by kids sitting at computer terminals for hours each day, drillling, drilling, drilling.</p>

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<p>Approximately 15% of the students at D’s h/s are Asian and the males do seem to have more freedom than the females. Very few Asian students are involved in school clubs or play team sports - with the exception of math team and science club. Although many of the males with go to the school dances and attend home games. I’m not sure if the females don’t want to be involved or aren’t allowed to participate.</p>

<p>Question: When I first joined CC there was a thread about a female student at MIT who committed suicide and her parents blamed MIT and sued – was she Asian?</p>

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<p>I wonder if the suicide rate is changing over time, or is a new phenomenon, and if this is the first time it has been studied. Two of my wife's best friends in high school had Asian immigrant parents. Her best friend (and the maid of honor at our wedding) in particular was pressured by her parents. When another girl (WashMom as it turns out) was selected as "Girl of the Year" her parents flipped out and pretty much wouldn't talk to WashMom for a long time, even though ChineseFriend was valedictorian and going off to Stanford to study Engineering. WashMom's other best friend was the daughter of Japanese immigrants. She doesn't complain about her parents so much, but she has told me that she got sick of the Asian Superstar stereotype. Slightly paraphrased, "I'm not a genius. I don't like to study. I'd rather hang out with my friends than go to the library. You don't have to be smart to be Japanese."</p>

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<p>
[quote]
It included prep courses for everything under the sun, including CTY tests,

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<p>StickerShock – what is the CTY test?</p>

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<p>CTY is the Center for Talented Youth, run out of Johns Hopkins. In 5th & 6th grades, I seem to remember the CTY test being the PLUS. You were eligible to sit for it if nationally normed standardized tests, like the TerraNovas, showed you to be in the 97th percentile or above. I'm pretty sure the PLUS was a 9th grade level test, so kids in those top percentiles could be identified as merely bright, or truly gifted on a test with a higher ceiling. The various CTY programs have different score requirements so that participants are properly placed & served. But prepping skews all that. Kids are supposed to walk into the test cold, so true natural aptitude can be identified.</p>

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<p>
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Kids are supposed to walk into the test cold, so true natural aptitude can be identified.

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</p>

<p>When my sons tested for CTY, they had to take the SAT. Son2 (I need to come up with a screen name for him...) was only in 7th grade when he took it. When I walked him into the test center he got a lot of funny looks. Both of them were supremely confident since we had only told them that they were taking a test "just like" the one the took in school in the fifth grade. WashDadJr, who took it in 8th, thought it was "fun."</p>

<p>Taking prep tests to get into the CTY program kind of boggles my mind. I'm not surprised, but I am surprised at the same time, if that makes any sense.</p>

14

<p>Yes, it was the PLUS in grades 5-6 and the SAT in 7-8. My son finds most testing "fun" also. Not Chemistry though.</p>

<p>TutuTaxi</p>

<p>I hope you're not asking so you can rush out and start studying for it!</p>

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<p>bethievt. The only think I'm PLUS is size!!!!!</p>

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<p>
[quote]
The only think I'm PLUS is size!!!!!

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LOL! Sadly, the days of being able to wear a tutu have passed me by as well.</p>

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<p>Now CTY uses the SCAT for 5th and 6th grades. My son took it this year, but I turned out not to be ready for him to go to a residential camp this summer. Since I have never seen a SCAT test or a PLUS test, I don't know what the difference is (if any).</p>

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<p>Tutu, recall a thing or two about that case. I remember it appeared that the parents were completely out of touch with their daughter's distress. Denial all the way.</p>

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<p>
[quote]
Question: When I first joined CC there was a thread about a female student at MIT who committed suicide and her parents blamed MIT and sued – was she Asian?

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Yes, she was. I remember reading an article in Time about it. She wrote really despondent poetry and then set herself on fire after she couldn't bring herself to slit her wrists. Pretty old case by now, it occurred in 2000. Is anybody aware of the outcome of that lawsuit?</p>

<p>Oh, I found the Wikipedia page for it, here it is:</p>

<p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elizabeth_Shin%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elizabeth_Shin&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p>

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<p>That's really a tragic story. According to the wikipedia article, she had perhaps tried to commit suicide as a high school senior when she wasn't named valedictorian.</p>