<p>It’s only “prostitution” when it’s sold for a pittance…</p>
<p>The part about seeing these 50-60 year olds as mentors and lovers and etc. was absolutely disgusting. I have people older than me of that age group who I consider mentors and to think of having relations with them is just gross beyond gross. It just seems so incredibly manipulative- the old person holds almost all the strings. </p>
<p>Anyways, I think people get married later because of their careers and whatnot. You have a lot more possibilities when you’re not tied down and are only responsible for yourself. Also, I suppose people in your peer circle will be inevitably more mature and better for long term relationships. Also, weddings are expensive!</p>
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<p>Not always! :D</p>
<p>Actually, DIVORCES and splitting up everything and having two separate households that used to be joing is expensive–MUCH more than most weddings, especially with child support and counseling and legal fees.</p>
<p>I think the agreements that are made between the parties for “sugar parent” or “sugar baby” may not be enforced in many courts (courts generally won’t enforce things that are “illegal”), but have no idea because can’t recall any such agreements being discussed in any of my classes; it may depend on how explicit things are in the contract.</p>
<p>Wealthy and high status men have kept mistresses? This is a new trend, as long as by new we mean ‘since the paleolithic era’. About 280 women in NYU (out of about 20,000) enrolled in the site, but were there any resulting relationships? I’ll bet most signed on out of curiosity or for pure amusement value.<br>
After reading the article, I have no idea how many actually ended up with any interest in the guys on the site, so this could be much ado about a rare phenomena. The main innovation is that the men are so pathetically office-bound that they can’t meet anyone outside a web site (which also gives this enough public exposure to generate a newspaper article). I just wish it were called golddiggers.com, or richlosers.com.</p>
<p>The reviews posted from young women (& some older men) are mostly pretty scary and negative. It is surprising that there hasn’t been a lawsuit and/or crime linked to this website yet.</p>
<p>Also am wondering what evidence there is that the profiles and reviews are genuine and that the info provided by the founder is accurate as to how many young women are actually on his site and what their affiliations are–whether college or other? Wonder what kind of checks are done to be sure the people listing aren’t convicted sexual predators, violent criminals or running escort services or more.</p>
<p>I guess before all this hype I was unaware that this stuff was going mainstream and being given airtime on 20/20, ABC, NYT and other reputable media outlets.</p>
<p>Do the “sugar dadies” issue 1099s in January? How does being a “sugar baby” affect your EFC?</p>
<p>Fortunately, my D wouldn’t be game for this so I don’t have to decide how I feel about it for her, but I don’t feel like I want to judge those gals who do partake. That is all.</p>
<p>I do question the legality of this sort of thing and see no difference between in and the “escort” services that have been busted. </p>
<p>Any parents offering up their kids for this “scholarship”?</p>
<p>“The part about seeing these 50-60 year olds as mentors and lovers and etc. was absolutely disgusting. I have people older than me of that age group who I consider mentors and to think of having relations with them is just gross beyond gross.”</p>
<p>Ha, that will come to bite you in the butt. When I was in college, a roommate of mine had, let us say, an “unusually close relationship” with a Titan of industry (parents would know the name; kids today wouldn’t) who was a friend of her family. He would arrange for a private jet to pick her up and take her to the Hamptons for the weekend, that type of thing. We never knew exactly what transpired – but he was maybe late thirties/early forties at the time and we were all “ewwww, gross” at the thought of sleeping with a guy that old. Well, here I am, late forties with a husband in his early fifties, and it’s not “ewwww, gross” lol.</p>
<p>Am I the only one who objects to the term “co-ed” used to describe female students? This is a hangover from the days when females were add-ons at universities, where the primary mission was to educate men. It’s been considered demeaning since the 70s, at least.</p>
<p>I realize that this pales in comparison to the (apparent) fact that these people are blatantly running a prostitution business, but still.</p>
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<p>I have known a few college-educated couples who got married in college and have been happy. Getting married does not mean either spouse cannot work or continue his or her education. My wife and I lived apart for two years while she was finishing her medical residency. I have seen studies finding that couples marrying young have higher divorce rates, but I wonder if this remains true when controlling for education. What is the divorce rate for 23-year-old college grads who marry? Married people are on average happier than singles, so five extra years of being married are worth something. For most of American history, and for many countries in the world today, 23 years old has not been considered too young to get married.</p>
<p>Several people have deplored the hook-up culture at many college campuses. Sexual desires will be channeled towards hook-ups or even sugar-daddy relationships if young people believe that serious relationships and marriage are encumbrances.</p>
<p>Of my five closest friends, we all got married to guys we dated in college, and we were all married by age 25. (I myself was married at 21, right after graduating.) it didn’t hurt our careers at all. Indeed, we stayed put in our city precisely because i was the higher earner for a while. It’s the childbearing that throws a wrench into things, not the marriage.</p>
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<p>I think it usually understood that men pay to get the nitwit to go away. Can you imagine having to be a real boyfriend and pretend you are interested in Ashley Dupre’s music?</p>
<p>On the other hand, anyone read Steve Martin’s “Object of Beauty”?</p>
<p>I don’t approve of the hook-up culture, but I think those who engage in it will look back on it in later years as a youthful indiscretion.</p>
<p>That, to me, is very different from beginning your adult life as a prostitute.</p>
<p>Some young women may do this to experience the “high life” that they couldn’t afford otherwise; sort of a trip to another world. They may view it as a transitory situation and see only the benefits at first, but it’s really hard to imagine it not taking a toll on their self-respect in the long run. I feel sorry for these young women. I also don’t think this is a new phenomena- just a new way of advertising.<br>
Years ago I answered an ad for a place to live while working in New York, and after visiting the apartment it was clear what the intent was. ( I was young and didn’t see the “red flags” until I actually met the person.) There are rich men in New York who are accustomed to buying everything they need, including sex, without giving anything emotionally of themselves. While I don’t think the young women going into these set-ups are bad people, I do think they are often unprepared for what it does to a person to be treated like a commodity.<br>
Relationships take practice. If a young woman spends her free time in as a sex servant, she’s not likely to fine tune her relationship skills, and in fact, it can stunt her growth in that area. It’s not a situation that any parent would support for their daughter, I really believe that.</p>
<p>Percentage married or engaged at college graduation? How about percentage who were ever in a “relationship” during their college years? It’s tough out there for girls who attach emotion to sex. They are silenced, made to think they are needy for wanting love, or that wanting a relationship means they are too eager to get married, or that they should care more about building careers, or that they are prudes.
I have no problem with consenting adults having whatever arrangements are mutually satisfying and safe. A strong argument can be made for getting paid rather than feeling used.</p>
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<p>Nice. I’d love hear what your basis is for assuming that these guys are so much smarter than the young women they pay. I think it’s far more likely that they pay because (a) the women wouldn’t look twice at them if they weren’t paying; and/or (b) they’re married and figure it’s safer to do it that way, in terms of avoiding any romantic entanglements.</p>
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<p>One issue is that the type of relationship desired by women described above tends to be far more time-consuming, emotionally demanding, and psychologically constraining than most undergrads…especially young men are ready for at that stage of their lives. </p>
<p>Several female undergrads at my LAC have said as much as a reason why they aren’t planning to pursue a relationship of any kind and looked askance at classmates who pined for such relationships. </p>
<p>Moreover, wearing such feelings on one’s sleeve…especially if it is to the extreme of my older female HS classmate’s unfortunate encounter with the late forty-something male date who was clueless enough to use their first date as his therapy session to rant about his ex* or according to several male friends…having female dates start chatting endlessly about their visions/hopes marriage & kids on the very first date*…tends to send more level-headed folks like them and myself running for the hills. </p>
<p>Such dating behaviors betray excessive neediness, self-absorption, desperation, and future misery for anyone foolhardy enough to proceed further. </p>
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<li>One would think it’s common sense to not do any of these on a first date. Am I being a bit old-fashioned in expecting that it should be focused on getting to know each other in a fun manner without too much pressure from expectations or past emotional baggage?</li>
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